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204 · Jun 2018
You can see...
Lex Jun 2018
Look in my eyes
And you can see
All the pain
The tears
The hurt
The misery that I’ve been through
You can see
My past
My flaws
My fears
My mistakes that I’ve made
If you look close enough
Through all the smiles
The laughter
The jokes
The “good times”
Look in my eyes
And you can see
That it’s all just a facade
Hiding a side of me
That is just a broken little girl.
111 · Jun 2018
Scared
Lex Jun 2018
I’m scared...
Scared of the idea of being in love
And being loved by you.
Scared of how much you mean to me
And how much I’d mean to you.
Scared of being devoted to you
And someone being devoted to me.
Scared of my feelings for you
And scared of you feeling the same way towards me.
But mostly...
I’m scared of falling in love with the idea of you
To only end up being used and crushed by you.
95 · Jul 2018
Twisted
Lex Jul 2018
Waking up to good morning texts from him
And breakfast for two
What adventure are we going on today
Late night shenanigans at one am to
Movie night in with kettle corn
Your favorite...
All-nighters in your t-shirt to long phone calls
Dancing to our song under the stars in the pouring rain
Late night picnics under a pink cotton candy sky
Lunch with his family and dinner with my mom
Saturdays are for football and Sundays for movie night
Skin on skin under the blankets
Your soft touch drawing images on my back with your finger
My head on your chest and legs wrapped around you
A spot for your toothbrush and a drawer full of my clothes

Turns into…

Long paragraphs with overthinking
Trust issues to trust gone and no more smiles
A contest of who can scream the loudest
Bringing up things that happened months ago
Who hurts the most
She cries and he waits for it to be over
But when he cries she doesn’t see
Promises being broken and your word means nothing
Missed phone calls and one-word responses
No messages and breakfast for one
Sleepless nights with a feeling of loneliness
Pictures deleted and memorabilias burned
Number blocked and no one to talk to
Clothes returned and toothbrush in the trash
Five months later a text from a familiar number
Who is this

— The End —