30th poem put away
I did it all in just one day
I have some fun
And learned allot
I have shared emotion
I thought could not
But now i know truth and sight I'm not so blind
To love and light

Smoking an endless line of cigarettes
Or drinking an endless bottle of *****
We all have addictions
They are who we are
A wise man once said a man without vices
is a man without virtue
but I disagree
I wish my addictions would let me be

I wake in the morning to the 5:30 bell
my back it hurts from digging wells
im just an old cowboy it's plain to see
their aren't to many men like me
But sure as come the first thing I do
A Marlboro red to get me through
A snort of *****
A pinch of dip
A sip of Johnnie walker
Now that's the ****

But it's getting bad
it's my convictions
I struggle with demons and many addictions

I met her she kissed me
she went away
i stalked her I love her
what else can i say

One at night While I laid sleeping
A vision came so subtly
A bird she had blue eyes and red spotted wings
She spoke In a soft voice come
I went
We flew far and as we went higher her wings spanned longer
we flew across the mountain ranges and all the hills
People below flee from her but I do not fear
We came into the clouds where a land span came
Milk flowed from the rocks
Honey poured from the caves
And on the field lay
Eight thousand flowers
Four hundred honey dues
six hundred and eighteen Lillie's
and nine hundred and seventeen roses
Their colors are
Red,Blue,Violet
There as we landed the sky had a misty golden blue touch
As if God had painted it himself  
And then at once I heard a voice saying feast
Before me a table was laid, upon it was
Three hundred loaves of bread
two hundred and fifty seven cut's of poultry
fifty seven steaks
nine hundred and eighteen bottles of wine
sourdough bread was taken from the three hundred
Cobb salad
Wild Alaska salmon nicely laid before me
A bell was then brought to me by a lady
She wore a velvet ribbon in her hair and all else of her attire was black
She said to me
Feast never alone
I rang the bell and there came
forty mill workers
twenty widdows
fifty wives with their husbands
One handmaid
Three gravediggers
And nine children
We all sat
A prayer was spoken
We began to eat but as I drank the wine I became tired
I fell to sleep
When I awoke death was around me
He said choose to come or stay
And In my words I spoke
Lest I die
I will never leave
A land of bliss I gave for this

Lord please take these shakes away cure this habit my body craves
Don't let me fall off the wagon again cause if I do it all will end
I need a place to hide my thoughts from solving my problems with a whiskey drop
In this pain i feel so dry but another drink could end my life
So Lord i need strength i need it now
cause this Alcoholics feeling down

I'm blind to hate and all emotion
I'm blind to love and deep devotion
I'm blind to ***
I'm blind to smell
I'm blind in sight
I'm blind oh well

Shut you're ******* mouth you ****
get on the ******* bed
I hope you like hard you *****
now give me ******* head
You're gonna want it wet
when I put it in your ***
I'm gonna be your first
But I ain't your ******* last

I want you hear you ******* scream
I wanna see you cry
I want to see your ******* look like ****** cherry pie
I'm not looking for tomorrow
I don't really give a ****
Forget the ******* ****
I want you're blood all on my ****

I want squeeze you're ******* ****
until they're ******* purple
And choke you like a little *****
And ******* like yokel

I wanna watch you fade away
As I choke you out
And when you finally wake back up
Put my **** back in your mouth

I don't give 2 ***** about tomorrow or now
I don't give a **** if the sun comes out
I could give 2 ***** about certain or doubt
All I wanna do is blow my ******* brains out

Life is **** it always is
Nobody really cares who you are or where you've been
You can sit in the corner and ***** and pout
But all I wanna do is blow my ******* brains out

Desert sand in my veins
I have seen so much pain
Felt the fire felt the rain
Of bullets

Cold as ice
Hot as hell
Going in
Wish me well
Like the wind in my sails
Of bullets

Better days yet to come
Miss my wife
Miss my son
But I cant see them
Until I face
The bullets

Burn to a pole
Beat her with a stick
shes a witch
shes a witch
burn her
burn
her

Could you love me
If i were gone out of this place

There is a darkness in this land of pain and tortures from man's hand.

