Tangled endlessly
Equal parallels
Swallow me whole

Let me confide In your forgiving light  

Shower me in your
Compassionate peace
Hollow points

Do the complete Opposite

Forceful movements
Far from Graceful
Decoding the devouring impulses

Positive to negative

A chain reaction
Sends shockwaves
Bad chemicals

Like a slithering rattlesnake

Megaphones spewing
Conquerer of
Escalating dreams igniting

The call of life’s dramas

Heads or tails
Is there truly a winner
I pray in silence

Whispering under my breath

Crying aloud
Hoping my tears have dried up
Faking it tell you make it home

I’m all outta fairytales

Tired doesn’t even begin to sum it up
My head feels like mash

From all the overthinking

As I scrabble to rewire
The Bad Transmitters
Before my broadcast abruptly ends

If EVERYTHING in your LIFE feels urgent, nothing is.
Not EVERYTHING in LIFE can be a PRIORITY.
MASTER the skill of IDENTIFYING what really MATTERS & what is truly ESSENTIAL.
START putting your FOCUS and ENERGY there and watch your LIFE start to CHANGE.

Condemnation in cycles
A tinted self
My backlit canopy

Couldn’t shield me enough

Optical of the Universe
Ink my levitation pass
Cryptic skies

No longer a bleak atmosphere

Deeper in thought
Then ever
The scriptures I hold dear

Closest to my chest

Words of hope lift me up
I offer myself
Up to you if it will help

The way I’ve been feeling

Evaporate permanently
Circling the wagon
When will my sacred heart

Show itself completely

Bleed no more
Purity is what I seek
Path to the alter is full of obstacles

Patiently awaiting

My transformation
I’ve taken an oath
To remain faithful only visible in

The eyes of the beholder

Felt in the deepest spaces
Tarnished walk of life
The whole world in the palm

Of your hand

Yet you’ve profited nothing
You’ve found
You lost your soul

And betrayed yourself

All in the same breath
For what exactly
No amount of riches here

Can compete with what’s
To be revealed
A magic carpet ride

Bathing in the vastness  
No amount of riches here
Will bring a steadiness

And truer
Peace of comfort to your soul

Like that of gadol

Hijacked
Irrational thinking
Heaven forbid

Kinder gestures

Sweet amazing grace
The uninvited guests
I surrendered too

This bloodsport has

Spilled enough blood
Taken enough prisoners
Evading the trenches

Collapsed doom and gloom

No more harvest moon
Having it’s way
Time to rewrite my story

Alleviate the anxiety

Soften the blows
Make the lyrics
Speak quieter

Soak up my soul in sanity

Soil me in effervescent sunshine
Unpolished I have been
I don’t shine like gold

Few truly do

All the chitter chatter
Has gone to my head
In the smallest of increments

It doesn’t necessarily obliterate

Me to the core
Simple known truth

Behold the changing of thee guard
Maybe finally in progress

Succumb
Too the notions
Up for interpretation

The wheels that went flat

Yet kept on going
Proceed with caution
Sightseers all aboard

In unlimited numbers

They flocked in droves
Vocalizations hammered
They often

Tasked me in there dwellings

And hindered my ways
Intersecting avenues
Should I have stand pact

Put My foot down and just drove away

Instead I caved and parked
Running red lights
Like a bad habit

I couldn’t shake free from

Along with the falling trees
That fell
And blocked my paths

Preventing me from going forward

Dissection by default
My unwavering
Imagination

In need of some fine tuning

The boulevards
That threw me in there wake
Riding in the carpool

Lane was never lonely enough

Because my stagecoach
Was always overflowing with
Hitchhikers that wouldn’t

Just take another train

Sobbing
Past life persona
Feather under my cap

Nihilist guardianship falters

Sleepwalking
In sorrows
Squashing the urges

Never lessens the pain  

Un~ Masking the confusion
Calling out a
Everlasting calming

Total recall

Like a deer in the headlights
Faulty ~ Kinship
I might as well

Have been Adopted

Sensory overload
Maybe this is all obsolete
Crystal ball

Tell me all your ***** secrets

Curse the paths of my life
No more will
You rule over me

Who or what can predict

Future or past outcomes
Furthermore I rest my case
Holding all the cards

Close to the chest

Beckon of light
Guiding me in another direction
Rewinding all the tapes

And watching it all

From the beginning
There is zero chance
Of that ever happening

A life lived is just that

I’m laying down my remote
Taking my gloves off
Why would I wanna take

Another look clairvoyantly
Through someone else’s lens
Only to be blinded by darkness

Smoke and mirrors
Haunt me still
Guess the jokes on me

From the ends of the earth

To the edge of tomorrow
Absolutely nothing
Could have prepared me

For the likes of you

Forever wasn’t long enough
Admiring you from afar
Wondering what

Could have been

Picking up where we left off
Some things in this life
Are just not replaceable

A blind date

Nothing ever felt more
Natural to me
Not in a million years

Did I ever believe

Would lead to some of the
Greatest moments of my life
Taking a trip

Down memory lane

For years
I couldn’t bare the thought
Of even entertaining

The notion

The simple truth is
I may never let you down
Tonight I pulled out

The song that

Would put a staple in us
That has replayed in my
Mind for decades

Along with all the

What if possibilities
That we could have shared together
But the honest truths hurt

Me too much to ever admit

That I miss you to this very day
And there’s a hole in my heart
That will never be filled again

