It’s ok to be sad
It’s ok to be blue
But honey there’s a time
When you have to move on
What happened, happened
It hurts
You miss them
But you have to move on
You can’t just sit there
And dwell
And dwell
On something that won’t change
They’re gone
Forever
Not just from you , but for everyone
She died
She’s not here
But she’s not gone
She will be safe in your memories
I know it hurts baby girl
It’s going to hurt forever
But you can’t let it get to you
Not again
You must stay at the top of this hill
Forever

Life is confusing and hard and I don’t know what I’m doing. I want someone to be there so I don’t have to feel like this every ******* night when I’m alone. Yes, I have friends and family but that isn’t the same as having someone there-there, Holding you, It’s different when it’s romance. You don’t stay up late because you’re sad and alone… you stay up because talking to them is better than sleep. I know that I have problems. I can’t keep people around too long. I can’t help it. I just never had someone that pulls me back. That doesn’t let me push them away. It’s not that I am desperate. It’s not that I HAVE to have someone in my life. I just can’t keep telling myself it’s going to be okay. I’m a ****** liar.

Everyone has a different way to deal with their ****
Some totally ignore it
Some avoid it for a time
Some dwell
I’ve never been good at choosing my words
And I don’t consider myself to be anywhere close to writing well
I just need to avoid my problems
Or at least doing something about them
I feel like I can’t talk to anyone
I feel like it’s just a joke now
I don’t think anyone cares
Or if they do
They are almost as ******* at talking as me
I just don’t want to have fears anymore
I don’t want to think I can’t talk to anyone
It’s just
I never had
Or let
Anyone stay
Anyone fight to stay
I feel alone
And hurt
And I’m scared
Everyone is moving on
And I stayed still

Depression isn’t something that goes away
The overwhelming sadness and darkness
Becomes a part of you
Everywhere you go
It’s there
I guess that’s one good thing
You’re never alone
Always carrying that dark cloud and scars
And no one really understands
And no one really cares enough to try to help you
Even the people you love
Even the people you pay
There’s an expiration date
I wish I could leave it behind too
I wish I could go home too
Not have to think about it
Just move on
You can say all you want that you want to help
I’m not saying that you don’t
I’m just saying
*You don’t really care

it doesn't matter
nothing matters
once again
i'm having a ****** summer
i didn't have any expectations
yet
here i am
with all of this disappointment
if you were wondering
no
depression doesn't go away
it'll always be there
at least that's something you can count on

i don't know what i'm doing, and i'm doing my best to open up to my friends. like talking about everything that i've been worrying about today. Because my best friend made me call her and tell her everything. like in what i wrote today "nothing" that's only part of it. like i've been freaking out all day. idk it's just a ****** situation and i'm worried.
i can't figure it out
i need someone to help me

i mean.. ugh oh my ******* god. i have never been so ******* confused in my life. i'm still a ******* kid why am i worrying so much over something that could potentially mean nothing??
it's the fact that
i have no idea what the future holds
and that
well
it scares the living **** out of me.