From unkept promise's lies and pain deception of truth and evil things.

Misery loves company and this poor boy sings harmony.

In the darkness where I stand a light it shines in my hand.

That light is that of unspoken words and the truths that you have never heard.

Wisdom is that which keeps me strong and in this poem you'll find my song.

To live in love is good to die may blessings find you in your life.

Sweet bitter death when will you come
Make haste before the sun shines
Save me
Make me a man
I do not fear it
I welcome it
Death

Today is now done with my writing
for truly has been in-sighting
I bid you farewell
till tomorrow has shown
I will be
forever grateful

He came in the room
He sat right down
He pulled down his pant's
He laughed like a clown
When I tried to run
He said bend over
Dr ****
Has come for closure

Hear me not
Yea I shall speak no more
No longer shall I endure my mind
The vivid pictures it paints
Defile me
I speak with clear conscious
My conclusion is contaminated
Does my death arrive soon
  People are bidding me farewell
But I have no plans to leave
Mother said forget those dreams

Hearing the music grow softer
It calms me
Smiles of yesterdays past
I can still feel the warmth of the sun on my face
Back in those times I could smile
I was free to love
And be loved
so far now it seems
I must forget those dreams

Wish
To wish for what
A kiss
Just one more moment with you
One more touch
Then I shall depart from you
so hard to let go of you
Hard to believe
I must forget my dreams

What are word it can be used as a noun a verb or even an adjective
Yet is looked at as a horrible thing
To see people use this word makes me smile
****
If it were only a formal word life would be better

**** your vibes
and **** your dreams
**** on your hopes
and cut your strings
after I'm done i'll play my fiddle
throw you in a ditch *****
Life's a ******* riddle
******* *******
Eat a bag of ****
Mamma out ******* ****
Trying to get a fix
daddy out beating mamma
Trying to get his pay
hard ******* life
Great ******* day

I don't want to talk
I don't wanna feel
Get out of my life
This time
I'm
For
Real

Goodnight to all my fellow writers dreamers poets or all nighters.

I'm off to rest my weary head and lay upon my softened bed.

It was an honor writing for you but now I'm off to dream a new.

And maybe when the morning comes I'll hear the birds sing of love.

I love to write of all I do and so to my friends I'll dream of you.

Goodnight

P.s.
Don't let the evil demon woman that lives in the closet and hums at 3:00 am bite or eat your soul

Xoxo

Hell shall we be
Hell we are already there
Goodbye reality
Hello Sleep
Deprivation

Up in Biddeford, Maine
Ragged worn and scarred
Her face was aged with care
But her hands are what caught my eye
I could not help but stare
They were careful as they moved
As though they had been trained and known
I could tell by her moving fingers
All her life she had sewn
I asked her but one question
She gave but one reply
She sewed my denim very well
Then tears fell from her eyes

Now down in New Orleans
I wondered quite a while
I recall a gypsy woman
She had a lovely smile
Her hands were soft and smooth
Her fingers kind to touch
She read my fortune cracked laugh
And said
You don't talk much

over ways in Georgia
I climbed upon a pine
I saw a preacher 6 feet tall
His hands were built like mine

And cross the mile in Memphis
Across through Tennessee I fell in love with a woman
But she sure did not love me

Over out California as west as you can go
I found me a lady who
The prettiest one I've ever known

the wintered chilled Alaska
over on Ice peak
I found a comfy sledding dog
he saved me from the street

Upon the sea in New York where ocean meets the bay
I caught a bullet in the lung from some guy named Jay

Though I've traveled far
and seen a lot of lands
I never a seen hands like yours
Since Christ has died for man

