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Hislizard Dec 2019
Passing like the dream on a sleepless night
The moment it ends
I didn't even realize it started
Hislizard Mar 2020
2 AM
And your
Words still jab my cold soulles soul
No one noticed
Hislizard Feb 2020
I cried out my fears on paper
Swallowed my past with aspirin
Wore the mask of monotony
All along

Couldn't hate you
Even if I wanted to
You ended up doing deeds
You told me to avoid
All along

I cried out when I lost the battle with my demons
Swallowed my hope with tears
Wore the amour of plastic
All along


You deserve an applause
For how you're  hiding your lies in vain
Couldn't reach your limits
Even when I climbed a ladder
All along
Hislizard Dec 2019
The sun rose in the sky
The birds flew
I woke up
Feeling nothing

Nothing special
Not even a bit
Not excited
Nothing
There's no point in celebrating
My birthday

Just like
Another day in November
It flew
I slept
The birds rested
The sun dipped in the sea
Hislizard Feb 2020
Love is love here
But in some parallel universe
Hate is love
For instance 2+1=3
4-1=3
And then 4-1=2+1
Similarly if
love is love here
And hate is also love there
Hate=love in some parallel universe
Love=love here
Then Hate is love
So maybe the answer is yeah
Hate is love
And love is hate
Hislizard Feb 2020
No more is the flame burning
The inferno is eating you alive
Ash by ash
Smelling of regret

No more is it keeping you warm
No longer have you remained the only person in the world I trusted
Wonder if it was faking all this time
Your secrets have aĺl bled black

Wish I knew
Wish I didn't
It's burning you
But printing scars on me
Hislizard Dec 2019
There's not enough books in this world,
To hit you with all of them
Because I can't stand you
And books are quite handy for this

I realise how dumb I was
To chose you,
How you made me a book

I try to supress my loathsome
By smiling on the front page
But you dont know
How broke i am

You scribbled on me words
I could never forget
Tore my fragile pages and
Tossed them into air
Showing how much you cared for me
By burning them with fire of hate
I ignited
Hislizard Dec 2019
Here we are
living 1000 miles apart
Not an inch away
In the soul

Threads in the yarn of connections loosing each day
No one can be compared to you
Lame is your middle name
No idea how is your life pouring
No idea how much fun you are having
Without me

Each other's secrets
Guarded in each other's pandora box
Everything known from first names to first crush

The way you bob your head side to side
While dancing and snapping fingers
The way you brought muffins for breakfast every day
No matter what
The way you shook the chalk while writing on the chalkboard looking for ink
I find every dumbest thing you've done funny, Nigeria
Hislizard Dec 2019
Broken glass pieces of my life
Define me
Consequences of stepping on these glistening pieces
are way lethal
Ray Bans guard my darkest memories trapped in my vulnerable eyes from spilling
Not everyone is trustworthy
No use giving these devastated crimson red pieces,
which have been walked upon, to others
When they'll further crush them
and will be found sitting in the dustbin
Hislizard Apr 2020
All the memories came rushing by
From holding their fingers tightly to
them yelling at me to not sit too close to the tv
All the feelings shot at once
From feeling still in the sky at the swing in the garden to
Feeling sorrowful at their funeral

Rolling tears mixed with sky crying
Dirt on their grave apparently scented of their perfume
The wind wailed blowing  my hair aside

Gray face matched the colour of their grave now in front of me
Red top from Target  matched my eye
The darkness in the sky matched my life
Hislizard Dec 2019
Dont look inside
It's so dark, you will lose yourself in the darknes
The demons don't hide under my canopy bed
They hide inside these deep brown eyes

You have a place to hide from your demons under your bed
I can't hide from them
They live inside me

Get too close and you will see the beast
They haunt me every second of my life
Not a spark of light of hope

Show me the way to escape this cold hell
Where the demons have built a kingdom and are ruling my fears
Get this mask of fake mirth off my face
Hislizard Dec 2019
So surreal
Closing my eyes for a second
Expecting us to be holding hands the next
Expecting you to be here for real

