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Lulu Jun 8
i always thought scars were physical—
not internal,
until you proved me wrong.
it took me so long to realise
that i’m not just bleeding on the outside
but on the inside too.

i wish you could feel the pain i endured—
with no one there to rescue you,
all alone in a deep hole,
a loophole of despair,
waiting to be saved,
but no one ever comes.

i wish you had scars like mine,
etched both inside and out.
but praying for your pain
won’t bring me joy or peace.
not anymore.

perhaps your pain
was never mine to wish for—
but maybe
your lack of existence
is.
Lulu Jun 7
I like to swim
deeper than the ocean,
slowly losing my breath
until I cannot breathe.

I like to swim
with my eyes wide open,
all alone in the ocean.
Maybe solitude is all I am destined for,
and validation is not what I should crave for.

I like to swim—
the deeper I go, the more I find peace,
peace in my silence.
Or should it cost my life to find peace?

I like to swim.
Being in the ocean leads to empathy…
or is it sympathy?
Is my existence
a grievance?

I like to swim.
But maybe I should go now.
Maybe the fishes are dreading
my absence.
My presence is polluting the ocean.

I like to swim.
But maybe it is time to go now.

— The End —