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Awnaeji Aug 18
I smile.
Too steady. Too still.
Inside...
thunder clawing at my ribs.

You laugh with her.
Sweet. Too sweet.
Not mine.
I go quiet.

Ghost in the corner.
Hands folded—burning.
The words rise—
I want that. For me. Only me.

But I choke.
And silence wins.
Again.
A silent lover—someone consumed by unspoken desire, jealousy, and aching restraint. They want to claim the person they love, but fear, pride, or circumstance chains their voice.
56 · Jul 23
It Had to Be Me
Awnaeji Jul 23
There are some things we must go through,
A road of pain to lead us true.
We need to fall, we need to feel,
For wounds, in time, will help us heal.

Feel the ache, the sharp betrayals,
The silent cries, the dream denials.
The loss that shakes your very core,
The questions knocking at your door.

“Why of all, does it have to be me?”
A soul just longing to be free.
Why must I carry such heavy rain,
Drenched in sorrow, steeped in pain?

But in the dark where hope is thin,
A deeper strength begins within.
Scars will form, but they will guide
A story etched you cannot hide.

Some storms arrive not to destroy,
But to clear the way, renew your joy.
And though the night may stretch too long,
It shapes your soul, it makes you strong.

So let the tears fall if they must,
From shattered dreams and broken trust.
For every cry, a seed is sown,
That one day blooms when you’ve grown.

And when the dawn breaks soft and bright,
You’ll see your path bathed in new light.
And whisper gently, wild and free,
"It had to hurt... it had to be me."
Sometimes the pain we go through is the path to who we’re meant to become.  Let it shape you, not break you.

— The End —