How does one quit?
How does one give up?
How are some people rich?
How are some people poor?
How are some people suicidal?
How are some people not?
How…

You had opened up a browser to look up something
You were trying to look up “how to know if cookies are done”
But all you typed was “how”
Those are the results
Those are the top 6 results to finish your so far one worded question.

Old habits
They’re hard to get rid of
They’re almost impossible to completely stop
Old habits

Some habits are good
Some habits are bad
Some can help
Some can hurt

They say moving is “a good thing”
That it brings new beginnings
But what is moving isn’t always good?

They say moving is “scary but exciting”
That it’ll begin to feel like home in no time
But what if moving is only scary?


They say moving is “full of adventure”
That it’ll be exciting to see new scenery
But what if moving becomes a nightmare?

That was my case
I thought moving would be a good thing, a scary but exciting thing, and full of adventure
But it was almost the exact opposite

Everyday we were being belittled, berated, and talked **** about
Everyday was a scary event of walking on egg shells
Everyday was a nightmare

4 months straight
And I can count on one hand how many times they were both nice to us
But now the good, exciting, and adventure begins

“Show more skin”
I’m dressed in winter attire…
It’s winter

“Show less skin”
I’m dressed in summer attire…
It’s summer

“What were you wearing?”
Kids clothes…
I was 5 the first time

whistles at me
I tried to ignore
I was later drugged
Then I was blamed for ‘leading him on’

What has our society come to?
Why is this normal behaviour?
And lastly
Why aren’t the parents of these boys doing more to stop this behaviour?

But women deal with the repercussions…

Smell, touch, sight, hear, and taste
These are the five senses
Those make you unique
No one has the same smell
Same touch or sight
Or even doubt and taste

Smell
You can smell common things
Like pies and popcorn
But me?
I still smell your cologne

Touch
You can touch everything
Like pies and popcorn
But me?
I still feel your touch

Sight
You can see a lot of things
Like pies and popcorn
But me?
I still see you in the shadows

Sound
You can hear the same things
Like the timer for the pies and the popping of popcorn
But me?
I still hear the words you told me

Taste
You never take the same thing
Like the pie and popcorn can be good to you but not someone else
But me?
I can still taste the ***** you shoved into my mouth

You can smell pies and popcorn
You can touch pies and popcorn
You can see pies and popcorn
You can hear the timer and the popping
And you can taste pies and popcorn
But me?
I still smell your cologne
I still feel your hands
I still see you in shadows
I still hear your voice
And I still taste you

The five senses can be so good
But one person can make them so bad

“Hey, are you okay?” Someone asked me
I looked at them and smiled
“Yeah, Im fine.” I lied
“No you’re not. Tell me what’s wrong.” They told me
“Okay, fine then.
Im tired
Im tired of people making fun of me
Im tired of being in debt
Im tired of feeling like my friends don’t like me
Im tired of being in love with two people who seem to hate each other
Im tired of making ‘jokes’ and no one taking them seriously
Im tired of lying to people to seem okay
And finally, Im tired of living.”
That’s what I want to say
I want to tell someone the truth
I want someone to realize that Im lying
When I say that I’m fine
But instead of telling them all of that
Instead of telling them the truth
I just lie to them and tell them that I’m fine
And I insist that I’m fine
Until they drop the topic
Then they go and talk to someone else
Like they always do
Because unless I’m faking being happy
Why would anyone want yo actually talk to me
They don’t. That’s the problem
No one ever actually texts me
They only respond to me
And most don’t even do that
“No, Im fine, I promise.” I’d say
“Okay then.” They say, as they walk away to go talk to someone else

A lot of things can happen in a little time
A little amount of things can happen in a long time
All I gave myself was 7 minutes

I set a timer. 7 minutes left.
That’s it, 7 minutes

I clean my room in one
6 minutes left

I text everyone I love saying that I love them
Some answer
Some don’t
All they’ll see is that I’m offline anyways
5 minutes left

I leave my room and tell everyone I love them
They’re all confused but I’ve done it randomly before so they think nothing of it
4 minutes left

I go back to my room and open my computer. I type the entire time, notes to everyone
3 minutes left

I put it all into an email and schedule it to send in three minutes
2 minutes left

I get everything that I need, which is already in my room. I disassemble something
1 minute left

I lay down so that way I don’t fall and make a loud noise
The timer went off
I felt the blood pouring down my skin
I made sure that everyone knew it wasn’t their fault

I couldn’t handle things anymore
I grew tired
And now I get to relive my favorite moments of my life
In 7 minutes