I've wrote this a thousand times
I've erased this a thousand times,
You shouted at me a thousand times,
You laughed with me a thousand times,
You held me a thousand times,
You protected me a thousand times,
You guided me a thousand times,
You told me it will be okay a thousand times, You wiped my tears a thousand times,
You told me to smile a thousand times,
You told me you wouldn't leave me a thousand times.
You told me you would stay by my side a thousand times
You left and now I cry for you a thousand times..

First she is a daughter
Born flawless, perfect, like the most purest forms of water
Second she is a wife
The rock, the backbone, the strength behind her other half's life
Third she is a mother
Who undoubtedly, unconditionally, loves her children like no other

You want to know a woman's worth?
Only they have the strength and patience to endure giving birth
You want to know a woman's status?
If you don't grasp any of this you will never know a woman's status.....

I think of the moment,
The time, the happiness that was stolen,
Wild, thunderous and outspoken,
Forever cursing the wretched politics,
Forever replaying their darkest tricks,
Tongues as sharp as the deadliest sword,
Verbal massacres of my loved ones, enemies all aboard,
How is one so malice,
How are they so callous,
Assassination of every good character,
Who is real, whos is fake, ahh their character,
Hidden agendas in their disgusting persona,
They're awake but in an evil coma,
Tired and lies of their deceit,
I escape in the midst of the night, in discreet
Running, running, getting no where
I turn, they're there
The despair
Captured. They laugh, gloat and bark
Loyalty? Even your shadow leaves you in the dark...

I wasn't expecting this to happen, this wasn't supposed to be the case,
How we connected instantly, at that very place,
It was meant to be just a hello and nice to meet you,
But for the next few hours I couldn't take my eyes off you,
The nose, the cheeks, chin and smile,
Spending every second looking at you was worthwhile,
The way you stood around I could only admire,
The heat became intense so did the size of the fire,
Have you ever been stuck in a trance?
When it was only supposed to be a simple glance?
The sun set and evening came,
I put you to the back of mind but consciously kept saying your name,
Avoiding you was the only choice,
It's how you spoke, something about your voice,
I walked to the other side and went really far,
What's the point, it registered, I was the moon and you the star,
Again I tried to avoid you but your smile lit up the whole room,
Did we actually connect or am I beginning to assume?
The night was drawing to a end but I never wanted it to be over,
So we both decided to go for a walk to stop it from being over,
We sat on the bed and talked for hours,
We got to know each other deeply like we had known each other for hours,
Our limits had to be recognized,
For that moment oh we despised,
The cards we had been dealt with that night,
There was to be no smiles at the end of the night,
We laughed, joked and spoke about Rome,
The reality was it was a dream and we both had to head to our own home,
Our lives are different,
Our paths are different,
We shared strengths and weaknesses,
It was too tricky, just too many sequences,
Deep down we both knew we had to walk away,
We have specific paths so couldn't stray,
You'll never know about this poem, that it exists,
I try to block you out but my mind insists,
I don't know when or if I'll see you again,
This hasn't happened before so I'm back at the beginning again,
I'll remember you, for you discovered parts of me that were hidden,
I'll remember you for you touched conversations that were forbidden,
Your final words were, 'Thank you for making me feel better and changing my life',
In fact beautiful this also changed my life,
I gave you a kiss on the forehead and we had a final hug,
I inhaled and smelt your hair as we loosened our hug,
I lingered for that second longer,
Just to capture your beauty for that moment longer,
The door closed behind me,
I walked down the corridor with one final look behind me,
Part of me hoped you'd be stood there,
But part of me also knew life wasn't this fair,
Goodbye to our first meeting,
I think of you here and there, wishing for another meeting...

Imagine meeting someone who understood you as a whole,
Even the dustiest corners of your mixed up soul....

If I don't return let your sorrow for me pass like the wind on a winters day,
If I don't return wipe my mothers tears away,
If I don't return tell my sister her guardian will see her again some day,
If I don't return tell my father he was my hero,
If I don't return tell him I enjoyed my childhood with him on the seesaw,
If I don't return tell my kinsman I remember the days we rode together,
If I don't return tell my kinsman I would have followed them until the end, wherever,
If I don't return do not mourn,
If I don't return, smile, as I am not alone,
If I don't return be happy as I feel pain no more,
If I don't return celebrate life the way you did before,
If I don't return pray I spend the rest of my days with ease,
If I don't return pray for me so I may be in peace,
If I don't return tell them part of me wants to be back,
If I don't return ask them what if life could start from scratch,
If I don't return please don't live your life in haste,
If I don't return please don't let my memories go to waste,
If I don't return let them know I never felt this before,
If I don't return tell them to close the door,
If I don't return tell them don't look back anymore,

A moment, a lifetime
A mistake, a lifeline
I think of you as the day passes by
Like a star passing in the night sky
I remember how you walk
I reminisce how you spoke
Your beautiful smile
The wait was worth while
Now I don't see you
I don't even know what you're going through
Do you think of me?
Do you remember me?
Will I be your final thought when you're grey and old
Or will the sight of your memories be covered by a blindfold
The nights are getting longer
My memories of you are getting stronger
I was at the forefront but now I seem to be a distant shadow
My thoughts as I sit here alone in the meadow...

Keeping away from you was the hardest thing I have ever faced
Always, I wondered was this my life or have I been misplaced
Reality couldn't stop me from feeling how I did about you
And here I am again asking do I really feel this way about you?
Sitting here under the heavens with my eyes closed
Intrigued to imagine how life would be if our fates weren't opposed
Night sky, is beautiful as I see your face in the moon
Gathering my thoughts of you as I stare into the moon
Lying at the foot of this cave staring at the waterfall
Endlessly thinking should I write you a poem or should I just call
The thoughts of your smile brighten my day
Opting to let you live your life and stay quiet
Nevertheless, my heart fighting my brain, love and sense, it's a riot