The woman I’ve fought so hard to be.
She looks through me like I’m not there,
Rejecting my truth with a cold, blank stare.

Her love feels distant, sharp as a knife,
Cutting away at my chosen life.
I reach for her, but her arms stay closed,
Her heart a door forever opposed.

Love me as I am—before it’s too late,
Before my voice drowns in the weight of hate.
See me whole, my body, my soul,
But instead, you cast me in a broken role.

A bird whose wings you clipped at the start,
A daughter unloved, breaking apart.
Fading and fractured, yet I still plea:
Mom, why can’t you just love me?

You’re alone in this gamble, a loaded mistake,
Unless their hand trembles for your heart’s sake.
Two barrels aligned, yours at them, theirs at you,
The weight of the risk feels painfully true.

But what if their chamber’s been empty all along?
Their promises hollow, their aim a cruel song?
You fired for forever, they fired for fun,
And now you’re abandoned, your love undone.

Saying “I love you” feels like cocking the hammer,
A gun pressed hard against your fragile amor.
Pull the trigger, and you’re either already dead,
Or walking the earth like a ghost instead.

I’m a liar, a cheat, a thief of truth,
Drowning slow in my wasted youth.
Feed me your pity, a hollow meal,
Fill my cup so I can feel.

Lay me down in my bed of deceit,
Let me burn where shame and sorrow meet.
Let you down, it’s all I do,
Despise me now—I’ve earned it too.

Preach your disappointment, carve it deep,
Discuss the promises I couldn’t keep.
I’m not a martyr, just a hollow plea,
A fraud, a ghost, who claims to be me.

You keep checking your phone so you don’t feel alone,
A glowing lifeline where shadows are shown.
In the silence, it buzzes, a flicker of light,
Breaking the stillness of your endless night.

You scroll through the faces, the voices, the threads,
Seeking connection in what’s left unsaid.
The screen holds a promise, a tether, a weight,
A digital mirror reflecting your fate.

But the warmth doesn’t linger, it fades too fast,
The comfort it offers is one that won’t last.
A fleeting illusion, a whispered refrain,
You reach out again, but it feels the same.

What do you seek in that luminous glow?
A friend, a purpose, a place to go?
The ache of your heart can’t be eased this way,
Yet still, you’ll refresh, hoping someone will stay.

So you keep checking your phone to make sure you’re not alone,
Building castles in pixels where seeds won’t be sown.
And maybe one day, when you put it down,
You’ll find the connection you’ve longed to be found.

The stars have grown cold, and the night is still.
Cosmic winds swirl, as the end of time nears.
Black holes reign, as matter disappears.
The universe fades, into emptiness and chill.

The light has grown dim, and the heat has declined.
All that was known, has been lost to the void.
No more explosions, no more stars deployed.
In this final phase, all is entwined.

No more life thrives, no more worlds to create.
The end of all things, has finally come.
The cycle of birth, and the cycle of sum.
The heat death, of the universe awaits.

Yet still we ponder, what happens after the end.
Is there a new dawn, or simply the dark?
What lies beyond, in the vastness of space and time's arc?
Only the emptiness, will remain as our friend.

Do you wish to condense my fire?
Put out my flame?
Smoother my ignition?
If that is so! Then please allow me to let you go!
Walk into my life the same way you leave.
In through the out door and out through the in.
Living in this brief moment of space and time, I finally have found myself
but it is too late, the night is dawn, and the die is cast into the flatness-eternity of space
I'm desperate for my own private eulogy, words given to you that nobody else will ever know
it show's me that my love is far deeper than the ground you'll go under
You want to know what I have to say, what is on my mind and in my heart.

I have led my ship to shore on a distant island
I'm lost in-land made up of darkness and lustful seas
with my sense of self diminished to dust
my ship is all that holds me
in the womb of the ocean
**** me into deep oblivion
blackout drunken disorder leads to sailor-on-sailor violence
a shot in the darkness, a bottomless barrel of shame
soot on the bottom of your shoe from the ashes
of the burning zoo
abord the ship of failures and nitwits
we are truly abandoned by god.

My mind hath been stricken ill with your intoxicating spice
I still struggle to breathe as your gravity was crushing my life
I feel like I'm wearing a strangers skin,
I'm an anomaly to my kin.
Forever waiting, forging, lurking through unknown darkness
As the darkness grows I retreat into my personal ebbis
I scan the skies for an answer, why do I still search the night
Searching the great cosmos for a glimpse of her light
I have finally hit a wall, alone, scared, and embraced by nothingness.
Experience existential doubt before breakfast, checked off my to-do list.

I am a thistle
a single blade
blowing in the wind
feeling breezy and thin
cutting through the current
like a revolution against the sensation
I am free to grow until it's my time to go
and until then I say hello to my sweet long-time fellows'
blades we stand in the sun and in the rain against the tyranny of man's machine.