Ashamed A ~ Mistaken gift
Immortality in question
Straight shooter from the hips

Why lie about my feelings

Head over heels ~ Past tense
Life wrongly enabled
My Fading brittle existence

Passing on a do over

Clearly as The eyes can see
Devouring the ~ Sleeping giant
Blemished illusions

Leaving won’t be hard

Staying will only disable
Me where I’d rather not be
Trivial Isotopes scarce

Deafening the noise

Accepting of the holy truths
Checkmate no replay
Tenderness in borrowed amounts  

Effortless gravity

Oh how I’ve longed for you
Loaded gun without a bullet
Every story is unique

Has its own conclusion

As My spirit levitates
Up the elevator I go
Blessed be the one

My ride finally came

Like a pitcher without water
The hourglass
Has run out

Time may continue forward

But subconsciously
I’m moving on
Absent from the crowd indeed

Like A needle in haystack

Plenty more
Where that came from
This place will continue forward

Just fine without me  

Because when your names called
The time has come for you
To go home for good

Decompressing senses
Alleviating rain
Your the flame

To my dimmest candle

The quiet in my darkest storms
The earth shakes
And the clouds separate

Flipping the script

Far from seldom
Love comes
In all shapes and sizes

Gives you a invaluable smile

On your face
Specter you suddenly became
A part of me  

An~ Emotional

Frenzy tingling my spine
Sign me up I’m enrolling
Immediately

Process of elimination

There’s only one conclusion
Visually your stunning to me
Star struck

Come on in the

The waters just fine
From my vantage point
There’s a shyness

Yet it’s full of mystique

The heart
Wants what it wants
Aches for what it can’t have

No strings attached

Like my beating
Pulse I long for your injections
Unconditionally yours

If you’ll have me

Stability becomes
One beating soul
Let’s make our own rules

And let thee cards

Fall where they may
Perpetually
I am hopeful
It won’t take forever to achieve

Courageous beauty
You are to be
Admired and respected

Held in the highest regard

Judge and Jury
Blindly navigating
Braving the impossible

Prison bars

To Appetizing shores
Everything in between
Plausible cause

Didn’t warrant

Such unfortunate events
Freeze frame
Pretending moving forward

Like an adaptation

Somethings you never get over
Like a temporary crutch
Eventually they break

Stuffing every

Emotion deeply down
Keeping up appearances
Somehow pushing through

Life is unpredictable

The ebb and flows
Can surly callous
Somethings are better left mute

If could extract all your pain

With a syringe
I’d gladly take the venom
If it meant freeing you of all the poison

I would take a bullet

For you in a heartbeat
Trade places
And take the fall

Stitch up your incisions

And allow life to flow freely
With a new fragrance
Because you are so deserving

I hope time allows you to escape

If even for the slightest moment
And heal in a river of serenity

Howling at the
Deteriorating
Pale moon

Straight jacket fashions

Perishable
Fault of thy own
Readily life stops flowing

An~ Empty cover

Speaks blank volumes
Pages full of pain
Screams back without permission

Coming up for air

Somatizing
Expressions have
Negative energy and feedback

My body fumbles forward

Blue blossom
Days fully encase
My mental state

Needing a botanical garden overhaul
Physical states flustered
I’ve had my limitations

