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Oct 2018 · 207
Titles are simple spoilers
Nia Oct 2018
I’ve met these few,
Lifetime friends,
At school it’s true,
But they met ends,
They won’t help and you knew,
I’m not one for trends,
So keep me away,
I dare you,
I guess it’s too late,
For you,

I’ll stay awake,
I’ll lay asleep,
I’ll stay in your wake,
I’ll lay and I’ll weep,
We aren’t all happy,
But aren’t all sad,
Its a weird mix of three,
Content being bad,

I wish I could fear,
Wish I could touch,
Wish that I could stop,
Loving you so much
I know you were the best,
Best I ever had,
Wish that the good,
Outweighed the bad,
Then I’ll never,
Get closer,
Until you tell me,
“It’s over”

I understand,
People don’t see,
I tend to rant,
On my poetry,
But it’s not for you,
Reading my piece,
It’s for my view,
My inner peace.
Sep 2018 · 152
A little announcement
Nia Sep 2018
Just wanted to say,
Thank you,
For all those days,
You’ve all kept me alive, really
You don’t even know it,
But now I’m not my own species!

All this support,
All this help,
It stuck with me like a wart,
When I needed it the most!

So I thank every last comment,
For what you’ve done,
Changed a life,
Maybe more than one.

But my death is inevitable,
I am impatient,
Just know you’ve helped,
Just know you’ve tried,
Just know eventually,
I will have to suicide
Feb 2018 · 152
Emotional
Nia Feb 2018
Am I happy?
Am I sad?
Is this good?
Is this bad?

These are all my questions,
I want help but,
I'm not open to suggestions.
I want peace,
I want life,
I want truth,
I want to be happy,
through all of my youth
Feb 2018 · 168
just...
Nia Feb 2018
No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No        No       No               No       No No No                     No No No No No        No       No        No No        No No No       No        No No No No No                     No              No        No No No       No        No No No No No        No       No        No No        No No No                    No No No No No        No       No        No No        No No No       No No No No No No No        No       No               No                     No       No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No
Feb 2018 · 153
all love
Nia Feb 2018
When people say they love you,
They might be lying,
When you feel blue,
They'll keep trying,

But then it'll break,
You stare through the lake,
The secrets it hides,
Leave you sleep deprived,
Searching,
Needing an answer,
Waiting,
Needing an answer,

Then,
Lost the question,
Searching to no avail,
No need to persist,
No need to remember,
Remember when you kissed,
Feb 2018 · 161
Fall down
Nia Feb 2018
My heart,
Is beating in my chest,
I don't know,
If it'll ever cease or rest,

But I want the truth,
Are these mistakes?
Or adventures,
from my youth,
Do i even have what it takes,
Do I want to try?
Do I want to make life easier,
Will I crash, burn,
Fall like a meteor,
Fall from the sky,
I thought I could,
I thought I could fly.

The sun,
It's burning my sadness,
Is this good,
Will it leave pain or madness,

But I want the truth,
Am I insane?
All these questions,
Messing with my brain,
Do i even have what it takes,
Do I want to try?
Do I want to make life easier,
Will it end, die,
Fall from the world,
Fall from the lie,
I thought I could,
I thought it was goodbye...
Feb 2018 · 227
Open
Nia Feb 2018
I know people,
who are determined,
to leave this world,
They'd rather take life,
Than give meaning to others.
Help themselves,
Open themselves to a lover.
Trials of life,
and I'm screaming for another
Feb 2018 · 140
My valentines message
Nia Feb 2018
You pretend to like me...
You say you care,
but those lies,
i couldn't be less aware,
I raised to your voice,
I fell to your touch,
I didn't do what you said!
At least,
Not much.

I wanted friends!
I wanted to be in your life!
but yours is pain,
And mine is strife.

Sticks and stones,
may break my bones,
But at least I'm not like you.
At least I'm not part of your "crew".

You make me belong,
You're right,
You're wrong,
Feb 2018 · 146
Yes, No, Maybe
Nia Feb 2018
Voices say yes,
Family say no,
Friends,
don't want to see me go.

But my life says maybe,
It is never certain,
No-one wants to see me,
Drop the curtain,
As if I leave the stage,
They'll blame themselves,
Pain, Sadness and Rage.

The people that care,
The few aware,
They know I'm Trying,
They know I'm Crying,
They know I'm Dying,
Feb 2018 · 155
Trials
Nia Feb 2018
People say I don't feel,
They say I have no pain,
Because instead they squeal
and look away
when instead i walk astray.