Late night calls makes me long for that day
when we will never let each other be apart
You took a piece of my heart that day,
Waving to me at airport
Moving step by step away

You give me not only the butterflies but also the whole zoo,
When you tell me that you miss me too
The tears I shed are nothing beside the Nile
My heart fluttered when you gave me that on that one dimpled smile

I'll be crossing days over the calendar
Till we’re in each other’s arms
Until…I realized it was all unicorns and rainbows
Until…my eyes flew open
Hislizard Dec 2019
Everything that comes together falls apart sometime, someday
The fragile pumping ***** you have inside yourself is together to shatter in pieces sometime, someday
This earth you've been living upon will blast sometime, someday
Because all of them are meant to be broken

The chains of injustice, hoding back the innocent are made, just to be broken
The cells and organs and systems that make you, come together, grow together and so must fall apart

People fall apart and so do their lives, and why they fall apart has reasons,
And the reasons sometimes fall apart too
Foe
Hislizard Feb 2020
Foe
You crushed me into piecese
Bit by bit
Till I could not be mended
Made me who i am not
Someone who i never was
Someone who was told be kept at distance
Do that no more i plead
You've done enough damage
I have walked on the pieces you shattered me into
And bled myself
Faced the consequences
You broke me
Now you mend me
Shape me again
Fix me like a sane person
Keep me safe
Be my cobler
I ll be your shoe
I said
Staring at the mirror
Hislizard Dec 2019
Sometimes lakes freeze,
Somtumes our hearts do too,
But what if some day time froze?

Would the Earth still be rotating?
Would Juliet still be loving her soulmate Romeo?
Would the hour glass still be pouring sand into the other bulb?

I believe nothing would  have happened.
So what if the the Earth didnt rotate, it wouldn't **** us, now would it?
Amd as for Romeo and Juliet, their love story would forever and forever be immortal.
Hislizard Dec 2019
Faded memories of you calling me names bring me back to life
They hit me like freezing winds in the winter
Nostalgia fills me when someone calls me the name you called
I wish it were you instead of them

I curse at the little time we had
when I was too young to gather my thoughts
Abstract disjointed scenes of us play in front of me like a movie
A movie I would wish to never end

When people close to you talk to me,
I realize another time what I have greatly lost
Why in the world did they more time with you than I had with you?
That's unfair
Life should have made us cross paths earlier

Tell me how to breathe in this unfamiliar world
Now that my world is gone
******* with you
Make me  what you and your abstract disjointed memories do
Grow fainter and fainter like smoky thin air and then pfft....be gone
Hislizard Dec 2019
Hello,is there anyone here who does care
In this world not so fair ?
Hislizard Dec 2019
I do nothing but
Stare at the fan rotating
Round and round
Dance to Taylor Swift  screaming through my headphones
Writing insomniac pieces

It feels like I am being imprisoned
Within myself
Hislizard Apr 2020
Repel repel
Like magnets
Blue from blue
Red from red

I'll be the north pole, everyone else'll be the north pole
I'll be the south pole, everyone else'll be the south pole

Attract attract
Like magnets
Blue and red
Red and blue

I'll be the north pole
I'll be the north pole
I'll find my south pole
I'll find my south pole
Hislizard Dec 2019
He found me
When I got lost
In his eyes
Hislizard Dec 2019
Winking pearls in the ocean of darkness called sky remind me of my world
Winking pearls in the ocean of darkness remind me of you
We held our hands tightly together and looked up and smiled
You pointed to a line of shinning diamonds and told me it was an Orion's belt

Three exquisite white beads stood out amongst the million others
Just like the way you stood out amonst the million others
The beautiful silence under  these twinkling stars bring back your words
Our bond is just like the universe - infinite, you said
Absolutely just like it
The universe and our bond will forever and ever be infinite
Also you vanished into thin air just like the stars

Funny thing about stars
You still see them years after they are gone
Just like the way I see you
Hislizard Mar 2020
Mirror,mirror
Tell me why I cant feel myself anymore
Hislizard Dec 2019
Like man's life without oxygen,
Like bee without petals,
Like soul without heartbeats,
Like Tom without Jerry,
Such is my life sans music.

