Chaos and disaster
Right on front of our eyes
They dont want you to see it
They dont want us to defeat it
This is all in their favour
Not for ours
Keep your eyes open
We have to see the problem to change it
Keep your eyes open

Love isn't supposed to hurt

My face in the mirror
Bruised, swollen and unrecognizable
I keep telling myself you care
Every blooming bruise
Followed by another 'i love you'
Every hit and punch
Followed by the softest caress
Every insult spat at me
Followed by beatiful flowers
Love isn't supposed to hurt
Yet the smallest acts of love makes me stay
I love him so much that I'm unable to see the hatred he has for me

Always connected
But no connections
Glued to every screen
Its all we ever see
What's the use of waking up?
Everyone else is still stuck
Stuck in a world far from this one
Escapism at its finest
I cant really blame them
I do it too
But sometimes I wish you could wake up
Talk to me
Talk to me in real life
You're not brave if you need to hide behind a screen to talk to me

Muscles aching
Feet sore
I cant stop
I have to dance some more
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
Comfortable clothes
Pin your hair so that it holds
Around and around
Bruises and ice packs
Snacks and spear clothes in my back pack
Practice makes perfect
In the end its all worth it

Assignments piling up
I used to be at the top
Burned out potensial is the worst
It feels like i'm cursed
The guilt of not being able to do the work
School comes first
My lungs arge going to burst
I cant breath
Math sheets and tear streaks
Science rapports
Weekends too short
Once at the top
Now I struggle to get up

I'm in the backseat of the car
Watching my life pass by in the windows
The car is on autopilot
I dont know how to stop it
But I know it can end anytime
It almost ended today
On the crosswalk
In someways I wanted it to end
I wanted to feel free
No more backseat in the car
No more car at all
Just nothingness

You can wish upon a star
But that doesn't mean you'll make it far
To get to the top and into the spotlight
You've got to do more than work
You have to fight
To earn that special spot among the stars
I've tried it, once, twice, trice
I always burn up before I get to shine
Wasted potensial of a dreamer who doesn't know when to give up
I hope one day I'll make it to the top

I have ambition
Always on a new mission
Working hard to get far
Burning like a star
But stars eventually burn up
Stop
I can barely move now
My body turning its back on me
Falling down all the stairs I climbed
Back at the beginning
Just because I'm back at the beginning doesn't mean I never tried
I try
I have tried
I have tried my whole entire life
Tried to be something I'll never be

I always wanted to move away
The other side if the world is where I'll stay
But I'll miss my family if I barely see them
I wonder if that's how my mom feels that way
She left her country and family for my dad
She barely gets to see her family
Does it make her sad?
She calls with her sister
She must really miss her
I hope we can visit her family soon
It will be nice for the family and my mom too

It all used to be so clear
The colours of the world so fair
The beautiful light
Everything was bright
How peacful it was to be blissfully unaware
But as you grow
The true colours starts to show
Slowly turning grey
Watching the beauty around start to decay
Seeing the world for what it is
Growing out of the childish bliss

Everyone and everything will be forgotten
It scares people
Makes them feel like they have no purpose
People need purpose
What is life without it?
Everyone fights to have a piece of them remembered
It doesn't matter if its good or bad
They just want to be remebered
The history books in school
Or hall of fame
I too want to be remembered
But not for something bad
Or be a famous movie star
I want to be remembered for making an impact
I dont care about reaching millions
Just one
Just one is enough
Knowing that I made an impact or made one person feel something
That's more than enough for me

If its selfish of me to leave
Then its selfish to make me stay
The person in pain continues to carry it
Just so that you wont have to
How is that any less selfish?
Everyday you see them
Half a ghost walking around
You want them to stay
Yet you do nothing to help
Guilt and dilemmas
Pain and gain
Day in and day out
You cant make someone stay
if they dont want to
You can try
But there is no garantee it works

Street lights
Morning and nights
Back and forth from school
Minding my own buisness like I always do
Then there is you
Walking past
My peace wont last
Disgusting liquid from your mouth
This all makes me want to shout
But i'm scared that if I do
I know there are much worse things you'll do
So I let you
I ignore it
Then i wash it off from whereever it hit
I just want to be able to walk in peace
Now I have to watch out for you spitting at me

Who am I?
I guess it depends on the eye that sees
Or how well you know me
In reality I barely even know myself
So who am I?
Do I base it of others opinions?
My failures?
Accoplishments I've made?
In the end how much does that really tell about me?
I'm just here
Surviving
Just like everyone else

She tells me how she feels
I know I have to heal
I can't make her fear come true
That would be awful of me to do
I cant let her have a dead big sister
So I stand tall, just for her
How my heart shattered at her words
Has it been this obvious how much I've hurt?
It must have been bad for her to tell me
Her biggest fear is me dying by my own hands
But I wont leave her, not a chance