Guilt
Follows me like a shadow each day,
For the deeds I've hidden away.
Fear consumes me, a silent cry,
What will they see if truth meets the eye?
What whispers will echo, what shame will remain,
When will my mask crumbles and reveals my pain?

This is the torment I carry inside,
Not when the act begins, but when it subsides.
Peace eludes me; I’m torn apart,
Living a lie with a fractured heart.
A hypocrite, a living shame,
Warning others, yet fueling the flame.
I pray, I preach, with guilt so vast,
A sinner shackled by shadows of the past.

The question remains:
Why?
Why nurture this poison, this endless despair?
Why not uproot what I cannot bear?
Addiction binds me; its grip is strong,
Even when I resist, I am pulled along.
It steals my dignity, my worth, my soul,
A cycle that swallows me whole.

I am adrift, a ship in decay,
A soul that's lost, with no light to guide the way.
I saw the beginning, clear and near,
But the end?
It remains shrouded in fear.

I am weary of hiding this gaping wound,
This life-stealer, this silent doom.
I am done coddling this parasite,
Tired of being bound, losing the fight.
I am done with addiction's chains,
Exhausted by the cycle of endless pain.

Oh Lord, have mercy on my soul,
For without You, I cannot be whole.
Extend Your hand; I’m drowning still,
I’ve tried alone, but lack the will.
This river swallows all I am,
Oh Lord, restore me—my heart, my plan.
Freedom I seek, from chains unseen,
Grant me peace, make my soul clean


© Happiness Enobong Inyang

Tick Tock
The ticking echoes in my mind,
A sound that won't leave me behind.
It pulls me back to this place,
Where darkness hides, and pain takes space.
Injected with agony, it flows within,
A poison I can't escape or win.

Tick Tock
Time is running, drawing near,
I hear death's whisper, cold and clear.
It calls my name with an endless scream,
As fear grips me, shattering my dream.
My lips tremble, ready to say,
“Give up, I can’t go on this way.”

Give Up
But giving up, that’s not who I am,
Stubbornness is my battle plan.
Pressure pulls me, but I resist,
Seeking a way out, I can’t dismiss.
I've come too far to lose it now,
To let the darkness take my vow.

Struggle
This fight for life grows fierce each day,
They say I'm crazy, but I’ll stay.
The urge to quit, it never wins,
I refuse to let it pull me in.
What’s the point of almost reaching,
If I give up just before I’m teaching?
No, I must keep fighting, never retreat,
A battle I’ll face, no matter the heat.

Hope
Through this storm, the pain will fade,
And joy will find me, unafraid.
I’ll find a way, I’ll break these chains,
And leave behind all that remains.
For this pain, I will endure,
Until the light comes shining, pure.

© Happiness Enobong Inyang

Blinded I was,
By women who never cared,
Failing to see the treasure
That stood before me, rare.
I traded gold for stone,
Left true love for the unknown,
Overlooking you, my Queen,
My only, my own.

Days have passed,
And years slipped away,
Now I see you clearly,
But you’re no longer here to stay.
All I have are memories
Etched deep in my soul,
Of the love I ignored,
The heart I let go.

Here I sit in regret,
Wondering why I didn’t choose you,
Why I chased after fleeting illusions,
While letting your truth slip through.
You wanted me—
And I turned away,
Distracted by appearances,
Not seeing the love that would stay.

Now I understand the saying’s might:
“You don’t know the worth until it’s out of sight.”
Shame has opened my eyes at last,
Revealing your worth and the love I surpassed.

Each day, you linger in my mind,
The one who embraced my flaws, so kind.
You loved my strengths and healed my pain,
Your smile—a light that will always remain.
Even when I was careless, you still cared,
A love so pure, so rare, so unfair.

My mother’s prayers, long whispered above,
Found their answer in you, the embodiment of love.
Now I see what I failed to before,
You are my treasure, my heart’s core.

I plead for a second chance to prove,
That I can cherish the one I almost lost.
Even if you turn me away,
I’ll chase your heart, come what may.
For you are my Queen, my treasure, my light,
And I’ll pursue you, day and night.

© Happiness Enobong Inyang

Alone I am
Idle man I become
A worker of the devil I am
Cloud of darkness is above me
Pouring out drops of sin like rain on my head
I smell unclean outside and inside me
Because I choose to be the devil's tool

A contract I was offered by the devil
A contract which hard to break
Happy I was at first
I never knew this happiness will not be my story at the end
I can say I am dead
For sin is feeding on me slowly
If you see a simile on my face
It is fake and it will fade away
For the devil have taken my smile away from face
For sadness has taken it's place

A way out
My master claims not possible
I used to believe this
Till I found the grand master
Who had broken this contract long time ago
Who is greater than all
For only him is my savior
Only him has the strength to pull me out of this ditch
Only him can clean this ****  painted on my face

My knees touch the soul of the ground
My hands up
For I am a run away son
For I left life for death
Mercy I beg
Your hand I need
For only you can save me from this cause I brought upon myself

© Happiness Enobong Inyang
The devil's contractor