Cleansing my palate

The ambience
Of stabilizing colors
Shows face value

My complexions become aware

Dry Ink can’t talk back
One day my veins
Will not flow

Just like that of the pen
Which may have at times
Been mightier then any sword

My existence could have flung
In my direction

Swerving Bi-Polar
Future tripping
Hallucinations brought

Me back down to a harsh reality

A quick spit shine
Doesn’t always get
The dullness out

Barrel rolls

Not recoverable ~ mayday
A phoniness that’s spread
Like a hot knife

Through butter

Un ~ Clean
Gray and white Equals Black
The desires of my flesh

Aren’t mine of heart

I’d rather
Love myself unconditionally
Then pretend the masses

Ever cared about me

I’ve had a handful
Of true friends that
I can count on one hand

Five to be exact

Autonomous contours
Pleasantries are
Warming until

The Devil peaks his head in

I have to barricade myself
Up for safe keeping
I’m not sacrificing my

Sanity at the cost of another’s
False pretenses

Obstacles inhabit
The weight of the
World’s on my shoulders

The closer I

Get too the light
Thee enemy will push
Back that much harder

The creator of the universe

Heaven and earth
Everything and more
All mighty one

My security blanket you are

So beautiful
You’d never forsake me
Leave my side

There’s an aching in my chest

A void that
Needs to be filled
Hurting so deeply inside

Yet I’m still standing somehow

You’ve always been
Thee one constant
When everyone else ran

You stood tall hands folded

Head looking up
Blue skies gleaming
Suns shining brightly

Eyes closed deep in thought

Calling out too you
Insecurities hamper my being
Faults splinter my path

My soul bleeds for comfort

Far from perfection
A work in progress
Slowly repairing the broken pieces

That are scattered

Make me whole again
Walk by faith
In that which is unseen ~ unexplained

But always the one constant in life

Felt in your heart
And your spirit
Not by misguided words

Lies that are spread

In thee darkness
There’s always a light
To find your way home

Wether you see it or not

It’s there guiding you
Protecting you from harm

Cover me heavenly father
Now and forever more

Surrender the sun
In a world that’s
Gone cold As have I

Everlasting bliss
Allies unite
Becomes one whole

Clarity in sight A looking in view

A celebration of life
Angels fly closer
Breathe me in

Sleeping beauty comes too life

Patience no
Longer a virtue
Fresh ink ~ blank pages

Time for a change of scenery

Supernovas in my head
Open up the door  
To another universe

Where neon Lights shine brightly

Paint me a new picture
Worth looking at
Sing me a different tune worth hearing

Wishing wells run dry

Penny’s from heaven
Not sent
Between thee stars  

An array of colors sparkles

As there own
Free to roam as they see fit
Saving grace

Why have you forsaken me

A resurrections coming
Rainbows bright
Pots of gold at the end

Of thee tunnel

Grand central
Station boarding my train
All abroad one way

Ticket punched home paradise at last

No looking back in shame
Green pastures glisten
Golden valleys stretch for miles

Peace and quiet
Conquers all
An epic clam a stillness like no other

Colorblind to feelings
Inhaling bliss
Exhaling a calming

Arithmetic you solidify

My highs and lows
Enticing to thee imagination
Some equations add up

Seducing beauty

Belle of the ball
May I have this dance
Sometimes you

Know even when you don’t

Your hunch was correct
Soft delicate touch
You could never hinder

My steps why would you

Your mysterious echoes
Vibrate and send chills
Down my spine

Endorphin rush magnified

By a million times ten
I wanna bottle
That up for safe keeping

Put a cork in it
And put it on a shelf and admire

It’s eternal eyeful glimmer
All for myself
Like taking a long walk with you

And getting lost in FOREVER

Rolling hills
White water rapids
Night and day embrace

A 360 degree reversal

Of good fortune
Clearly rearranged
More assembled

Resembling more of a man  

That faint voice
In my ear brings tears
Shaking like a leave in the fall

Not as advertised

Let’s flip the script
The hollow steps
Beneath me

Driftwood on a sandy shore beached

Mediocre life amounted to what
Lost yet found some how
Sometimes you’ve gotta stop

And smell the roses

Acknowledge your growth
Many accomplishments don’t
Come with an award

But be proud anyway

Running without a care
In open fields of gold  
I’ve finally settled

Into accepting me

Tip of the cap
I salute Your brilliance
For mending my hurt

The best you could

A steadier hand
Guides my movements
Falling isn’t flying

In a stand still position

Floating isn’t infinite
Unless your soul is taking
Off for Heaven

Finally realizing that I made it

Dream weaver
Riddle me this
Why did you suddenly

Appear out of thin air

You’ve knocked
My socks off
Such a sweet caress

With those Transcending eyes aloud

My yellow brick road
At the end of my rainbow
What an absolute joy

To know that we are

More alike then you can imagine

Less hectic
Speed bumps traveled
Would have been more easy

To manage the hardships
That almost
Broke us apart completely

Refreshing tones spreading

Like lavender my
First breath of fresh air
In a long while

Encapsulated by your warmth

Intertwined souls dancing
Is there really
That much difference

Between us

Dimming darkness prevails
Unexplainable light
Flourishes In both of us

Astonishing doesn’t even begin

To sum up how incredibly inviting

You truly ARE TO ME

Status quo
A cross to bare
Marvel in your majesty

And tame the belligerent beast

Uncanny depictions
Sprinkled with hope
Laced with lies

Of the other

Weighing the pros and cons

Home or
Thee alternative
Pick a hand wisely

The shadows between the stars

Red clouds of sulfur
Cannon ball run
When the dust

Finally settles it’s score

Dual personalities divided
Who’s side
Will you ultimately pick

There can only be one

Clear winner
In the end
My alter ego whispers

Violently without grace

As my biggest supporter
Is pleading for my release
Purpose for my pain

Seems like such

A loaded heavy question
Passings in time
Circling back

Permanent formation
Settling right in
The current state of affairs

Is immensely gratifying

Decisive overwhelming choice
Victory won
As my enemy

Retreats because of all
Your glory alone

Foreclosure A
Carapace of what could
Have been came and went

Forgetting to Forgive

The blasphemy All of your
Borderline behaviors
Addicted like a leach out for blood

