He was at the local bar.
When he faked needing CPR.
He acted like he was unconscious and couldn't breathe.
So that a pretty nurse patron could bring him back to life.

While she was on her kneees.
But he got a big surprise.
When he tasted bad breath Chad's lips.
As he opened his eyes.

He had a dream that he was chasing chicks.
When his girlfriend appeared in his dream.
And started giving him licks.
Life was sure playing some sad tricks.
When in his dream he got his **** kicked.

He looked at her by starlight.
She looked so beautiful in the night.
She had milk and honey skin.
And silky black hair blowing in the wind.
Her eyes were blue as the sea.
And she was lovely to look at under the palm trees.

She tried to pull away.
She wanted to find a new day.
She prayed to the Lord above.
To let her fly free as a dove.
But she was caught up in the riptide of love.

Their love was pulling her under.
In her mind she pondered.
Why their love kept going asunder.
But she was caught up in the riptide of love.

She prayed that one day she would be free.
And fly freely over the sea.
So that she could be what she was meant to be.
And not be caught up in the riptide of love.

She thanked the Lord for another song to sing.
For another book to read.
For another flower from seed.
For the warm sunlight.
For another peaceful night.
For another person to love.
For all the stars above.

He wanted a Florida getaway.
But his bills took all of his pay.
So he bought a picture of some palm trees.
And a CD with sounds of the wind and sea.
Got out a few beers.
Gave a toast and said cheers.

He knew that something just was not quite right.
As he tried to hold her in the night.
She was so cold to him when he touched her.
That he got frostbite.
He just had to get out of bed.
And drink a Coke to clear his head.