I fall inlove with a guy as we grew together we grew apart,
I never thought as we communicate,
We lost spark ,Maybe its just me but no,
He dont have time for me,but for games he have,yes im jealous he has more time for his freinds but for me he's busy,
I never thought that he will gave up for me easily,
Is this the love that i want?,no
Is this the relation that i want?maybe
Is he gonna choose me between he'friends?he would
But no all i think is im the perfect one,im the one for him,he will gonna marry me
I watch my self drown in fears and traumas
Some day i will find a man that loved me and choose me all the time thats when i realize i always think about realations,being together and being not being alone,being indepedent,
What if i choose myself first?
What if i loved my self before others?
What if i improved myself?
What if im not ready?
I always ask myself.
Am i ready for this or all i want is to be loved,or im healous of others being loved,this time ,
i will grow indepedent as a lion in a dark forest,surviving alone,
I will be thinking of being mature like a Orangutans prefer to spend their lives alone hanging out in trees, only meeting others when it's time to mate.
"An elephant can shake the earth with its trumpet, but it cannot shake the ants' self-possession of it."
Like me i can take risk at my own.