Spineless hypocrisies

Smothered in self reflection
The gray
Never comforted

Time almost lost me

A household
I wasn’t very fond of
Almost took me down

In flames with it

A penny for my thoughts
Endless ~ Vouchers
My House or horrors

The frailest of conditions stained

Without a care
For my well being
Traces of non refundable heartaches

Past the point of no return  

I’ve got a ledger
Full of receipts
Been to the depths

Of Hell and Back around the block

A hundred times
Closed off
You all became way

Too careless with my protection

Closure was never
Gonna take place
Your carelessness almost killed me

I’ll admit that on my own life

Passing memories
Like a fleet of chariots
You all can no longer

Be permanent
Fixtures on my screen
In my biased opinion WE ARE DONE

I have zero
Expectations
No bursting bubble

Only time will tell

Just the chance to
Know you better  
Speaking freely

Comfortably like riding a bike

To a stranger
In hopes of us becoming
A blossoming friendship

Lets see where the road

Might take us
From the heart
Expressing my thoughts

A peaking curiosity

Like kid in a candy store
Ready to create
Creative juices

Flowing in rhymes

Getting to know you
As the time goes by
Putting pen

Too paper let a voice be heard

Oceans apart
We have one thing
In common

We write and love poetry

I popped In
To pay you
A compliment on one of your pieces

But then the intrigue

Set in
And gave me hope
That even though

There’s a distance between us

That we can grow together
In friendship
And become the best

OF PEN PALS

Mirrored ~ Piquancies
Out of my hands
Not frequent enough

The bite felt around the world

Self infatuations

Abrupt melancholy
Receding Intimidation
Almost won out

Bleeding prisms no more shackles

I almost threw in the towel
And waved
My white flag

My own faults mended

Leading to my
Glory road tour
Unlocking the cellar door

I’ve come to realize

Breaking bread
Swinging for the fences
Now I play for a different team

My debt has been fulfilled

Beginning again
Let that corrupt vessel
Sail and sink

To the bottom of the ocean

I needed  
A new area code
The realizations spoke loudly

And a transformation began

Out of body
Experience
I woke from my stupor

Alive clear headed ~ Sober

And humbled beyond measure
No comparison
To where I’d been left for dead

I Scratched and clawed

My way back
To the surface
Longevity I’ve outlived

All expectations and then some

Survived the trenches
Of hell torches put out
Coherent speech flows freely

Legible writing spreads
Swept under the rug
Past ordeals bounced

Restoring order taking back
What was always mine
It’s all starting to make sense now