Music has the power to heal,
All you need to have is the ability to feel,
The sorrow within yourself will disappear,
And your life ahead will be crystal clear.

Dive in the ocean of music and devote yourself to it's waves deep,
Tune in to a soft melody and go off to sleep,
Once you feel it from within your heart,
You'll realise it never lets you break yourself apart.
Hislizard Apr 2020
Looking in the mirror once again
I see myself
Digging deeper for more regrets,mistakes,scars
As if I dont have enough already

All ink  all paper combined would be  less to describe the flaws and faults
All compliments would make their way in the old dusty brown box named lie in my head
All mockery would be approved and felt by each skin and bone
All deeds of past would help in staying up till 2am

Known for trying
To be someone I'm not
To mask the demon beneath smiles and laughs
To pretend to have more problems than anyone
To be perfect
Hislizard Dec 2019
Said I was fragile as glass
Now you broke me in upteen pieces
Never can I be mended hence
Thought we were flawless
Little did I know then
Now we part ways,
Imprinting a hole of emptiness in my soul

Could neve wipe the grin off my face
When we held ourselves in each others' arms in years agone
You were the soul reason for my mirth
These commence to bury
These commence to fade
Now we part ways,
Imprinting a hole of emptiness in my soul

Nothing can reduce my loathsome for you
Never the thought of betrayal had crossed my gullible mind
Never thought it was too good to be true
Guess you proved me wrong
Now we part ways,
Imprinting a hole of emptiness in my soul
Hislizard Dec 2019
The prettiest eyes have cried the most
The most beautiful smile hides the most secrets
The kindest heart has bared the most pain
Hislizard Dec 2019
Each stroke defines what a perfect creation of god you are
Sea blue eyes reflect the vastness of the sea
Cherry red lips potray sweetness of cherry
No wonder where I got my sweet tooth from

Each dab of paint on the palette reveals your true colours
Red for love
Blue for no limitation
Red for pain
Blue for death
Black for demons

Each shade painted unfolds the number of lives you lived and desths you survived
Hislizard Dec 2019
I felt myself drowning
Reaching the surface for air
In the ocean of teardrops
I shed waiting for you
Hislizard Dec 2019
Deafening streaks of light chose to escape its mouth
Baby ocean seems to have an upset stomach
Now crying tides and waved is the only way too soothe

Rocking in the sea is my ship of life
Hope it doesnt kneel
Drowning one moment
Rising in another

Blanket of white fog takes the ship under its cover
Nothing but sky of darkness around
Unsure of its way
Oh wait,
something can be seen

Blur beam of light leads to a path
Looks pretty similar to the ship's destination
Will the sail reach it destination
By the waves of destiny
Or dellusion of the lighthouse?
Hislizard Jan 2020
The past is drawn to me
Like moth to a flame
Nearer and nearer
Till it turns to ashes

People say it's going to be fine
People lie
They dont know how it feels like
To look in the mirror everytime
And say i hate me

Sleepless nights welcome the haunting memories
And play they like a horror movie
Again and again
Throw them out of the window

I am killing myself by blaming me
For the mistakes that were not mine
I'm doing it again
I'm running from myself again
Hislizard Dec 2019
Screaming is all I can hear
Shouting from here
Curses from there
The room is locked
And my homework is in there
But its due tomorrow
I need to get it done or I 'll stand out of class tomorrow
I stood patiently,
Holding nana's hand
Expecting the door to burst open any moment
Shh it's gonna be ok
Nana said
I didn't believe her
But I wanted to
Oh how badly I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs  to stop shouting and hide in my bedroom
It's been 8 years and I still want to do that
Hislizard Nov 2020
Somedays i wish to be an open book
Somedays i wish to be a jammed lock
Somedays i wish to have company
Somedays i wish to have peace and solitude

