Read back through the pages
Many ways I describe
My pain, close my eyes
and smile, hoping one day
Someone may read these
Random, thrown together
    words..
And find me inside my mind.

I used to sleep at night
  In the darkness
Now I watch and wait
As the stars haze
  Fills the sky
And Dawn approaches
Eyes still open
Another day
The city slumbers
Ignorant and at peace
to all the danger
That I see.

Holding up my hands
You win, you lose
You breath
Cause I'm used
And I want to scream
I'm in a nightmare
Caught in this place
with no space
I'm going to live
I'm going to die
I don't know why
I keep holding up
my hands to you
Got nothing to give
So don't take me
You could break me
Holding up my hands to you.

So here we are again
Or more correctly
Here I am again
Alone within my family
I can see rock bottom again
Yearning for the solid ground
I want nothing left to lose again
Let go of my responsibilities
I could start over my start over again
I see them watching me
I feel the need to bleed again
I close this door behind me
They won't be the ones to leave, again

These winter winds
Gracing summer steps
Aged spring sunshine
Upon Falls metal wall
Look ahead, these blends
Snowstorm in April showers
Golden leaves in August breeze
80 degree swim in March's seas
Walk upon this marbled earth
Stone upon stone making a home
Find a place, find a space
To bare yourself to natures soul

Please don't touch
I can't stand
To be touched
I don't know why
Something inside
Tells me to scream
No! It's not you
There is something
Wrong with me
Please don't touch
I'm not ready
To leave my childhood
I'm broken and shattered
I'm shaking
Can't you see?
Please don't touch
I know that sounds mean
I'm seventeen
Suddenly I think I'm three
Please, don't touch me.

I guess you didn't know,
That she wasn't me,
Just a fairy tale image
Of what I thought
I needed to be.