UNLIMITED CLARITY
DAYLIGHT
A FULL HEART

WERE BY FAR
HIS GREATEST GIFTS

HE COULD HAVE EVER
GIVEN ME
AND I AM GLAD HE UNTIED

MY HANDS
AND PUT IT ALL
BACK WHERE IT BELONGS

Sadness hardens
My heart
Searching for a soft
Place to land

Runaround and back again

Some days can
Bend you
Sideways and throw a wrench

In your spokes

Awaiting my destiny’s calling
You assist me
In ALL I do

Step by step every breath I take

Your the answer to my calls
The solver of my
Biggest problems

They are never to big

Scaling mountains is nothing new
Parting waters
You take on

My heaviest burdens

Constantly proving your worth
Please hold them for me
And lessen my load

Far too often

We fail to see
That which matters most
Imagining a paradise

So great and plentiful

Speaking into existence
Safer passages to travel
Hope for all

Healing the brokenness

Drawing a line In the sand
Making a wish
Without saying a word

Hoping it can

Come true and flourish  
Believing that  
Divine intervention

Will intervene On your behalf

Help heal the fragile soul
May the great
Messiah lift you up to thee light

Give you strength

In mass abundance
My deepest
Well wishes

And blessings a plenty to you

Take nothing for granted
Today may be
All you have

The unfair circumstances

Don’t often make sense
Talk about bad timing
A guiding light

May you find comfort in knowing

He’s always
By your side through
The toughest trials

And most extreme circumstances

My heart is heavy
And my prayers
Will always be with you

That’s a for certain promise

The unfortunate events life
May throw at us
Curve ball after curve

Ball to test our will

May seem so unfair
Hard to understand
In the present moments

We don’t have a crystal ball

To predict
The future with
All we can do is give are all

And hope the pieces fall in line

But sometimes
That’s just not the case  
Thee sad unfortunate

Hard TRUTHS OF LIFE  

The PEAKS and VALLEYS
OF THIS LIFE
WILL AWAYS BE THAT

In CONSTANT MOTION

DOESN’T MAKE THEM
ANY EASIER
TO COMPREHEND AND ACCEPT

AND ASSIST US  IN LESSENING

THE BLOWS IF EVEN A LITTLE

Binaural
The soft sounds
Eyes fuller illuminating

So incredibly~ inviting

Where the seas

Part and the
Tides shift
I know you’ll always be

Good things envelope hope

Come in small
Packages
No doubt in my mind

Love has no boundaries

It’s endless
Friendships evolve
Out of a simple moment of chance

Nightfall is quietly lifted

The Magnificent
Sun rises again
The air is so full of precious life

The spaces between us

Don’t matter
Let’s fill in
The blanks and grey areas

Grow how we so choose

Your simple gestures
Kindly warm my heart
So fully and give me strength

I know just how genuine

You are
And I will never
Ghost you the thought

Wouldn’t even come to the surface

Not sure how
Or why
But are paths crossed

For a reason

And I’m glad
There’s only one version of you

Because that’s more then plenty

To accommodate a simple man
Like ME

Morse code ~ A to Z
Positive led too
Negative spaces

Dissatisfied tongues spoke

Grasping for breaths
Out of bounds
A sea of fears  

Reprising preying mantis

Bounty on my head
Mania striking a chord
Immoral blindness

Blistering pale~moon light

Heathens swarming like bees
They ****** the honey
Right outta me  

How could you

Play Russian roulette
With a life you
Weren’t entitled too

It was mine after ALL

You’d DONE TO DETROY ME
Fevers high pitched
Like a FORK

Loosen your grip the stranglehold

You couldn’t let go of
When hell
Freezes over will

They find what’s left of you

If anything

Elusive daylight

Clock strikes midnight

Have my UNRAVELING

TENDENCIES

FINALLY BEEN

ELIMINATED

As I see if the glass slipper finally FITS

PROPERLY

Granted Initiation
Ritual that broke
Paths of unreasonable

Expectations the constant hurting

Fury conjured up

That become unbearable
Led to a
Hasty decision

I beg no pardon

Sticky bitterness
Dangerous dilemmas
I’m rid of

High wire juggling act

No longer
Balancing un~evenly
Net had holes in it all along

Will no longer break the fall

Pawn to my queen
Flaunting checkmate
Game set match

Bread crumbs that went stale

Straight to voicemail
A fork in the road
I knew my rightful place

And unfortunately it wasn’t

Next to you another day

Like a plague
You drug me down
Missed phone calls

I saw your number

And I stopped picking up
Knowing who was on
The other end

I was not the least bit interested

The conversations
That will never be spoke
Into existence

That got thrown to the wolfs

Like a sheep
Took a good hard
Look in the mirror

And ask your self why

Lost but not found
The unspoken words
Memories that have been scrapped

The countless
Embraces that never were
I’ve slammed the door and locked

It up nice and tight behind me

And My heart will not ACHE

A MINUTE LONGER due to your

Lack of Compassion and Incompetent

ARROGANCE

Far from ordinary
Extraordinary possibilities
All the what ifs

They make me wonder

Like a crazy tiger on thee hunt

How could they not  
Keeping me up at night
Shooting stars

Vastly approaching

Your constellations
Drawing me
Into it’s swells

Sands of time devour me

In your sweet essence
A domino effect
Is unfolding

Casting out my rod too see

If something bites
Inside sources mesmerized
Fast tracking

My instincts are rarely off keel

Surging imaginations
Running wild  
Dim the lights

Close all the shades

I’d be lying
If I didn’t say
That I am slightly curious

Window shopping in my head

Teleporting to you
Oh how grand
That would be

Forces of nature

On a collision course
Colliding
Certain things

Don’t just happen for a reason

What a coincidence
In the making
If the world

Stopped spinning

Would
X MARK THE SPOT
Maybe we met

In another life many moons ago
A face I have yet
To put a voice too

YET A SWEET CALMING

MAKES A HEART GROW FONDER

CURIOSITY HAS ME WONDERING

WHAT IF

A regretful path
Chose me
I would have passed altogether

A gained hopeful perspective

With time spoke intently
Too me and
Slowly held me in it’s pattern

You carried my heaviest burdens

When I was truly
At my breaking point
Stumbling blocks

Out of the gates

And a few races after  
Altered my direction
My centered entity  

Not for one moment

Ever swayed his course
The one
Permanent fixture  

Eventually the stars aligned

Forthcoming happiness
Was truly
On his radar

A process of elimination

Satisfactions came and went
Like the recycled mail
Outliers that never

Seemed to form a cohesive unit

Molding the
Scattered pieces
