How many worms have
Made a home
Out of the
Bits of rubber tire
And tree bark in the playground
At the Sunday School
Where I first learned Hebrew

Can I fix this rip in my jeans that
Keeps getting a little bigger
Every time I slide my leg in
And my toe gets caught in the
Negative space

I started a collage
Of ripped out pages from
Fahrenheit 451
And a Highly Classified
Army/Navy Manuel
Specifying the different threat levels
And codes
And Troop Commands
During a Nuclear or Chemical Attack
On American Soil
I stole it when I was removing debris
From homes destroyed by a hurricane
On the Barrier Islands with my brother
A few strangers
And a lizard I called Little Eyes

Is the big picture starting to come together
I’ve been listening to a lot of
Swedish
Trash Punk recently
Maybe I’ll give myself a tattoo
That says
Anarchy Dies With Me
Right across my neck
And a Safety Pin earring

The consulate was acting strange
After I drove through the glass doors of the
Embassy in my McLaren
I said
I’d like to immigrate to
A Clockwork Orange
Drink Milk and be
Ultra Violent

Next time you come home
Make sure you bring zip-ties
A tire
Your old hair
An apology note
Three bags of flour
A harmonica
And some bribe money
For our favorite elected official
I have an idea

I am the
Psychonaut
Who smoked
Toad Venom
First
There isn’t
A simple answer
The rain
On my tongue
That the ancestor
Asked for

Do you know that sound
Someone makes
When they are
Trying to describe
Their mind being blown
Like the whistling of a bomb
Or an embrace by a loved one
Like a rare guide to creation
Or a video showing god
Like a massive cult
Or an anonymous host

Restless leg syndrome
Can creep up into your arms
Your fingernails will grow long
Your patience short
Measure one against the other
Drugs to keep me up
And down
I’m making coffee at 3
In the morning again
Who knows if I’m awake

I’m hoping
This has been a dream
And I’m on the edge
Of a creek
In South America
Foaming at the mouth
From DMT

More likely than not
I’m in my room
Wishing I was in yours
Wishing we stay together
A long time

The time is 3:13 am
I saw someone with your hair today
She walked with grace
This stranger
But you make the world crumble
When you step
Leonardo was invited to design one
Person
During his time in heaven
There was no
Aura of fire around this girl
Do you remember when we went to the beach
72 Days from now
You stepped into the wake
And I watched the water boil
Or the day
You started giggling
When I asked
What is it
You lifted me up without touching me
And as you floated to meet me
Said
Wanna see where I grew up

I want you to kick me under the lunch table really hard
And give me a look that says we should have went to prom together
My favorite place
Is a Burlington Coat Factory
Near Ramapo College
From the parking lot
You can see all of Manhattan
If you have time this year
Can we go to the Newark Airport
I’ll rent a 93 Toyota Avalon
We can lay on the hood
Throw m&m’s up in the air
And try to catch them in our mouths
Every time a plane comes over us

When I imagine you
I imagine a day like today
Not a lot of snow
Enough to make you that mix of
Hot chocolate and coffee
My head in your lap
Looking up at your smile
Your favorite movie bounces off your face

The time is 5:54 am
Inside of the car
Air is visible
My fingers don’t feel my skin burning
They are so cold
Here is a scene
From the Punisher Movie
That came out in 2004

A man is hanging upside down from a chain
Another man is putting a steak on a plate
The Steak Man tells The Upside Down Man
Some flames
The blue ones you know
They are so hot
It will feel as if your freezing
You won’t be able to tell
Your flesh is boiling
The Upside Down Man squirms
When he hears a blowtorch
The ones that have a tank on the bottom
The Steak Man laughs
And sticks a popsicle hard into the
Upside Down Man's back as he burns the meat

There’s an interesting disconnect between
How I see my heart
My visualization
Full
Red and alive
Comely
And the thick
Unimaginable mass
Fighting to breathe
That it is
It feels at the moment
As if you were right here
My chest is hollowed out
In a euphoric way
That specific rhythm you hear in your throat when you are as close to the outside of your eyes as possible
I can hear every synapse crackling with electricity
There’s lightning behind these eyes

I thought I told you
I was blind but now I see
I sang that in Carnegie Hall
Fire
The truest form of human intelligence
Feeding those around with energy
Saving them
And showing anger
Divine in spirit and truth
You take your time
And I love that
People in ancient times thought lightning
To be celestial fire
I am still la torre
However I used to be the two men falling ou
Now I am the structure that holds firm
Ivory still
With Defenses Made By Tesla and
King David

The time is 6:33 am
I always wanted to meet someone
Who had those vines
That weave between fencing on the side of a house
The jungle path would lead to the window of their room
You woke me up 20 minutes ago
By jumping on top of me and pounding on my chest
You started yelling
It’s snowing
Over and over again until I hit you with a pillow
You stood up still on the bed
And started dancing

What is the best poetry you asked
Your drive
Your spirit
All of the fire
I can see behind your eyes
You tell me every day as I fight my battles
As I strike outside our window
War has a price
You bring me the truth
And a home with a fireplace

The time is 6:52 am
I think I’m going to go to sleep