DENAIL IN SUCH A MAGNITUDE FORMS A BODY
A BODY OF WATER
AN OCEAN
A PRESSURE
SO CALM, YET IT HAS THE POWER TO CRUSH YOU ALIVE
A PRESSURE
SO REAL THAT IT CONSUMES YOUR MIND
ALL CONTRADICTIONS HAVE A DEEPER MEANING
THINK ABOUT IT
A GIRL THAT IS SCREAING AT YOU
WITH OUT EVEN SAYING A WORD
AN ODORLESS FIELD
THAT HAS THE STRONGEST SCENT
A BLINDNESS
THAT WITNESSES THE MOST VIVID COLORS
WHAT YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND YOU DENY
REVERTING YOUR EYES FROM SANITY
WANTING SO BADLY TO BE IN A PERFECT WORLD
THAT YOU TRAP YOUR OWN SELF WITH IN THE IRRATINOALITY OF YOUR IMAGINATION
THE MORE KNOWLEDGE YOU GAIN THE MORE IGNORANT YOU BECOME
FOR KNOWLEDGE IS POWERLESS
WITHOUT THE ACEPTANCE OF TURTH
YOU TRY TO EXPERIENCE THE WARMTH OF JOY WITH A COLD HEART
EXPECTING TO GIVE LOVE IN RETURN FOR MONEY OR WORK
AND EVENTUALLY
YOU FIND YOUR BODY MOVING ON ITS OWN
IT MAKES A LEAP
LEAD ON BY DEPAIR
EXPOSING YOU TO THE CRUSHING SEA OF DENIAL.

When I see it hit the ground my heart goes weak;
Cause my heart has pushed way beyond its peak;
My burning love gave my flowers truth and meaning;
Your actions are like the forever changing seasons;
Then came autumn;
My leaves once green you made into brown;
They fall;
Like the once abundant tears from my face;
They Fall;
like the rain that pours on my heart;
They fall;
my expectations are now the regrets that tear me apart;
My mind now knows only the negative;
Hear my thoughts, look what you made me do;
I hope your guilt comes alive to destroy you;
Every tear I shed, all the pain I felt;
I hope you feel it tenfold when karma is dealt;
And when you come to tell me about your pain;
I’ll give you your words back;
“It’ll be okay, doesn’t everyone carry their own cross at the end of the day?”;
I hope the pain echoes throughout your life;
And bites you in the *** when you want to be his wife;
Pride and all I put aside for you;
I hope he breaks your heart because yours is way overdue.

I look in the mirror to find myself,
But instead see a 6 ft. lump of disappointment;
I have good intentions, but horrid actions are always dealt,
All the people who like me slowly start to resent;
Why can’t I ever get it right?
Why do I trap myself even deeper in rain?
I want to do the right thing with all my might
But it seems like I’m only good at bringing pain.

What am I to do when there nothing left,
I’m even a let down to the one I admire;
Ashamed of and shunned, like an untrained pet
Feeling like my soul is about to expire;
When trust is lost it cuts you deep,
I realize the hardships of the world;
I realize it's not just you but the friends you keep,
Understanding that life is more than money, education, and that special girl;

Questioning the deeper meaning of life,
Overbearing tragedies;
Questioning even being alive,
Locked in a phycological prison that doesn’t come with keys;
Always wanting the best, yet only getting a hint,
That I am nothing, but a walking disappointment.

I lie here in the dark, alone in silence
Nothing but raw emotional abundance
With thoughts vast like the voids of space
Looking in the mirror but seeing a different face
Slipping into danger because of my race
Why rush through life, when all you do is die faster
When strive for freedom just to act like the “*****”
I know my God, his grace and everlasting might
He gives all for us even when our pockets seem tight
Hide our blessings talking some “not for everyone’s sight”
Claiming to be religious but your really running from the light
See what they show is only what we want to see and hear
But in life thing are way different from they appear
Heartbroken so now you think you’re *** or gay
Literally crying because of how you lost your way
Believe in the system when it’s made to bring you to the ground
People in power that hype you up, take your money and tear you down
Lightweight problems we blow out off proportion
They owe you ten dollars so you force an extortion
Spoiled rotten so you can’t tell the struggle of succession
Got told “no” once you call it oppression
Want a little sympathy so now you in depression
Males going around with polygamous thoughts
Females call themselves ******* and display themselves as thots
Calling the Labeling as hoes and f-boys offensive  
Can’t handle the truth so your lies grow extensive
Can’t see the error of your own actions
So you blame it on others in three ways of “attraction”
Light skins, Brown Skins, Dark skins, colors for reference  
Small scale discrimination mistaken for preference
Flaws are a blessing they distinguish who we are
But we wanna be so “perfect” we treat our blessings like a scar
Can’t accept what’s real so you’re Running from reality  
Hiding your emotions and corruption in your mentality  
All for the game until the truth surface
Yes it’s harsh but that’s just the way it is
See you get mad when you can’t control the situations
You have to understand that the world goes deeper than rays and vibrations
And what funny is that a lie will carry you for miles
And the truth will carry you a lifetime yet when heard you go in denial
In life You’re not going to automatically know how to win
you have to question yourself and look deep within
you already know the answer but your clouded judgment and your past
Makes it seem as though the answer is beyond your grasp
but there are no clouds deep within you  
because what’s inside is only raw emotions and truth
Factions, gangs, cults all different names
Similar practices it’s all the same
Weak mind, lost of faith, no patience so no waiting
So hopeless that you worship Satan
You can take a horse to the river but can’t make it drink
It’s never too late to change the way you think
Free front the shackles of evil your soul
Repent and you’ll make it to the city of gold  
Get offended, cuss me, act how you feel  
I’m not being cocky, just showing that you can’t handle what’s real.

Vision blurred needing glass fixed at angles just to see
Unfavorable looks of hate because you’re against society
Laughed at for being passionate, bullied for being kind
Socially corrupt because no one wants a friend with a free mind


On the street you get no job, cause all you do go outside
But When Educated they tell you your over qualified
And I assure life is more than the expensive **** we cop
But morals mean nothing until this crooked system is stopped

Showing emotion is classed as being weak
And there’s always hate coming through the words we speak
God desperately shows us there’s a greater goal to seek
Everyone’s so impatient God said “Blessed Are the Meek”
Why have 20/20 when this world is nothing but absurd
I guess it’s blessing to be born with your vision blurred.

In a crowd or any color,
may it be red, blue, or even white,  
Black always stands out.  
When aligned with any color,  
may it be brown, yellow, or even gold,  
Black always fits in.  
When combined with any color,  
may it be orange, grey, or even violet  
Black always makes a significant change.  
When polished it’s beautiful,  
when dull it shows no signs of being so.  
Black is powerful,  
Take pride in your gift — the gift or melanin.

And like a fool I gave another chance
Knowing nothing will change as the time advance
I hate u with ever fiber in my being  
I believe in love and believing is more than just seeing
But at the same time I have love for you
And I fighting myself thinking *** to do
I may not show it but I also have emotions
And the way I’m treated only creates a painful notion
You see you want a real *****, someone who’ll stay down
But look how u treat them when they finally come around
You treat me like a horse without a saddle
Honestly, I’m sick and tired of fighting this one-sided battle