Was difficult for a long time

Valid concerns came and went

Unique emotional
Balances would
Eventually equip me to strive

I’ve stared death in the face

Of the many obstacles
Steadfast they tested
My will and faith

Rome wasn’t built in a day

Neither was I
I’ve had to buckle
Down and fight like no other

Against the obstacle courses

And jungle gyms  
I’ve had to climb out of
And carefully maneuver

Happiness is your choice alone

Evil and Depression
Will pry you open
Slowly and leave you for dead

And the blues won’t do you any favors

The worst of habits
Will ******* you
Continuously

Like a cancerous tumor

But there
Is a cure
In him and all his glory  

PERSEVERANCE is the key

Don’t fall short
Of your
Goals and dreams

For after all there is only one life

Here and just take it
Day by day
And let him

TAKE THE WHEEL AND STEER YOU

TO GREATER HEIGHTS

THAT MAYBE HARD TO ACHIEVE

WITHOUT HIM

Rescue story
An abundant
Well that never runs dry

A love that’s unmatched

There is no measuring stick
For differentiating
The desires of the flesh

Versus the needs of your soul

Even the most
Complex adversities
Can’t outshine your halo

The proof is in the pudding

I’m walking today
Freer at ease
All do to my sanctuary

In the most unlivable valleys

Of dark circumstances
You held me
In your arms

Back to square one

Ironing out the kinks
Pushing forward
Starting anew

Deflecting the blame

I’ll take credit
For some of the fall
But unfortunately I wasn’t

The majority

Too point the finger at
Winning formulas
Aren’t always easy to come by

But one would have

Made more sense
Had life shown me him
A tad bit earlier

Had they handed out

A how too tutorial
Wounds that
Glowed in the dark

What eventually became TRIUMPHS

Over my past obstacles
The demons fled
Nurturing food I began to taste

A much needed healing

Grace through turbulent times
A sad story
Eventually something good happened

Yet not often enough

Sooner rather
Then not at all
Better late then never

Spoken into existence freedom grew

Your words and praises
Maybe they should
Be far more to the ends of the earth

For you are UNDENIABLY THEE ONE

My testimony
Is painstakingly written
One hundred

Percent BETTER TODAY

ALL because of your ENDLESS LOVING FORGIVENESS

MY RESURGENCE is all yours ALONE

Shape of
My heart
Tug of war

Torn to pieces no longer

I’ve waited here for you
Unspoken
All things are possible

In what I can’t see

With my own two hazel eyes
Stand up fight thee
Good fight

Survival of the fittest

No time for wasting away
Seeing is believing
One spark

Changed it all

Life finally begins
Better late then never
I’d almost given

Up on myself

A life I thought
I could never have
Fully attain and value

Came to be

Landed in my lap somehow
Closed my eyes
Took a leap of faith

Learned to fly

And trusted in something I’ll
Never fully understand
And learned to live again

Redemption never

Tasted so sweet
Full speed ahead
Cup overflowing

No turning back around

Thee past is dead
Gone without a second thought
Or care for that matter

Living in the here and now
Never felt so satisfying

Alive finally free to be

WHO I TRULY AM

Sands of time
Flesh and bone
Bent but not broken

Decades came and went

Fearless one
You swooped in
Without anger

Ruler of all

Forgiver of sins
And wrongdoings
Freedom came at a price

Yours forever

Closer to heaven then ever before
Strong enough
To shoulder thee burdens

To forgive the wicked

Sinners of this place
By your grace alone
I was saved

From my wretched self

Is nothing short of a miracle
There are no words
Forever grateful

Could it be

I can finally
Feel my heart beat steady
My eyes are clean

My soul has been washed

Cleansed by you
I am truly in awe of all your are
I’m not worthy

There is only one

Never be another
Never duplicated even if they tried

Holy majesty never shaken

You are truly thee ONLY ONE FOR ME

Switchblades
Why can’t the echoes
Block me out

Of there crosshairs

Thee bright abyss
A novice I’m not
Scour the earth

With my hatred

Sweet redemption
Why have you forsaken me
This long

Fiction comes in abundance  

Biased opinions
Accepted standards
Where have they been

Wilted leaves fallen

Cynical eyes wander
Wounded heart strings that tug
My immortality

Is in jeopardy

Mobilize my soul
And pull thee linchpin out
The thorns on my head

Are far from a crown

They continue to consume
Pierce my skin
More like a curse

A wasteland of ruins

Heavy burdens
That I can’t wait
For the afterlife

To free me from

And dismantle
Me from completely
A tainted flesh and bone

Like a flash bomb

My blood boils
All I’ve ever known
Hopefully I won’t burn

When I arrive at your temple

All I wanna do is
Lose focus on what’s around me
And fly high into the heavens

Like a new born in your arms

Cleansing me with infinite baths
Of your HOLY WATER

Scandalous beauty
Rotting in view
Why was I always the

Sacrificial lamb

I should have
Taken an oath
To draw myself closer

To you sooner

Instead I allowed
The evil to wear me like
A sad painting

Soaking up my sanity inch by inch

Consuming me
Entirely to often
All my praises

Belong to you from here on out

What happened before
Shouldn’t matter
Yet it still displaces my being

Ball and chain

Breaking rocks falling face first
I never had a say
As I was blindsided

By a life I would have written

Differently and had
It been more decent  
Terrorized by

Meaningless tyrants

Like a sick addiction
It became maddening
Forgiveness is a skill

I’ve never quite mastered

And probably never will
My tarnished
Image split me in two

Mirroring a hologram

Left to pick up the pieces
Has never reflected well
In my direction

As I’ve stared it all in the face

The mirrors
That have broken me apart
Sadly to this day

Are the ones I hate the most

Screaming signs
Nimble imagination
Fear of the unknown

Faces of a thousand byways

Mental stagnations
On the back
Burners boiling over

Layered chaos
Far too many
Like bread crumbs

I don’t wanna eat anymore

Unbreakable chains
Grab the bolt cutters
And unlock my true potential

Your purpose is greater

Then any pain
Your could suffer
At the hands

Of the uncomfortable uncertainty’s

That stewed
Wispy saboteur
Unraveling seasons

The constant pounding in my chest

Feelings I could never shake
Riddle me this
The many disguises

That hid my true nature

Behind a Molotov cocktail
The cup
That pinched me into a bind

Outdated projector
Reruns spinning
Without a remote

A flash flood

Of disturbing images  
