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Mar 2015 · 188
Where are you
lionheartlion Mar 2015
Do you ever feel so alone or hurt that you want to do something destructive to the world to get the people around you to wake up and see how weak and painful your reality really is?
Mar 2015 · 550
Eeyore
lionheartlion Mar 2015
My darling has gone.
But I'm left with the sweet scent you've left behind,
To remind me of the time infinitely lived in togetherness.
All I can fathom is you by my side to drift away into the dream world.
And leaving my slumber to come find your bright eyed smile in the morn.

And now embrace and fade away from the world.
Mar 2015 · 479
Treetops
lionheartlion Mar 2015
He says "You don't need to worry I promise",
Orders me when the time takes me hold in the darkness, shall I get scared or anxious,
That imagery of him gazing in my eyes as he holds my chin whispering "I Love you" shall take over this weary mind.
He grabs my hands and becomes my strength as I hold on to his waist like  I have nothing else.
Admiring me because I'm "sweet and innocent".
He holds me under the trees as I tell him of my demons and aspirations to fix the world.
He understands the blinding anxiety I obtain of being cheated on.
He is my best friend.
Mar 2015 · 217
March 6.
lionheartlion Mar 2015
I see a woman.
A beautiful woman who loves the Lord.
A woman with a haunted past and future bright.

She wears the mask that I can see straight through.
She does not need to hide from me.
For I love her to the moon and back.

We have already been through the woods and back,
but nothing can stop the fact that you're my creator.
And I will always be your home.

She holds me when I panic.
Hands me gifts when I'm anxious.
Passes over advice when I fall astray.

Deserving of a crown so bright.
For she is the daughter of a King.
to mom.
Mar 2015 · 304
JC
lionheartlion Mar 2015
JC
Sometimes all you need is an immense  ring on your finger to make you feel like a princess.
I am a princess.
For I am the daughter of the King.
Mar 2015 · 917
Anorexia
lionheartlion Mar 2015
People reminisce of how she looks better now with addition of lbs.
But she loves herself.
The models they're skinny too but they're beautiful like she feels.
They call her anorexic and she aches.
She knows.
Ribs peeking through the canals of her back.
Limbs long and thin.
Did she pick to be looked upon this way?
Giving the models a hard time because they make themselves anorexic.
No, God made them to be this way.
Ignorance.
He crafted them of his own  intricate beauty.
They are unique in every inch.
She does not aspire to be like them.
As her stomach spins when comments of judge loom.
She knows that God too made her to be this way.
I wrote this to voice how ignorant it is to call someone anorexic just because they are skinny. Some people do not choose to be as skinny as they are, they are just born that way. People treat skinny people the same as people who are fat and look down upon them. And that is completely incorrect. People who are skinny are just that. People who are fat chose to make decisions that led them there. Just because I am small and long limbed does not make me anorexic. So please do not be so ignorant as to call someone anorexic who is so simply just born that way.
Feb 2015 · 436
Air Kisses
lionheartlion Feb 2015
A love story is not one that can be told.
It must only hope to be seen and lived.
Passionately in love within it's heart.
He is such an extraordinary soul.
Talented from within the creative marrows.

Darling you know I'll love you to interstellar.
You're a soul on fire, a heart full of passion, and a mind full of questions.
Eyes living their own colorful mystery of life.
Dreaming of seeing the entirety of every single atom.
Air kisses traveling so afar.

Sweetheart won't you please blow your babygirl air kisses from afar?
for Ben
Feb 2015 · 635
Labyrinth
lionheartlion Feb 2015
Jealousy.
Blinded by the fear of being cheated on.
Childhood creates everything you fear.
Including the ghost like faces of the people you once knew to be untroubled.
The feat of looking in the mirror and gazing on the same ghost you saw once upon a time in everything you looked up to.
Realization that you did not escape the labyrinth.
Feb 2015 · 869
Unbirthday
lionheartlion Feb 2015
I'm absolutely terrified.
Thinking about never seeing you again in three months feels like I'm saying goodbye to myself.
You've become a fraction of my soul.
Jealousy is only seaming together pains that I do not long for.
To see us go divergent for only because of distance takes away my hope.
Stirs together panic.
Time is the enemy.
It's waning out.
Mocking me.

