When she looked back
and recalled her past,
she had too many questions to ask.

In her soul
there were too many holes.
In her mind, too many spaces left blank.
The people in her life
may give her answers to fill some of them,
But some she had to answer,
So who can answer
on behalf of herself?

When she looked back,
she saw the little girl she was,
walked to her,
knelt down and placed her hands on her shoulders,
looked her in the eyes and asked her,
"Tell me, what are you?"

She hugged her and told her,
I know you are hopeless,
but I have to tell you the truth;
Giving love so generously
isn't a guarantee
that it will be given back to you.

When she looked back,
She felt nostalgic.
She misses the time her mind and heart weren't tired enough not to try anymore.

When she looked back,
she saw colors, paints, and hand-written letters.
She saw a child who loved making friends
and playing with glitter.

She saw the people she wishes they told her the truth,
that her heart will break,
and her paints will fade away soon.

When she looked back,
she saw all the beautiful things,
that eventually lead to her crash.

When she looked back,
she felt sorry for her younger self.
Giving away love, letters, and roses
in a desperate hope for someone giving her back a hug.

When she looked back,
She felt sorry for her older self.
Because today she vindictively takes down the pictures and burns her own legacy.