Somedays i wish to be someone else
Somedays i wish to be with someone else
Somedays i wish to be thin air
Somedays i wish to be the spotlight

Somedays i wish to be harmless
Somedays i wish to be happy
Hislizard Mar 2020
All but few are blind to my soul
Found Layered with cracks and hole
Sometimes black or blue
Other times some dark hue

Dark for no one can see the real me
Longing from myself to be free
Light at the end of the tunnel difficult to find
They ask me if I've ever smiled
Hislizard Dec 2019
Alligators moving unnoticed
Waiting to be fed
Just like the demons ruling my fears obdurately
Waiting to be fed

Almost so clear, the predators can be seen
If scrutinized
Eyes so deep, the secrets can be seen through
If scrutinized

Silent waves look easily defeated
They create no choas outside
Filled with tiny droplets of intelligence
Acting as a cog
Still waters run deep
Hislizard Feb 2020
I cried myself to sleep
When I realised
I had no more tears left to cry
Hislizard Dec 2019
Set of light brown eyes
Conceal a million demons
Behind black thin wired glasses

Dark brown hair
Entangle secrets
That haunt

Pink glossy lips
Dare not reveal any agony
Hislizard Dec 2019
Dare you not
Get lost in the labyrinth of black petals of secret
Encircling the surreptitious illusion

Thorns shielding are long gone
As vulnerable as glass
Waiting for the twig to break
Any time soon

Exquisite to some
Negative to others
Evanscent, kind, fragrance longing to last
Just a moment longer each second

Dare you not
Mistake the dark hue
And deceive yourself into think
There are no walls differentiating
The upteen dried scars

Dare you not
Mistake me dead
Hislizard Dec 2019
Don't scare me
Don't leave me
Don't trouble me
Don't let the salty water escape my eyes

Tranquil as sea
Can't bear this silence
Speak a word
As insulting as it may be

Don't disappear
Don't run away
Don't make me worry
Dont leave unanswered

Curious as I'll ever be
Need to know what's wrong
I don't want to go and be left
For I want to go and make things, along with you, right
Hislizard Feb 2020
I hate you
But I dont
Hislizard Nov 2020
Withing four walls
Her agony echoed
Fingers dug in the upholstery
Leaving oval marks

White replaced black
The grip on both loosened
Caramel was chomped and chewed on
If only it lasted longer

Ere it was seen
She heard
Her agony echoed
Within four walls
Hislizard Nov 2020
The uninhabited white mettalic body crosses the sky
Risking its fall inch by inch,
Flying parallel to time
Creeping towards its unsure destination

The eyes sweep across vicinity
Searching for a cause
Looking for something but blue
Seeking a reason to fly

In the ocean of fog, it hovers for a decade
Terminating its fuel
Resting its wings
The uninhabited white mettalic body touches the sea
Hislizard Feb 2020
I scream but there's no one to listen
I shiver but there's no one with a comforter
I cry but there's no one with a tissue
I feel pain  but there's no one to soothe it away
Everyone's here to just twist the knife deeper in the gut
Being left alone with no shoulder to lean on is the worst thing
Living in this world is even worse
Hislizard Feb 2020
You act so natural
I wonder if it's genuine
Hislizard Feb 2020
How does it feel
To lose someone
You never had
Hislizard Dec 2019
People go
But the way they left
Always stays
Hislizard Feb 2020
Why am I pondering over someone
In whose deep dark oblivion sea
My ship has already sailed
Hislizard Dec 2019
Sometimes you just need a shoulder
To lean on
Hislizard Feb 2020
I want to sleep
And never wake up
Hislizard Feb 2020
Under the gloomy moonlight
Here I am
Crossing white days
On the grey wall

Trapped in four walls
Here I am
Chained to the wall
Breathing the air of prison
Hislizard Mar 2020
Forgive me for thinking out loud
My thoughts were meant to be kept
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