Stay.
My darling stay.
Feb 2015 · 296
Dear Valentine
lionheartlion Feb 2015
I like to think I'm not too cliche.
But my darling do please pursue my dream of an array with beautiful petals.
A dream I've wished upon at night as I lay.
For delicate shades of red, pink, burgundy, artistically arranged as a bouquet.
I've been dreaming of flowers
Jan 2015 · 11.0k
Volleyball Lessons
lionheartlion Jan 2015
I feel bad for her because I know she's hurting.
But does she know how much pain she puts on me.
Making me think he doesn't love me.
Maybe I believe it.
That's the pathetic part.
Her pain causing the problems of my future life with Him.
This is not the love of a mother.
Who doesn't approve of her daughter.
Who she is now.
The person that she loves to be.
This is emotional abuse.

Hopeless
Dauntless
Useless

God get us out of this labyrinth.
Set the generations of past free for the future.

For only the hole in my chest is never going to fully recover with this madness.
This is not good madness.
The repetition of the flash on the screen makes my heart panic.
Alas it should be comfort that the soul encounters.
Jan 2015 · 252
Nicole
lionheartlion Jan 2015
Who is she?
The girl who doesn't fit with the rest?
She wishes everyone would let her be.
She likes being inside her little nest.
She used to think it was fun being different.
But now she finds herself writing about how she pains for them to understand.
Jan 2015 · 271
2:29 am
lionheartlion Jan 2015
It's in these moments.
When the moon and it's dancers are at their peak.
And the cow is jumping over the moon.
I long for you by my side.
Those sweet sweet lips,
And your innocent eyes smiling at my soul.
I wonder what these moments will be like when it's real.
When were awake with the sky's sparkles.
Will you eat pastrys from down the street with me on the kitchen floor?
Will you nuzzle my head and hold me tight?
I know you will.
Because it's home.
Jan 2015 · 298
To the Moon and Back
lionheartlion Jan 2015
Why can't you just love me.
Your very own creation.
I need you, whether you think so or not.
Just love me.
That's all I want.
Be kind, with your words with it all.
Please come up for air because you're dragging me so far down with you.
I want to make you happy but I don't know what you want from me.
Please come back mom.
I'm right here waiting for you.
Get better.
Just love me.
Do I even have a mom anymore.
My eyes are stained for you.
My chest suffocates for you.
My heart needing you.
Dear God please heal her.
Mentally, Physically.
Take her out of her labyrinth of hopelessness.
I'm begging you Lord.
Yearnings into prayers.
I Love you.
I love you so much.
I'm so far away because I can't bear the pain I brought upon you four yearlings ago.
It's not my fault.
But I need to fix you.
I feel like I need to save you.
Jesus please save her once and for all.
You weren't bonded forever.
Lord please unbound her.
I can't be happy until she is free.
Free from her mind.
God I can't watch it anymore.
She's so hurt.
Dying from the inside out.
Outside in.
I hate that her happiness has any correlation with mine.
I yearn for her love so bad.
The love of a mother.
I don't have it anymore.
These tear stained pages show that.
There is no bond like a mother and daughters.
I love you mommy.
To the Moon and back.
Jan 2015 · 731
11:34 pm.
lionheartlion Jan 2015
She said its that moment you know.
You've fallen in love for the one thousand third time.
He said it's the moments that cling.
Actions that make the birds buzz.

She loves the gazes of huskies at midnight.
And the talk of Mr. Edward at 11:43 pm.
Time moves backwards when you're infinite.
Especially when he looks over at her when Charlie says "I am here and I am looking at her.
And She is so beautiful".

Visions blurry but her sight is true.
Individual inward struggles but simultaneously fight through tears.
Your arms are my sanctuary.
We're home.
Jan 2015 · 371
Maternal
lionheartlion Jan 2015
I feel my anxiety getting worse.
I feel things were going to get better one day.
But there just stuck in turmoil.
I don't know how much ******* more I can take.
The blame.
The pain.
The crushing inside my heart.
Why do people blame me for everything?
It's not my fault none of it is.
But they all make it my fault.
It's hard to stay true to myself.
Why'd you hurt me when you knew?
You knew it would hurt and you did it anyway.
Why do people hurt others on purpose?
Especially the ones they love.
Jesus I pray you come back soon.
Save me from this hell on earth.
What if it is my fault.
What if I'd never said anything?
What if no one ever knew and things were still the same?
You were my distraction.
The good thing in my life.
And now it's shot to hell.
I don't know who to turn to.
There's so much pain pouring out of me.
Why do you want to hurt me?
Your daughter.
Your creation.
Jan 2015 · 296
Lost In This World
lionheartlion Jan 2015
How did I end up surrounded by people who need to leave this world to have fun?
Constant talk of bongs.
Lsd.
Shrooms.
***.
Alcohol.
I don't belong.
What's wrong with going out and seeing the world?
Explore the world.
Remembering what you're doing.
There lies so much more out there.
The things that I hope for.

