I hate you!
Just leave me be!
It's over, it's through!
But you hugged me...

I keep myself behind a wall,
I never will let it fall.
I've tried so hard to keep quiet,
Secrets are in my daily diet.
I keep myself in a hole,
And I've grown dull.
Theres a beast inside my mind,
And to it, they're blind.
I can't let them know,
This secret is about to make me blow.
I'm in a nightmare,
But I don't care,
Because I rather hear screams,
Than be stuck inside of sweet dreams.
I keep on a smile, being a tiny spark,
So they don't know my mind is completely dark.

They say suicide is a crime,
But some don't live in a pleasant time.
Why must we be forced to live when we wish to die?
why must we be forced to hold in these cries?
We live in the land of the free,
but yet we're not allowed to end our misery.
The pain follows us around,
but we can't climb high and fall to the ground.
These rules force us to live,
but what if our lives want to give?
I enjoy the torture and pain,
for without pain, there is no gain.
let the blood drip through my sleeves,
for it's the only outlet it seems.
If I die, I won't care,
for this life is far from fair.

People always worry about me,
and about my sanity.
My emotions are always in a hurry,
and it's leaving everyone in a flurry.
To understand me, they got me something,
they got me a little mood ring.
Its always changing,
my emotions raging.
The mood ring is a lovely piece of jewelry,
but it doesn't explain me.
My friends say it's broken,
and when the seller said it worked, he was joken'.
But here's the thing,
its me, not the mood ring.

"We're not cut out for this,
so before we go, one last kiss."
You lean in and I smile,
we stay like that for a while.
We run up stairs,
and I looses my fears.
We stand at the edge,
of the buildings ledge.
You take my hand,
"It'll all be over when we land."
I smile and start to cry,
by your side, I shall die.

I scream,
I hate,
I stab,
Just to get me through this pathetic life.

I hate him,
I love him,
I don't know how I feel,
sometimes I image what could be real.
At first he was a shadow,
with a simple crush.
I asked him out, and he didn't say no,
And soon being near him gave my heart a rush.
How do I put this in words,
because thinking about him hurts.
He says he doesn't love me,
But my heart won't leave me be,
Within my heart I'm trapped, trying to get out,
But I still love him, without the slightest doubt.
"Ethan, I don't know what to do,
please help me loose these feelings for you."
You broke my heart,
I should of known from the start,
That a silent stranger boy,
would bring me such joy,
just to break me down,
and make me feel like a stupid clown.
"Ethan, I hate you for what you did,
and now I feel like a dumb, lovesick kid."
Please tell me this was all a cruel joke,
because now I can't breath, like my lungs are full of smoke.
you make me feel happy and strong,
but now I don't know what to do,
and I feel each decision is wrong.
and all of this was thanks to you.