Plumes of smoke drift idly,
like the chatter in my ears
Signal to the barkeep for
another drink to quell my tears

The sultry glow of neon blue
stains my face and hands
I'd like a drink to deal with life
and all the sorrow it demands

The lipstick-kissed martini glass
by elbow, nearly tips
The girl next-stool laughs drunkly
as she turns to me and licks her lips

Her speech was slurred,
her makeup smeared,
Her breath smelled of vermouth

Right then, I knew
That not one thing
She told me was the truth (and she said)

"You're the best-dressed man that
I've seen wander through that door"
"How 'bout we go back to my place?
-Hey bartender,  mix two more"

I shook my head,  and turned away,
In search of higher class
Nodded to the bartender,
and dropped a five to drain that glass

My gaze cut through the whiskey'd fog
And then my heartbeat stopped
When I spied a lovely blonde
alone, and looking at her watch

I crossed the floor,  and thought "maybe tonight I'll be a man"
Kept on walking when I saw her
14-karat wedding band

The sultry glow of neon blue
Stains my face and hands
I'd like a drink to deal with life
And all the sorrow it demands

In the fading rays of sunlight,
perched atop a mossy rock
We contemplate the waterfall's
swift surging down the drop
Into an angry greenish pool
like some foul witches  brew,
Whose firelit froth, and boil,  and burn
our unbound, rapt attention drew
With pure, and endless thunderous splash,
like Heaven pouring forth
it's tears for earthbound tragedies,
we venture down,  to drown remorse
Now we stand at water's edge,
transfixed by ceaseless churn
With rumbling in my ears,  I ponder
pros and cons of my return

As Nature's finest gold is green,
'Till hindsight glows,  truth stays unseen
Shrouded in some candied lie
Delicious  then,  now noxious sigh
Smoothly first slid past the tongue
Spread to stomach, swiftly stung
(W)retch! the twitching soon subsidies
Nothing new,  now minus pride
Ponder trust, and life inspect
Enlightenment through retrospect

01.28.98

Drowning in reflecting pool,
I fall as vision blurs
Shroud myself in liquid cool
and aspirate my bitter words

Crickets chirp on summer night
and shadows cling to me
Stomach ties in tiny knots
from what I know's in store for me

I reached out for a star,
I cupped my hand, and took my turn
but didn't ponder consequence
and wound up getting burned

Like a taste of immortality,
then hearing that you're terminal
The crashing of reality
is somewhere south of wonderful

So give a contribution
of the eyes, unto the seas
Build the wall back, good as new
as dignified composure flees

Close my eyes and sigh away
a sliver of that empty ache
That's spreading like a cancer
through my chest

I think I'll chase the summer South,
hear wisdom from another mouth,
admit I'm now a different kind of mess

Like celebrating life and love
by going to a funeral
Feathers shed from wings of doves
lie somewhere south of wonderful

Any port in a storm, I say,
so take what you can get
Though tough to see the forest's  trees
when eyes are dripping wet

The edges, somewhat blurry,
and the forms are vaguely seen
While pilfered ends that whisper kisses
justify the means

For sunshine never looked so good,
as when the sky is gray
And all the warmth will stir the torpid
blood, until it fades

And bliss will quickly flee from this
like sparks from lightning's touch
'Neath hopes that never rose too high
but somehow they were still too much

Oh, take me back
to impetuous days,
When I knew how to speak,
and how I should behave
The flowers were fresh,
and the sky smelled so clean
The Earth was alive
as our feet trod the green

Then the sky split asunder,
and the plagues hurtled down
More deafening than thunder
was the clamorous sound
In the blink of an eye,
day had turned into night
And the moon turned blood red,
'twas the devil's delight

Faint for a moment,
then vision returned,
An angel stood by,
asked the lessons I'd learned
I told him of life, love,
and pictures on clay
He held up a scale,
showed my soul didn't weigh

I dropped to my knees,
crushed by guilt and by shame
And fell through the Earth,
towards perpetual flame
I screamed for salvation,
though it was too late
Mere mortals can't flee
from the presence of Fate

Enshrouded by darkness
with no ground below,
weightless,  yet falling
towards God only knows
The air reeks of sulfur,
and the smoke burns the eyes
The ****** fill the air
with their pitiful cries

Panic swept through me,
then gave way to dread
As I witnessed the ranks
of the tormented dead
The truth finally hit me
as they fastened my chains
Eternal damnation
had another soul claimed

Oh take me back
to more innocent days
When the Fey walked the Earth
and magicians amazed
The trees whispered softly,
and the streams babbled on
The rays of the Sun
warm the wind's mournful song

Tossing back tequila shots
To burn on down to blackened thoughts
Why am I unable to cast aside my old emotions?

While flecks of darker memories
Pollute the air in front of me
Never would I even wish erasure
Of the thoughts I've spoken

Maybe I'll just keep on clinging
Hum along with heifer's singing
Crowning list of weaknesses
Is failure to let go

Bob my head, alone, in silence
Midnight flight with no co-pilot
Fearful of the landing
Better shout 'Look Out Below'

Just play my music louder
While I stop to burn the flowers
And I shed my old remembrances
Like caterpillar's skin

Shreds of life streak by in flashes,
Must adjust my rose-hued glasses
Rub my tired, dried out eyes
To block the light and look within