I'm bleak
I'm strange
I have no thought
My mind is lost a dark black blot
Fortune finds me then it leaves as picture of a breeze
Captured forever in my mind
Completely lost far in time
Understand that i have not of which i speak of which i thought
Do you keep in memory of yourself
Through forgotten memories of yourself
Do hate me love or all the same what is that inside your brain
Do speak with anger or with love
Are you kind and gentle as a dove
Are you lost in time
Or lost in sin
Do hate the world you are trapped in
Does you grow faster
Or does it stop
Do love yourself
Or do you not
My haze of anger i'm caught up in
Is like a dream of fortunes end

Here we go once again writing and fighting words of man
I hate it I love it I need it oh well
I guess the words are like a well
so empty

I can feel the morning glowing down on the window in my mind
Giving me the hope that love is something more than just a little light
Teaching me that yesterday is something that I never thought of trying
Looking in the love and the healing in the colors in her eyes

Waking to the morning wondering when love will come again
running from the traces the people and the places that I've been
Looking at her as she sits kissing her with love that never ends
Her smile is the one thing I hope and pray I'll one day see again

I wish I was
I wish I was
So many growing things
Caterpillars butterfly's
A mite on an eagles wings
I wish I was
I wish I was
But I will never be
So as I wish I Dream it to
To be so many things

To those I have hurt
to the dreams I have stoked
to the girls I left stranded
to the men that I broke
to the enemy killed
to the jobs that weren't done
to time's that were missed
to all I have wronged
I have but these words to leave and to give
I am sorry my love
I am sorry as ****

Think of pain and think of suffering and you think of me.

Think of death your last breath and pray you never see.

I am the reaper the angel of death I've taken many strong.

A i am the ending of beginning I'm bound to find you all.

I have brought fear to all that's near I've made the bravest cry.

I was there when Jesus Christ the Lord was crucified.

I stood upon the shallow trenches dug in world war one.

I watched the bomb fall upon a nation of the sun.

When soldiers hear me or they see me they pray I'm on their side.

I am the reaper bringer of death to all that live shall die.

Blowing with no destination no home
Going where many have gone
Singing with the creature of the night
Whispering in the tree's
Buzzing with the bee's
Slowly softly touching the end
Rising and destroying everything in my path
With no awareness of what I have done
If I were the wind
My life would find peace
Only
If
I were the wind

Ah yes the 5th of November
A night I remember well
she came and sat at a barroom
she looked like **** and hell
I asked if she was *****
Yes was her reply
I ****** his wife so gently
on a  cold November night
I always will remember
But friends please wish me well
He put a bullet in my lung
But I sent him to hell

I keep in though why
I dont know here i go and lost
Help me mother father brother sister
save me from tribulation

I'm a poet that's what i am from word to pen then i'm your man
I can write about day i can write about night
I can write about love
I can write about life
Because i'm a poet
that's what i do
Writing through wisdom
and writing through you

I'm so blue without you
I sit and wonder what i could do
I wish i could kiss you once again
Your lips so tender
Your heart so big
You used to love me you said it allot
But now it seems our loves a blot
Come back darling you know its true
I'm oh so lonely and oh so
Blue

I miss love
I miss hugs
I miss friends
I miss my wife
I miss my daughter
I miss my mother
I miss my father
I miss religion
I miss being sober
I miss love

Why do i sit why do i think.
Why do i smoke why do i drink.
I guess it's because i have no hope.
A heart that's hurt is one that's broke.
My soul is weary my dreams are dead.
My thoughts keep rushing through my head.
I reflect on my past on what i do
On all the things i dream of to.
My mother she nursed me when i was birthed.
My father he loved me when i was hurt.
My brothers they showed me right from wrong
how to fight and stay so strong.
The army showed me *******.
How to block out what i feel.
How to sit and speak of silence.
How to turn fear into dead cold violence.
The devil taught me how to steal how to hate and make a deal.
Jesus showed me how to love.
And showed me theirs a God above.
The world it turned me cold and sad.
A woman drove me nearly mad.
But in the end it's all the same.
We live we die and love again.