For Tess,

Your gaze toward me, you say,
was first between us two,
I say to thee—it was equal!
For the moment
your glossy eyes
fluttered—oh,
to watch that first
look of you again—
I lost my barriers to you.

The length at which
you hold me
can never be close enough.
Let me under the nook
of your arm,
Leave me be there for
a while.
The sweetest place
I ever took refuge in,
it is here
it is nestled close.
If you are the nest,
let me be your bird.
I will flit always to you
and to you I do come home
again.

Soothing and swelling,
taming my raucous anger,
or healing my lonely spirit
You are my safe house—
let me dwell beneath your
robust roof
and feel your soft touch
to mine.

Naturally, then, we didst come
to be…
you saw I, and I saw thee.
As a pirate elates upon
discovering  
precious gems,
you too, my Dear,
I have found and treasure
near.

- A

To my Alice,

The first summer in June
flickered past us like a candle’s shaken flame.
The trees shimmered lightly,
the grass raised its blades,
the perfumed mist settled
when the moon shone.

Deep in the fields of tulips,
the sheath of night
lay His cloak upon
the garden’s breast.
I was there
I had wondered
in my lonesome,
is it not just me?
Who am I to be all this—
truly, madly
deeply searching?

I caught hold of something far off,
building upon my senses
until my self
felt it.
She was soft yet sharp,
marbled, yet refined
A tan-speckled face,
etched in dainty favors
To describe you as I saw,
Ah, it was you I saw,
a slender path taken
but boldly so.
You were as you walked,
and I longed unknowingly.

The illumination,
pure opulence
and oval-faced splendor
upon your cheeks.
You are like
the moon’s first peak,
the sunrise’s first kiss,
the lilies first bloom in the greenest garden.
And I wished I was there
when the world
bestowed you Her beauty.

- T

I've left my purse at home these past few nights
maybe because I wanted to feel lighter, freer
maybe because the air and my skin are one when I'm holding less
or when I'm held less

I am bold and alone since you left me on that beach

crunching Sacramento glass
losing my balance and not wanting the gripping thrill down my neck
my hair was haloed in sweat,
you'd never let the wind take it

i pushed my heart as hard as i could
and as hard as i've ever done before
i want back every single reassuring word i ever told you
stupid picture message
inside joke
fingerprint on your glasses

the ground was cold and wet
my face and the ground glistened together over your petty plaid shirt
you feel like everyone else when you wear that shirt
i bet no one knows how much more confident that shirt is than you
i hope you remember the way you danced
because i will never forget the lie i told about a cigarette when i left

you crushed me in a way that was your own
i hope you don't forget it

I'll probably be the only person in your life who sees you for more than you are
I saw that orange glow from your heart and I knew what it could do
I knew what it could do when you thought it couldn't do anything
but it could and it did
and then you ****** me up past the point of what was behind me
and I can't explain how I stood there thinking it was you
and wishing that I never let you block my view

i feel the wrong way for the wrong people
it always ends up like that
me, staring at a wrong face
me, doubting what i thought was sweet
me, at an existential standstill with myself and something that was
never there
never there
never ******* there
i just didn't want to believe it

I curled up into a song you sent me
I've thought about running the backs
of my fingers down your face
and how your eyes would find mine
I think I first loved you in the spring even though we were still wearing our coats
no one in my life is like you
one constant brainwave of you roars
through my head
and I still don't understand why
you're like this
my chest hurts every time I don't see you
my chest hurts because my heart is in it
I want you to have my heart, and my heart aches because it's more than ready to meet yours

you've captured me in your hands
and on your phone's camera
I never felt like this before you
there is no one like you
there is no one like you
there is no one like you
with you I'm ethereal,
it's all I can feel