Memories, I've forgotten
Both the good and the bad
Feelings, they've faded
To stop me from looking back

Words spoken
By her and I
Killed me a bit
Deep inside

Tears left unshed
Screams held back
Smiles forced out
Silence all through out

All those gone
All of them flushed out
Yet they come back
And knock on my door

The past clings on
To me like a baby does
To its mother, not letting go
Even when the mother has

Why do they come back to me
Every once in a while
I left everything of the past
Behind and I never turned back

I have started a new
But my past returns
To try and ruin what I have now
And change me to the fool I was

Now that I think of it
There's one thing that I haven't thrown away
Of the past, its embodiment
Its entirety, I haven't let go

A letter, a simple letter
A piece of paper written on
By the girl I held dear, once
It holds me back

I must get rid of it
To get far from the past
The question now is this
Should I burn or rip it apart?

When I went to that golden bridge
I did not expect to feel
A short yet perfect moment
With one I never met nor greeted

I was minding my own business
Taking pictures, capturing moments
With my camera, through its lenses
Trying hard to keep my interest

With my eyes, before I took a picture
Someone passed by
Naturally annoyed, I took a peek
I was taken aback by what greeted me

It was a girl who was looking at me
With her innocent eyes and captivating smile
Capturing me with her gaze like a picture she took of me
Leaving me mesmerized and my heartbeat skipping

The moment lasted for a second or two
But left me wanting it to last forever
And as she walked away with my eyes following
I felt that I fell for her deeper and deeper

It made me want to know her more
Spend a part of my life with her
And if worth it, give my whole life for her
Saying these words as the distance between us grew larger

"I know not your name
Nor the land from which you came
But do know you gave me a moment
Far purer and sweeter than I ever had. Ever.

And though childish, I want to say
I love you, but not as a lover
But as someone you mesmerized forever
And someone who hopes to meet you but knows that that time is never."

As her figure was drowned by the sea of people
At the same great bridge
I turned my back with a smile
Keeping the moment between her and I, hopefully forever.

Do you remember when we first met?
Our greetings, our smiles, our laughter
Hitting it right of the bat we became friends
Like it was fate that brought us together
Because I do.

Do you recall when I first asked you out?
My heart burst when you said that sweet yes
After having overcome my inner single-boy shyness
And you sheepishly smiling as I jumped around
Because I do.

How about when we had our first date?
Strolling around the mall like children as they play
Sharing stories and laughing as we enjoyed the time
The movie, the food, do you remember all that?
Because I do.

That first kiss you and I shared?
God that was a night to remember
Your sweet lips locked against mine
Under the moonlit, star-filled night sky
Because I do.

How about our first fight?
Do you remember that awful night?
I said sorry when you had gone silent and started to cry
Hugging you tight, realizing what I did was not right
Because I do.

That evening of dance and joy, do you recall?
The night of prom, where I took you as my partner
You looked beautiful that night, so much that I saw no other girl
The way you smiled as we danced, rested your head against my shoulders
Because I do.

Lastly, do you remember when we had to go our separate ways
Knowing that we can never work out with our present state
The love we had after all we’ve been through fleeted
Like the leaves in the fall, our feelings flew away.
Because I do

All these I remember, vividly and clearly
But now, you act as if the only thing that happened
Was meeting each other and becoming friends
You remember things differently from what I had said
But I didn’t.

As the sun begins to set
Behind the clouds, to take its rest
The moon comes out and beckons for sleep
And I answer its call with glee, and drift away
To a land of dreams, which may never come true
But here's to hoping I dream of you

He smiled and laughed
Like any normal guy
But his eyes looked different
Whenever she passed by
He still had the same smile
Still laughed the same way
Yet he felt his heart aching
His soul slowly breaking
And his eyes gave it all away

You don't have to give me your all
Just give me what you can give
And I'll take whatever they may be
While I give you all that I have
To show you that I love you, my dear
Just take what you need from me
And you don't have to love me back

All I want
In my life right now
Is to have no worries
To have no fears
To solve all my problems
And to shed no tears

All I need
Is a warm, sunny day
With a good book
For me to blissfully read
Whilst holding a cup of tea
To keep my mind worry-free

That is the dream
That I pray to come true
A colorful, peaceful day
At least one of it will do
And after that I can truly say
I'm happy too

How can I still have you when you want me to let go?
How can we be just friends when I love you more than you know?
How can you help me when it's your absence that causes my sorrow?
How can I ever look to every waking moment without your name on my phone?
How can I ever find the perfect girl when I lost you two nights ago?
How, tell me how, can I do all these things?
Without having to forget you and the pain that you leaving brings?