My clothes line was hampered
Cause and effect

You made the bed you slept in

A heat seeking missile
Gasping
For a longing embrace

Love is
A camouflage
To conceal the factual pain

As the facade slowly
Started taking form
Reaching it’s destined peak

I prefer the window dressings

I see now warm and inviting

Over the old ones
Played out

That finally got REMODELED

Who am I
Without you
Broken no longer

I give it all to you

The road to heaven awaits
Take the wheel
And steer

Rainbow in
Thee dark
Guiding light

My anchor in stormy seas

Still here today
Because of your
Love for me

Eternally grateful

Humbled daily
My everything
High and mighty

In you all things are possible

I’m not worthy
Your mercy and grace
Fills my cup

Have held me together

Throughout the years
Trials and tribulations have
Come and gone

The one constant is you

By my side
You hold me together
Save a seat

For me at home

Keep me
In your heart
Knowing that I’m not perfect

Your protection shields

From the hate and negativity
That fills my world
Frees me from my sins

Blessings abundant

Your water
Gives me life
Your blood flows through

My veins

Without you I’m nothing

With you all things

BECOME A VIRTUE

Motorcades approaching
Billy clubs
Violently swinging

My savior
Almost didn’t see
The light in my days

A better me

Problematic equations
Over complicating
The simplest tasks

Hurting the most

Life’s gains
Became my black hole
Time was wasting away

Two worlds
In a throw down
Collided as the battles

Raged on

Angels and brainwaves
Effortless breaths
I wished to attain

Lynchpin of evil

Is no leader
I wanted to follow anymore
Taker of harmony ousted

Brian waves fizzled

Leader of the armada
Squeezed me
From the inside out

Like a lemon
That tasted so sour
But now I drink lemonade

Took me a while to adapt
To the sweet taste
Of life

NEVERMORE will my alter
Ego rule over
My HAPPINESS

Dull existence
Tilting axis
Gravity’s lumpy
Lost in the backroads

Off a beaten path

Protect the nest
Don’t flock
To the fatal tones

The rooster mustn’t reign

Like a moth
To a flame
A lantern without a spark

My dark forest held me

Picking myself
Up of the pavement
Trying to avoid my

Chalk outline permanently

Short fuse
As my time bomb
Was ticking down to it’s last seconds

Absolute explosion guaranteed

Logy as I was
Repercussions never mattered
Up to that point

I just sat and pondered

If this had to be my fate
Why not just change
For the betterment of MYSELF

Embracive swells
Seismic shift
Tables flipped over

Jokers wild
*******
Had A ace up my sleeve

I wagered everything
To beat him
Antes slid to my side
Of the table

No longer does he
Hold all the cards

Removing sad layers
Brick by brick
**** it’s a chore

My enclosure becomes
Less adhesive
More adaptable

Locomotive on
Autopilot
Barreling through my head
Where it will stop

TBD

Park bench
Passerby’s could they
See me siting
Underneath my rooted tree

Life held me
Down like cinder blocks
An ally
To my foe

Knotted thoughts
That plied up
In the corner
Needed untying

The invasive thoughts
No longer trigger
My bad impulses that led

To enormous
Deflating challenges
Constant wars within

Pop the cork
And unleash
All your sorrows

Housed in plexiglass

Knee deep
In the times
That evaded me

Border line insane
Not centered
You reap what you sow

I’d rather be more grounded  

No amount
Of love here
Could seal up my seeping wounds

The glowing embers
Oh how
I wish I cloud erase them

Digging up dirt
Diving in head first pilling
Up on top of me

As I wish upon a star

Am I all out of wishes
Maybe one day
The agony will dissipate

Every which way I look
Starving for
Something greater then me

When will my shoes
Finally fit properly
Always searching

For a simpler alternative
To my mind
Of madness  

It’s amazing what you
Can get used too
A rugged complexion

That’s hard to understand
Resembling anything
That I’ve been unable

To translate into something readable

Intersections
Misguided directions
My hope was high jacked

Right from underneath me

Pentagrams
In the night
Hiding my deepest sorrows

Leave and don’t
Take me with you
Swallowed whole

By lies
And a weak lack
Of will  

To fight for change
Saturated in
Bad spirits haunted

By the days prior
Stuck in a school of
Haunting evil trolls

Bouncing off the walls
Frothing at the mouth
To be transformed

One eye open
While the others sealed shut
I felt like

Two souls trapped in one
How could this be
God and the devil

Head to head in a face off

Pulling me
In different directions
Caught in the crossfire

Glad thee right team won

Replacing bad habits
Took me to
The point of no return

Impossible to
Fathom how far
I’ve actually come

Stuck in neutral

I had to put the car in drive
And not look back
As often as I had before

Separating one from the other
Learning to function
Somewhat properly

Surviving me became the
Ultimate chore
I had to learn life’s lessons

The hard way

And it truly helps
Me to appreciate the air
I still breath today

Unreeling paradise
Swallowed up
Basking  
In shallow waters

A slave to
The wrong spaces
What I could never acquire

A truce between us

Very unrealistic
A frame
Without a picture empty

The sirens
Like hurricanes
They ignited

My vanity
That simply
Didn’t function well

What exactly was I seeing

I’d rather not recall
My insecurities
Got the best of me

Picked at me separated
Like a fiddle
A better standard

Way of life was purely a lie

Viewpoints quickly slid
Interpretations differed
Never were a true match

What I conceived
In my thoughts
Seemed unattainable

Never saw the light of the sun
Dangling
Hopes and dreams

In front of my face
Like a bribe
Only to watch them fizzle

Below in my wishing well

I felt more like a marionette  
Trapped in the shadows
That wouldn’t

Take a break let up

Insecure for a lifetime
Reeling
Scared to be

Wishing for a memory
That I could somehow hold dear

Crossing over
Erase the
Undeniable hurting

The story I fumble through
Constantly gazing
Through an empty stare

Satellites hovering
Waiting to be
Discovered

Passing by
In my rearview
For only a moment

If only I noticed
You more before
I threw away

The greatest gift I was ever handed
Slight of hand
Mischievous glare

You had me
The moment are eyes locked up
Your my harshest mistake

Yet my greatest joy
A one way ticket to jubilee
Biggest regret by far

Losing
The one angel
Worth waking up too

I tumbled into a landslide
After you went away
When that truck drove out
Of the driveway

