She's the quiet one, who
never stands out the chick
who'll rather write a poem
than speak to a crowd.

The one nobody notices
when she walks down the
hall, the girl who's voice is
unknown but her mind's
full of thoughts.

She's the introvert, the girl
in disguise, the one who
builds up walls so her
life won't collapse.

The one whose tough
exterior in reality is
full of cracks.

She's a timid soul, a
daydreamer at heart,
creating the ideal future
while she tries to
forget her past.

The person who tells
her pains to a stranger
who asks, but can't
have a conversation
with those that are
by her side.

She's your classmate,
she's your sister and
friend, she's your
cousin and niece, she's
your aunt, she's your tale.

she's the girl that stares
back when you glance
at the lake, the one
no one knows, she is I,
she is her.

I yearn for the one I've never met .
I miss you without having seen your face.
I long for your voice, which my ears have
never heard. All I see are stares but I can't see
your eyes. Your smell is my favorite scent,
one I wish I could recall. You're a petal and
Christmas in may. A song I listen to but that
hasn't been written. You are a walk by the
beach which pavement is being built.

I want to be selfish for once, to get drunk from my needs
and soak on my wants. To get high from My Love and
wrapped up on my life.

I want to be greedy at last, to drown on self love and
asphyxiate on my laughs. To be exhausted from my
joys and depleted from good vibes.

I want to be narrow minded tonight, to feel voiceless
from speaking up and drained for being who I am.

I need to be ego centered and obliterate all my flaws,
to eliminate all the stares and feel I'm above them all.
It's time to be selfish and begin to live for me, they all
have their lives on play while mine's stuck on repeat.

i can't help but say
that i wish
he would find himself
falling into someone else's sheets

i guess i thought that i could learn how to drink away this lump in my throat

movies always taught me that when i turned 18, i would start shedding my skin and breaking down my walls but i didn't have any walls to tear down.
so i tried my hardest at age 18 to build them up, with the only things i had - boxes of matches
left over from burning down so many bridges

all because of some pieces of twisted metal,
i had to reteach myself how to drive.
and now i'm always 5 under the speed limit
i stop at every stop sign
no matter how angry i get

no one ever told me whether or not boxes of matches float
or why my neighborhood always looked so dark
and made me curl up like a dead spider

so now i stick my head in the freezer,
so i can get used to the feeling of my thoughts being so cold

now i kiss people just so we don't have to talk.

This
Is the first time you got
Dirt
Under your fingernails
This is
The first time your dad
Didn't come home
This is the first time
Your little sister got
Drunk
And told you about her
Nightmares
This is the first time you stood
On the top of a mountain and
Screamed
At everything
That ever wasn't anything
This is the first time you stepped out of your pants
And into another person's
Body
This is the first time.
Maybe all of your parents' fighting was just a test.
Whether you passed or not depends on how
Late
You went to bed, listening
Or how
Empty
The palms of your hands looked when you
Held them against hers because
You were taught that you should
Hold it all.
Music is hard to dance to when you've been
Taught to stuff your
Fingers so far into your
Ears that you can't even feel
Your own heartbeat.

You were taught to hate the color yellow and have two left feet.

i apologized
with old pencils i found in the bottom of my bookbag
with the erasers missing
so i couldn't take it back

I'd rather sit in silence and swallow the lump of feelings in my throat than mention that you're 4 and a half hours late and this is my only day off in the past 2 months

never
ever
ever
give anybody
a kiss goodbye
because they will cut open your chest
and dismantle your heartstrings
and take them from you

they will play crossword puzzles with your veins.

i am trying my hardest
to throw away my feelings for you
but they are sticking to my feet like mud
caking the sides of my new white shoes

I want you to know
one thing.

You know how this is:
if I look
at the crystal moon, at the red branch
of the slow autumn at my window,
if I touch
near the fire
the impalpable ash
or the wrinkled body of the log,
everything carries me to you,
as if everything that exists,
aromas, light, metals,
were little boats
that sail
toward those isles of yours that wait for me.

Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.

If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.

If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
remember
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.

But
if each day,
each hour,
you feel that you are destined for me
with implacable sweetness,
if each day a flower
climbs up to your lips to seek me,
ah my love, ah my own,
in me all that fire is repeated,
in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,
my love feeds on your love, beloved,
and as long as you live it will be in your arms
without leaving mine