She asked for my help
To stay by her side
I just smiled and told her
Everything will be alright

I grabbed her hand, I held it tight
She asked me to sing her a lullaby
I did,I sang her favorite song
When I finished singing, I realized she was gone

She was smiling, her eyes closed
She went off peacefully, a silent death
She didn't say nor hear the word goodbye
It was painful for me to just let her slip by

I remember the time, and the place
And even the clothes she had on that cold winter night
That was the first time I met her, in an unexpected way
Yet, it felt planned like it was no accident

I was buying gifts for my family and friends
In a local store down the street
Down the shelf of trinkets and presents
I saw a doll my niece had always wanted

It was the last one there, and seeing no one else
I reached for the doll, ready to get it with my hand
However, it looked like I was not alone
There was another woman, who wanted it as well.

Being the man that I was, I let her take it
She told me it's mine, but I insisted she take it
Not wanting to feel guilty, she asked me to dinner
To repay me for giving her the doll we both wanted

I was hesitant at first, but I gave in
She was happy with my reply, joyful even
I just smiled, I realized how beautiful she was
We found a restaurant, and hastily went in

We talked the whole night, like friends reunited
When in truth, we had just met by accident
Annie was her name, and I never forgot it
The night passed by with us talking and laughing

I felt weird, not knowing what it was
It wasn't bad, it was actually the best feeling I've ever had
We had to part, as the night grew deep
But not before I asked for another time for us to meet

Weeks passed by, she and I just fell
For each other, not noticing at first
But slowly we realized our feelings for each other
And at the same time, confessed our love for one another

I was happy that time
Happier than I have ever been in my entire life
But unfortunately, the universe had other plans for me
And also for my dear sweet Annie.

About a year after we first met
On her way to the restaurant we had set
For a date to celebrate the day we met
She met a horrible and tragic accident

She was ran over by a car that lost control
Due to the wet, slippery road
And came speeding towards her direction
Soon screams and sirens were heard

I was contacted by her mother of what had taken place
And told me Annie was in a critical state
I frantically asked where she was now
I heard hospital, there was only one in town

I rushed to her, wanting to see if she's okay
I got to her room, everything seemed alright
I saw the doctor, and asked if she's fine
He just pat my shoulder, and gave off a sigh

I went to her and slowly stroked her hair
Waiting for her to wake up, or show signs she's still there
She did, and she gave a weak smile
And shed a single tear that slid down her eye

She asked for my help
To stay by her side
I just smiled and told her
Everything will be alright
But now, I know that I had lied

Let these be my last
Words to mark my fate
Of a life filled with unfinished businesses
And unfulfilled dreams
Climaxed by my descent to insanity
Ended by the last of my breaths

I can’t sleep at night
Nor can I eat alright
In fact, anything I try to do
All end up undone

Every night I desperately try to sleep
Every time the dawn comes to shine its light on me
I feel uneasy, weak, and weary
Yet my senses are always on the ready

I am not sure of what continuously haunts
My soul as I continue to miserably live on
What cruelty have I done to deserve this fate?
And suffer in every minute of every day

This all started when I had done
That one deed that needed to be done
To save my life and continue to breath
The air of life and the lively feeling

You may ask what deed it is I speak of
Very well, I will tell you my tale
If you promise that you will never tell this to anybody
No living soul, other than you and me

Do you accept? Very well
Here is my story, I hope you’re ready

It was a cool, lovely evening
With the air refreshing as can be
The sound of merriment filled the streets
Coming from the filthy pubs and inns

My love, who’s name I cannot say
For it is too lovely for any mortal’s mouth
To say and speak in any way
Not because I forgot it the very next day

We were walking down the streets that night
Enjoying ourselves for the success of my fight
I cheated, yes, but it was a victory nonetheless
And so we were out having fun with what we had

It was late in the evening, almost midnight I recall
I got drunk from all the drinking I had done
And so my love and I started our way home
To continue our celebration under sheets and robes

On our way home, with the streets so empty
I saw men coming our way, and they looked shady
Yet with the *** I chugged, I did not realize their presence
Until it was too late and they had started their way

We were taken to a dark, stinky alley
Where they beat me up and stole all my money
My love, still beautiful even while crying
She just looked at me with her eyes sparkling