I fell to knees
Knowing **** well
I’d never truly

Recover myself to any degree

There is never
Enough heat
To revive me from the cold

Shivers that run ramped on
My dreaded soul
Without you

I feel such nothingness
As the emptiness twinges
The echos howl in pain

My ruptured fantasy
Combustible commotion
Adversary’s are plentiful

Unlimited protection
The enemy
Is out to severe me

Your majesty
I’ve seen your
Handy work first hand

Decaying fossils
Put my puzzle
Back together in some working order

Give me shelter
From
The exertion that ******

Overreaching
Quick to react
The sum of all parts

Is magnetic

Off the charts
Feeling a bit off
My aim must have led me astray

Win lose or draw
Life can really
Do a number on a soul

Tally up the score
And you come up empty

Guidance system
Malfunctions again
A seismic shock

Sends you spiraling
Chain reactions only counter act  
Your balance

One rarely recovers
From certain circumstances in life
Sometimes we don’t

Realize what we have
Until it’s gone forever
Better left untouched

Overrun with grief
The hardest goodbyes
Will shake you

To thee core

Majesty
Grant me complete asylum
From the
Antagonistic events of this realm

Culling chatter
Un~compromised
Dimming daylight  

Sidelined passions
Juxtapositions
Wide eyed

Apples to oranges

My best form
Of communication

Is writing

Airing out my *****
Laundry
And it comes

So naturally

My formulas are
Unique in stature
Reaping the rewards

An inept understanding

To some

Birth of passage
A tedious task
Forecasting what may become

Certain views
When expressed
By a spiral of emotions

Can be unpredictable

A preview
Of what’s to come
Won’t always be followed by others

Instant gratification

Can’t come fast enough
A perfect posture

I’m far from

Illuminating ideas
Conceiving into form

The sweet aroma

Spreads like an inferno
A self indulgent
Trip inside the roller coasters

Of mind

They need to have
Those precise
Precious monumental gains

To bloom

Wheels are churning
Curiosity is peaking

It’s pleasing head through

Stanzas are slowly being burnt
Into mind
Like a fortress

And when I write

It may sound haywire  
But by stance will always
Remain the same

Right in two  

Till I’m no longer in the drivers seat

Holy water
The scores now even
Blessed be thee one

Thousands of tears cried
A million heartbeats
Gravitational pull

What I’ve always coveted

When judgement day
Comes knocking
I hope I’ve met my quota

Showering pixie dust
Angels gracefully
Dancing about in pixels

Life was just
The tip of the iceberg  
My garden of Eden

Pales in comparison

To a world
Drowning in sin and darkness
Time to close the drapes

Like heathens in a draining swamp

A clandestine palace
It’s truly
No secret to your faithful followers

Illuminating Arcadia
Eyes wide shut
Ready for takeoff levitate me

Harps and violins
Serenading my soul
Playing my swan song

As the pearly white gates unlock

There massive doors
To me  
Thank you
For saving a damaged wretch like me

ALL MIGHTY ONE

FOUND IN HEAVEN OR PARADISE

TRUTH BE TOLD IM HOME NOW

FOR ALL ETERNITY AND BEYOND

Pale complexion
Steps are fumbled
I pity the overwhelmed

Gorilla warfare
Panic attacks
Set in like concrete

Shell shocked
Out of body and mind
A Visionary

Quite the contrary
Living with one eye open
Asleep at the wheel

Dwindling anthems
Like walking
The blind to sight

I picked up
A book
I’ve read it a thousand times before

Non appealing
Yet I opened it anyway
Curiosity killed the cat

The ink ran down
The pages like
Spilling blood

Pictures tarnished
In plain sight
Like I’d seen this all before  

Life flashed before
My very eyes
Not before the fixating trance invited

Me in one last time
Straight into the
Eye of the storm

Vacant room
Guardian angels
Gone

Lioness is preying
My watchful eye is piercing
Unlock this spell

Gate keeper
Keep her at bay
As cold thoughts glare

Obstacle course
Is challenging
Variety and grace
Finding your footing

Reveries like
Fireworks
That don’t feel as spectacular

What if I
Roamed this planet
Alone in my mind
Made all the rules

The pinholes
Light couldn’t penetrate
Yesterdays episodes drenched
Me in
There terrors

Lived for anyone
But me  
Today’s a little easier
To flow

Still that little nagging
Voice stirs
Up trouble in the shadows

Steadily I am
Dredging my shores
One day at a time

And can almost
Bring my ship safely back
To port

What I see
And hear in this world
Often doesn’t
Add up
I tend to
Interpret things on a off keel

Rapid fire
The words just come
Out of
A cannon

My words
Splash on a page
Like graffiti on
A wall
Interpret it how you may

I’m not a scholar
Far from
Book smart
I learned more in the trenches
The school of
Hard knocks

We each create
In our own
Way who am I
To judge

I’m going to continue
To write
The way I see fit
What makes me comfortable
Might not
Be for everyone else

But that’s fine
You don’t have to pay attention
Most of you are strangers
To each his own
Be you I’ll be me

Sleight of hand
Diagrams only
Confused
The many regrets basking
In a hand basket
Trying to stay warm
A smoking gun
That never missed
The kiss of death
Our long fought history that stained
Ace of spades
It’s best to just let it be
Game over
That dog won’t hunt anymore
The sun went
Down on us
Long ago
And I realize
There’s absolutely no
Turning back zero chance
Fabricated you and I
We may be blood
But we are far from
A perfect oneness
But what we had
Was never truly genuine
In my eyes a made up lie
To help us feel better
About the true likeness a
Maternal bond  
The differences that cloned
Between us
My hearts bitter
And my walls went up
To shield me from you
And the sick and twisted games
The theatre you held me in
Like a puppet
I was sick of the hurt
The way you dragged me
Through the mud
I find myself resenting you
Far to much
And I don’t want to be reminded
Of you and thee
Hatchet that will never be buried
Between us not in this lifetime

Damning feeble attempts
Inner caves
Dwelling
Time to bury the entrance
In dirt

Trapped inside the
Checks and balances
Bouncing like a ball without air

Like the
Bad precipitations of
My inner sanctum

Flogging like a dead drum
Beating
Detoxing from the over
Stimulations

The roadblocks that
Imbedded
As the
Paper tigers stampeded
All over me

The vipers would soon sink
There teeth in
The closer I got to the light

A ledge would
Suddenly appear
Out of nowhere

Wouldn’t do me any favors
I’m a deep feeler always
In need of a reboot
A cleansing detoxification

The static electricity
      Dulled as
The sounds deafened

A bouquet of flowers
     Once wilting
Thrives in the sun now
    
Compassionate positive emotions
     Over time
Became empowered
    A foothold my strong
          Tower

The shivering shades
   Slowly loosened there
             Grip

Cages that once ruffled
         My feathers
      Now my bird flys
          Free

A sensitive subject
    To the core
   No debating that
Manifesting his dreams all
   Rolled into one
Hoping to one day see
  The light of day
   A truer reality
To finally eradicate his tormenting                         BANDWIDTH