You said goodbye
Like it would be a grenade in my heart
Waited for the bang
Not realizing I had let go from the start
You thought it would be better
If we were to stay here, both worlds apart
You said goodbye
But the horse had not been put before the cart

You wanted a reaction
You wanted me to cry
You wanted me to cling
Instead I wanted you to fly
You wanted to be justified
For walking away one final time
But instead what you got
Was a mind accusing you of crime

You said "no more"
Not in three months
Or even four
But what you missed
And what I tried to say
Is that I know you need to go
And I didn't think you should stay

You said goodbye
Like it would be a grenade in my heart
Waited for the bang
Not realizing I had let go from the start
You thought it would be better
If we were to stay here, both worlds apart
You said goodbye
But the horse had not been put before the cart

It finally makes sense
You and him
No longer haunt me
The desperation is gone
The void is filled
And the wound is healed
The digging has stopped
The music is just music again
No one needs to understand
Because now I'm able
To stop the If Onlys
No tortured metaphors
No anguish in the back of my head
No longer in pieces
Now in peace

See the thrashing
The panic
Hear the cries
The screams
Know their drowning
With no help
Instinct engages
I dive in head first

The thrashing calms
Panic subsides
Less crying
Screams change to whispers
Support gives purpose
I hold on tight
Promising not to let go

Now cast aside
Once they can swim again
Alone in the expanse
Realizing their support
Kept me afloat
I feel myself begin to sink
Slipping beneath the waves

See the thrashing
The panic
Hear the cries
The screams
She knows I'm drowning
With no help
Instinct engages
She dives in head first

DON'T PERPETUATE THE CYCLE...

I know I made mistakes
And I know I should have been there more
I know you needed more
And I know I should have tried harder
I know you I should have told
And I know not saying cost us
I know that's all on me
And I know I don't deserve you
But if I ever get a second chance
I know it will be different

Somethings need no explanation
You see a word
You know it's spelt wrong
A letter out of place
You just know it

You may know nothing about music
Until a wrong chord is struck
One bad note
And no one has to tell you
You just know it

I came to know you
Beyond the person people see
There was nothing out of place
No wrong chord in my heart
The perfect imperfections
A true mountain leveled to a molehill
There were no words to explain
I just knew it

Turned away
Unable to withdraw
Turned towards
Unable to get close
Invisible forces in action
Unable to resist
Despite desperate intentions
Always unable
To resist your magnetism

The unknown fate of the caterpillar
Will it be butterfly or moth
Beauty or disgust
The caterpillar doesn't know
While it spins its cocoon
And begins its compulsory service
Waiting and waiting
To see what it becomes
At last the moment...
My bitterness emerges