After they were done with me, they set their sights
On the woman I love, and turned to me with a smile
The shady fellows cut her clothes and gawked at the scene
My lover, undressed, with all her splendor and glory

They started their nasty ways with her temple
Defiled it with their swords and disgusting words
I stood up, having come to my senses
How you ask? They knocked me to my senses

As I watched them violate the one I held dear
I feared for my life and slowly backed off
As I watched them have their way and just looked back
I limped for my life, with my lover’s screams filling my ears

That is my tale, young lad, it is done
The rest of it is too much for you,I take it
Perhaps another day, when you grow older
Although I doubt I’d still live with my condition

Say, why do you look so furious?
Like a lion ready to maul its prey to death
And eat it up after having its ****
Only that you’d **** me with that sword of yours instead

Ah, so that’s why you looked familiar
You’re her brother, Lan, aren’t you?
Mad at me leaving your sister dead and slaughtered?
If it were you in the same place, you would’ve also been a coward

But you know what, I think you had just helped
Me to realize that sin that I have committed
To suffer this lifeless, fearful, life that torments me every day
And now I can die in peace, in your hands nonetheless

Come now, stab me through the heart and with it be done
Or would you rather slash and dismember me limb from limb?
Your vengeance sated, my actions be punished, either way
Replace my curse with the punishment of eternal hell

You have done well, Lan, I thank you
For ending my curse and starting anew
I'll be off now, but hear out my last words
I still love Janie, I'm sorry she loved me too

To live life without
Any self doubt
Is the key to a life
That’s promising and bright

But as much want as there is
To fulfill this and live life with bliss
It will take more than just thoughts
More than words to get what you want

Hypocritical it is for me, I know
To write these words and have nothing to show
I’m weak, a coward, spineless at most
Who does nothing but mope around and sulk

I hate myself for this
I truly honestly do
I can’t help it, it’s in my nature
To be useless, to be shrewd

But knowing this, I have to make up
For all the disappointment I put up
By giving these words of wisdom I never acted on
For others to see, and do what I have not done

You closed the door
But I kept knocking
You paid no heed
To my constant calling

You went away
And left me behind
But I didn't go on my own way
I waited for you night and day

You turned off the lights
And left me in the dark
I stayed and wandered around the room
Trusting you'd turn the lights back on

All these you did to me
Yet I never grew tired
Of the all the despair you brought to me
Through all your acts and unspoken words

The truth is I pray for the day
That I will stop knocking and walk away
That I will turn around and go the other way
That I will turn the lights back on myself

I truly feel this way
But for now, I can take some more
Because for me, all that you are
Is someone worth waiting and suffering for

Just like the how the moon changes its face
I might change the way I treat you each day
But even with this ****** fault of mine
Never forget this fact, engrave it on your mind
That my love for you will never die
Always and forever, it will never die

Ever get the feeling?
That you just want to give up?
That you just want to lie down on a field of grass,
And give everything up?

The time that you just can’t take,
All the challenges that come your way,
Meant to bring you down as you go on,
And get you nearer to the point you’ll break.

Even when you give it your best.
Even though you give it your all.
Even if you face all obstacles head on,
More will rise that are more capable of making you fall.

I, for one, have felt this feeling.
Day after day, I was always thinking.
Of running away from all my problems.
Thinking that through that they’ll all go away.

All my life I had thought this was the best escape
To run away, was the most logical solution
At first, it was easy to maintain
To pretend like the problems never came

But as time passed by I saw my fault
Running away never solved what I fought
The challenges I fled from grew bigger
And I was forced to face it head on

That’s when I learned to never back down
To never turn the other cheek
That I must face my problems with chin held high
To make sure it’s solved before I lay down, rot and die

There is no off switch
To how and why I love you
Love does not work like that
I can't just flip the switch
And expect it to be gone

I can let it burn though
Like a fire in the night
It will only burn, and I have to decide
Whether to feed it more wood to stay alight
Or just watch it weaken and die.

I chose the former.