I feel trapped inside my own head.
The thoughts cannot transcend into words.
I feel myself shutting down on the world.
But opening at the beginning of the light.

Why must I be so uptight.
It's not even my life.
I hoped so much more for you my darling.
That you would look around and love what you see.
That you wouldn't want those things.
That you would want for us.
I pray for you.
I'm in love with you.

Why is there pain.
Jan 2015 · 626
Young Obstacles
lionheartlion Jan 2015
I'm in love with him but I can't love him.
To be in love as a Christian young adult, that's almost impossible.
God says with him all things are possible.
Except being able to fully love him.
He makes me feel amazing and I love how he would do almost anything for me.
I want to give him everything he deserves but since I love God I can't.
I want him to just understand for a second what it's like to love God.
It feels like your very soul is so full of life that a fire will shine through.
The power of God is unfathomable.
If he loves me he should be willing to wait with me and in the end know that it was so worth it.
I love him so much and he doesn't even fully know because I can't show him.
I just want him to know that he's so quickly becoming my world.
That I've never loved anyone like I love him.
That just looking in those hazel blue eyes brings the biggest smile to my face.
That when he holds my gaze everything is perfect.
That when his smell runs into me I fall in love all over again from the memories.
That he makes me so unbelievably happy I never want to be without him.
That I wish I could give him everything he wanted and deserved.
I can't lose him over this.
It feels too good to call you mine.
I love You.
Jan 2015 · 229
You Scare Me
lionheartlion Jan 2015
**** it feels good to miss someone.
It's been a while since I actually missed someone I dated.
I miss his smell,his touch, his warmth.
The smile he gives me before he kisses me.
The breath dancing on and between our lips while the suspense of them meeting builds.
I feel this insatiable urge to get these thoughts and urges out of my head and on this blank space.
I love the need I have and want to be with you, the excitement before I see you again.
The prediction of what will happen, their are so many possibilities of images floating around in my head.
I've only felt this way about someone once and it broke me, but you're the first person I've really wanted to try for again.
So because of that, you terrify me.
Jan 2015 · 417
Urban Fairy World
lionheartlion Jan 2015
Why do I come here.
Where the frost lives.
The trees are in their fourth season.
Everything is dead, yet there is so much life in the creation.
I'm listening to the talk of Home.
It's so beautiful.
What you've done God.
I believe once you take notice in the beauty of things no one else does, you've come to know a new insight of happiness and creativity.
The limbs are something you'd see out of a horror movie, but no they couldn't be more mistaken.
My pen is dying and I'm sad.
So I guess now I'll read about the lost boys and Mr. Peter.
Jan 2015 · 252
One Look
lionheartlion Jan 2015
That moment when I catch him staring at me.
You know he's in love.
It's the way that any girl hopes she will be looked at at least once in her life.
The look of amazement and adoration in his blue and hazel eyes.
It's breathtaking that someone could show how in love they are with one look.
He's so beautiful to me.
This is a love that I feel lucky to know because it's better than any love story I've seen.
Jan 2015 · 302
Boston
lionheartlion Jan 2015
Even when we're miles away you're the closest thing to my head and heart.
I envy those blankets that get to be tangled up with you in the morning.
The pillow you lay your head on, as it should be my chest.
I miss those sweet lips that tell me good morning with a kiss on my flushed cheek.
The ones that compare me to sunshine and call me your love.  Always a million terrifying thoughts dancing around in my head but when you come to mind they quickly turn into a safe waltz.
You make the distance feel comforting that your love never wavers even 900 miles away.
We're strong together my love, that we can make it through this.
The hellos make all the goodbyes worth it.
Writing to you releases the thought of you not being here it's my outlet to missing you.
But God I miss that smile.

— The End —