God you are too good to me.
I woke up this morning with the ability to feel blessed and thankful for all that you are doing.
Every time something goes wrong something good comes out of it and you have such a way of making everything whole again.
That is the message of Jesus, taking a broken person filled with holes and making them whole again.
You bring me so much joy Lord and I wish I could worship you every second of every day with songs of praise.
You are so gracious, beautiful, forgiving, and loving.
How could I or anyone else need someone else to fill this void.
You will never leave me or forsake because you have promised me this.
You have promised me a bright future that will make everything of my past worth it one day.
I have no desire more than to make you proud of me and follow the path you have so lovingly laid out for me.
I desire to hold your hand through every minor part of my life and even more so as I move the mountains in my life.

I was weary and weak.
I came to him and I was renewed, refreshed, and revived in spirit, mind, and heart.
He will be there if you just come.

This is a letter to future me for my God:
I love you lord with all my heart.
I lack the strength I need to remain constant and to fight my urges but once upon a time you came so that I could be free in these struggles.
You loved me when no one else did.
How can I be so dumb to doubt your love.
Your anger lasts only for a moment and your favor lasts a lifetime.
I pray lord that you will give me the faith to stand firm for once in my life and stop this madness.
Take it away please Lord.
Make me pure,  make me clean, and whole again.
Thank you thank you thank you for your grace, mercy, and forgiveness.
I beg of you to not let me fall away again.
Hold my hand through this journey as I look to you with every decision and struggle.
I give you all my God.
Praise be to him forever and always, the creator of all things.

You're a disgusting human being how could I ever love you

It's been a while since I wrote to you.
But things have definitely turned over.
I think people write when they're really happy or really sad but there are more phases than that.
I wrote a lot at a time in my life where I thought I was undeniably in love.
Then I wrote about how that love was my greatest destruction and the aftermath was nothing by drear.
Then I stopped writing altogether because I forgot you.
Now the next phase.
I think I love my best friend but he doesn't know how much.
He's with her right now and all I want is to talk to him.
To talk about everything and nothing.
He's my person and I think I'm very lucky to have found him.
I waited to long too tell him and I'm not upset about it because I couldn't be happier just talking to him.
This is the phase I want to stay in.
The in between phase, where nothing is complicated, just happening.
Where things take their course and I just sit back and wait.
He has caused me to write again and for that I thank him for making me myself again.

B,
If you were ever coming back, now would be a really good time.
-T

After all this time you're still here.
Even though we're thousands of miles away our hearts still want the other and to cease caring has proven to be impossible.
I still love you so much.
It's a beautiful let down of a love story that still has not finished.
Come back to me for good darling, because you're the one I still want when I crawl into bed alone at night.