The rain has stopped
But the clouds don't part
They can't.

The news says it is still raining,
But when I finally look out the window
I don't see the rain sliding down.

But why would I not trust the meteorologist?They are in charge
of warning us when a storm is coming.
So they always say it's raining,
But the rain stopped so many years ago.

"You don't have to say it back"
This phrase
plagues my mind,
taunts my heart and
haunts my soul.

My beliefs are
a window into the world I come from.
Like a father's simple switch;
The one shown outwardly isn't the same
as the one in his house.

If everything I do,
everything I don't do,
makes me feel like I ****** up.
How can I feel worthy
of your love?

I will always love you.
But there is never any pressure to say it back.

Hiding my pain.
Helping others with theirs.
Taking on others' burdens,
hoping
praying that I don't become one of them.
It has always been,
and will always be...

A cycle.
Love has always felt like a cycle.
A recognizable pattern,
always noticed too late.
I love you.
I tolerate you.
I'm tired of you.

Like a toy to a child,
I will grow stale.
Doomed to being left to rot
once a newer, better toy arrives.

I want this feeling to end.
I want to hear you say you love me,
and I want to wholeheartedly believe you.
But how can I
When I'm not worthy of your time?

Like a child to her father,
I will always love you.
But like a father to his child,
You don't have to say it back.
...
...
...
But my heart heals when you do.