I loved you.
But I stopped because.
I always thought I never had a chance,
To be with you as life passes by.
To wake up in bed with you by my side,
To go through thick and thin and see you smile,
To cherish every moment shared by you and I,
I gave all these up.
I threw away every single one of these thoughts,
The fear of you leaving me behind,
The thought of you leaving my side,
The sight of another man in your arms,
Thinking that all these may happen.
Pain flushed through my heart.
Foolish I was to believe in it.
It was all a mistake.
Leaving you without saying a word,
I thought it was the best for all.
Now from the bottom to the top, read it once more

You are my Robin
Yes, my Robin
The girl I can never
Give up on, ever

You are that someone
That I saw in the middle
A crowded room
With a smile that caught me

You are the one
That made me believe
That there will always be a chance
Whenever there's a will

You are the one
That will get me
To steal from a restaurant
A blue french horn for you to be happy

You are the girl
That will make me
Love other girls
Subconsciously halfheartedly

You are the friend
That will stick by me
And the one I would choose
Over the girl who wants to marry me

You are the love
That I will let go bitterly
To a friend who I know
Can make you smile brightly

You are the past
I can never get rid of
That will forever haunt me
And never let my heart sleep

You are the one
That will spoil me
Ruin all others
With the love we had briefly

Yes, you're my Robin
The girl of my dreams made true
You are the one I will forever love
The one that will always pull me through

And even though I accept my fate
Of forever loving you every single day
I know in my heart that I will never be
The Ted with whom you were meant to be

The moment he met the girl of his dreams
Was the time that his pen ran out of ink
Every moment he saw her smile so wide
The paper made it hard for him to write
When he held her hand and held it tight
His hands weren’t free to write one more rhyme
But when she hugged him and for the last time said goodbye
He sighed, sat down, and his sadness he began write

Every tick that my watch makes
I will remember
Every moment by your side
I will happily savor

Even if it only ends in a second
I will cherish the memory
Made with you in that single second
It will last in me forever

I have no right to ask for more
Time with you anymore
So I'll keep every second with you
And never lose them unlike how I lost you

Let me be the first
To close my eyes and go to sleep
To see you in my dreams sooner than now
And get me a sleep worthy for kings
A slumber which can never come true
Until the time comes that you're with me

Numb to pain
Dead to life
Blind to the light
For you I sigh
A soul in search
For meaning in life
Must stop and listen
To the sound of love
And a life without plight

It's been dark lately
I'm surrounded at all sides
All I ask for honestly
Is one spark of light
To get me through the worst ahead
To keep the last bits of sanity I have left
I don't care if it's just a glimpse
Nor if that spark is the last I will see
That one spark of light I yearn to spot
Is enough to keep me going, smiling with glee
Through an endless stroll across the dark cobble street
Illuminating the pitch black darkness of the night
As long as I see and catch that spark of light
Just one, final spark of light will suffice
It will shine for an eternity and a lifetime

He's been out for a while now
Roaming the woods beyond the walls
Angered by his fellowmen's betrayal
After they drove him out into exile

They closed the gates behind him
And left him all alone
No one to help nor care for him
Loneliness he always hated, now his friend

From above a hill, he usually saw
Over the walls, his people happy and unworried
"All those smiles are because of me,
and this is how they repay me?" he said to himself

He vowed to himself one cold hearted thing
To seize the chance for him to come back in
And make them all suffer, as he did their enemies
With the same means he used, ones they hated but needed

His exile was for all the cruelty and pain he conjured
Against the enemies his people long feared
He was the necessary evil they clung unto reluctantly
The savior they feared, more than they did their enemies

Days, months, and years passed by
And he continued to watch them day and night
All were happy, happier than each passing day in fact
Until one day, everything fell into the man's foretold fate
.
The people were frantic and in despair
He knew not what was happening there
But even so, he saw his chance has opened
And smiled as he went and make true his return

The Exiled, that's what he chose
To name himself for his return
Expecting fear to overtake the whole place
He was ecstatic to start the slaughter he savored since that day

The gates were open, just as he expected
He walked right in, giving off the same presence
He had emanated when he went out the gates
And expected the people to wallow in fear and hopelessness

What he saw was one he never imagined
They all saw him and asked for his forgiveness
They asked for his help, and offered their allegiance
He was no longer to be only their savior, but their king as well

The Exiled was shocked at the reception he received
Taken aback, confused and not knowing how to react
Until he thought of what he was given
And laughed menacingly, like those of the battles of old

He saw the chance to put out all the pain he felt
After being exiled before, and now he's back
To fully control the people who chained him with weakness
And free to do whatever he wickedly wishes

I know not what I did
For you to act as if
I'm a ghost with no voice
A stranger in the night
But even with this in mind
I will never raise the flag
Until you say the words
That signify my defeat
I will never say I quit
Until you ask me to say I will

I need to write
Write like never before
To let all my burdens go
To clear my mind, and to let tears flow
And lighten my heart for the morrow