I don't walk to face my fears,
I don't jog to lose my love,
I don't run to find the end,
But i'm sure gonna catch up!

I walk to lose my fears
I jog to know my love
I run to know the end,
Because I've had enough!

I move to leave the others,
I move to find my friends,
I move to prove,
I just won't quit,
I just won't stop to rest.
Feb 2018 · 148
Suicide
Nia Feb 2018
Everywhere is still
Everything is restless in my heart
I hate the way this feels
Suddenly I'm scared to be apart

The days are dark when you're not around
The air is getting hard to breathe
I wish that you'd just put me down
I wish that I could go to sleep

Loving you is suicide
I don't know should I go or should I stay
I'm trying to keep myself alive
Knowing there's a chance it's all too late

But I heard you say you loved me
That's the part I can't forget
And I wish that you'd come save me
Cause I'm standing over the edge

I should let you go
Tell myself the things I need to hear
But my brain is why you're wrong
That's why I'm loving you when you're not here

Feels like I drown in your every word
And every breath that's in between
Somehow you got me where it really hurts
It's killing every part of me


But I heard you say you loved me
That's the part I can't forget
And I wish that you'd come save me
Cause I'm standing over the edge

Loving you is suicide
And my world's about to break
And I've had as much as I can take
And love is a long way down

Loving you is suicide
And it's getting harder everyday
I'm trying to keep myself alive
Knowing there's a chance it's all too late

And I'm way past every moment
But I'm still determined to fight
And I know it's taking all my strength
To keep emotions alive

Loving you is suicide
Feb 2018 · 138
Why don't you try?
Nia Feb 2018
I want to end it all,
I want to help myself,
I want to be selfless,

"have you tried?
that's the question"

"the question is:
do I want to try?"

"trying is always worth it."

Sometimes I lose track of what the question is

Will you try?

Why don't you
Feb 2018 · 152
It doesn't need a title
Nia Feb 2018
I call you up,
you turn me down.

I try to smile
but i only frown
Feb 2018 · 261
That's Why
Nia Feb 2018
Dear, People

When tomorrow starts without me
And I'm not there to see
I wish so much you wouldn't cry
The way you did today
While thinking of the many things
We didn't get to say

Two slit wrists with a scythe
Too ****** up, had to leave this life
Two slit wrists with a scythe
Too ****** up, had to leave this life

It's no joke, too low
I can't cope, smoke dope for the pain
One glock, one shot, point it straight at my brain
Do not resuscitate, told you don't hesitate
I put a end to the voice in my head
Nobody ever listened to what I said
What I said, Nobody ever listened to what I said
I don't really **** with the rest
Young kid flex put the blade to ya neck
One more step, *****, you lose your head
No one remember the **** that you did

I made myself what I am
I turned myself into the man
I made this dough in my hand
But still you don't understand
Don't understand
It takes dedication and some discipline
Talent, drugs and experience
But to be honest, living life, I'm sick of it
Even if the money's still coming in
Even though people still bump my ****
**** the world
Death sounding luxurious
Look in my eyes
If you don't think I'm serious
That's why...

Two slit wrists with a scythe
Too ****** up, had to leave this life
Two slit wrists with a scythe
Too ****** up, had to leave this life
Two slit wrists with a scythe
Too ****** up, had to leave this life
Two slit wrists with a scythe
Too ****** up, had to leave this life

                                                               ­                            -Love Nia
Jan 2018 · 144
Balance
Nia Jan 2018
Life, Death,
Drown, a Breath,
Our world is full of choices,
Mine are guided by the voices,
The things I hear,
The things I see,
They're not normal but they balance me
Jan 2018 · 179
Get out
Nia Jan 2018
Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head.Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head.  Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head.


Get out of my head before I tell you the truth.
Get out of my head before I do what you're telling me to.
Get out of my head before I listen.
Get out of my head before I can't take it anymore.

Get out of my head before I tell you the truth.
Get out of my head before I do what you're telling me to.
Get out of my head before I listen.
Get out of my head before I can't take it anymore.  
                      
Get out of my head before I tell you the truth.
Get out of my head before I do what you're telling me to.
Get out of my head before I listen.
Get out of my head before I can't take it anymore.

Get out of my head and I'll tell you the truth.
Get out of my head and I'll do what you're telling me to
Get out of my head and I'll listen
Get out of my head and I'll take it more

Get out of my head before you start to care
Get out of my head before you say you liked me
Get out of my head before it hurts me too much
Get out of my head before you make more lies

Get out of my head, and don't start crying
Get out of my head, and move on from me
Get out of my head, and remember my past
Get out of my head, and try to help

— The End —