I listened to her oh's and ah's
a hard life escaped my sight when she was right next to me
breathing the same air, I dared to declare, my love and an honest hearts epiphany
I caught myself focused intently on her supple curves around her waist
running my fingers along her thighs
letting my lips rest against her skin
I felt a pulse beating from within
these stimulations of touch began generating at least in my mind, visions of a distant time
it was in the memories of old, our love was buried
along with your touch, so warm and soft
It carried me along the river of sun beams we both sail.

the dreary land is windswept by a gust from the west
the cloudy sky is a sign, an even braver wind is approaching
when the west met the east they sat down in a field and had a picnic
they feasted on the lives of the land dwellers
the feasted on the lives of livestock
then they feasted on each other until there was no more of either
and what sight I was to behold when the earth stopped shaking and the ground grew cold
I felt the winds of change
and they seemed to say
let go of previous past possessions and obsessions, the hardline connections to your past will weigh down your hourglass
revel in the memories but march up against the great meaningless hourglass
climb the hill
we cannot live in the past.

My furious love
how dashing you were when I caught sight of your might
how ferocious your prowl was on a night not clear
pouncing on your enemies like a game of hide and seek
your body was tough and your mind was lean
and yet, your love was pure, and your smile unique
my heart hasn't stopped beating for the source of your power
the gift that brought you to me in this late hour
the love I never knew better
the feeling of saying goodbye, hoping it never was forever
sweet memories fade, as my mind and hair turn gray
my love for you is still true, and your smile always makes me feel renewed.

You're like a shiny seashell that I found at the beach. You were glimmering in all the right ways, your light dances and shimmers under the waves. You were absolute in your making, remarkable in your sinking, your color was so vibrant and brilliant your reflected light shined into astonishing dimensions of light so beautifully bright, It was as if I saw through a lens of color and the water just as you happened to be there merely by chance. With ocean surrounding you deeply in the waters enveloping embrace. The blanket waves crashing above; and yet, so calmly you were still, you lie pure, untouched by forces unknown by life above your own reckoning, so unable to escape this beautiful world has now become your prison, the isolation that sleeps with regret in those silhouetted depths that you sleep with nightly or daily you can't realize because you haven't been up lately.
When my low dragging eyes caught the view of your light shimmer in the water, I was set ablaze with a euphoric child-like excitement. I could not resist your beauty initially, those colors were so inviting flavored in an enticing shapely way I almost forgot how to breathe. When I approached the ocean, I approached it on my knees, it was as if to thank it for bringing such beauty to me which had seemed so effortless. Love in many forms such as this are rare, we must not forget the love provided by nature.

An aversion to the complex conversation
a radical explanation of the common conversion direction with misplaced inspection
It's the sign of the benign revolution 
as a messenger of the end times, I make my plea
bring swiftly the ides of desolation end the conformity, end reprieve
the starvation and the political stagnation
with the eyes of a closed nation
nobody will flee to higher elevation
nobody with a clue will feel true emotion
nothing left to do but a clean brief motion
"Nobody deserves to feel"
but everybody wants to heal
the world has enough pain to suffocate the blue out of the sky

a golden balloon in the sewer has just as much value as the trash next to it. Its not who you are, but where you are that matters most to people

I'm going for a lovely drive through the miles of dirt, darkness, and fire.
keep going there is no edge as far as I am aware!
keep edging every inch
keep leaning off of every fringe
drive! drive! drive ! till the end! till the end!
the unforcertain limits! the unseen edge!
drive almost off a clif with words like what if?!
we will never wonder! we will always plunder!
deep in the mines of insanity, imagination, and creativity, I strive to live fully alive!

When life gives you a busted yoke,
make french toast.

Does holding hands across the room still count?
Do you feel my pulse as I hold tightly to your ghost hand?
Does the pain of one heart break weigh enough to change a persons heart?
Can love be as powerful during the throws as it is in the soft but cold end?
If love's end feels as heavy as a mountain, is it worth it to push?
Are you helping yourself or hurting yourself?
How can you ever know which does which?
If I turn your mind into a window, will you gaze through it in bewilderment?
Can't you feel what I feel anymore?
Can being composed hurt more than having a complete breakdown?
Are my feelings not allowed?
Can I look into your eyes for once, and not cry?
The fireworks bursting in your eyes, made me feel alive.
You have the heart of a sunwarrior and the brain of an earth sage.
I hope this poem helps you on your way.

You're like a shiny seashell that I found at the beach, You were glimmering in all the right ways, your light shimmered under the waves, you were absolute in your making, remarkable in your sinking, your color was so vibrant and brilliant your reflected light shined into astonishing dimensions of light, deep shades of multi-colored light hit the water that surrounded, down in your own depths as you lie under the waves of the ocean; you were still, you were purely beautiful.

Oil greed
Make earth bleed
Has a wide lead
Infront of the planet's need
To breathe
To be
Breathe me in
Clean my sin
Step away from our greed
The oil filling up your needs
Drowing the seas
Killing the leaves on the trees
Oil greed
It's a tainted seed

Humans jump in slow motion from one point to the next in such a cosmically quick rate our thoughts feelings and ideas begin not to matter as we are as insignificant as the jump from cavemen to modern scientists. On our human level that may seem servere, but on a grandeur view we are but blinks of life swirling on our axis of injustice and immorality

R.i.p. my lost queen of the stars
Break into my lungs foul being of time
Gravity is the anomaly that holds me
Forever I am king of my darkened space
Forever I am drinking in her cosmos energy
As beautiful colors spiral in and out of time
She is the center, the beginning to my end
I am her star dealer
She is my stardust inhaler
When we mix she sings of desire
Her voice is what gets me higher