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February Mar 2019
Try for awhile
Maybe today
Will anyone ever know
The spinning, the falling
I thought I’d grown

Fake a smile
I’m okay
Time to let go
I’ve fallen
I’m alone
February Mar 2019
I’m disgusted by you
By your inability to shut up,
And to point out my flaws.
How you reject my feelings,
They mean nothing.
But even more, I disgust myself-
Cause your right.
And I hate your for it.
For adding to my insecurity,
Plummeting my self worth,
For adding to my sad thoughts-
They’re already there.
I hate you,
But I hate myself more.
For letting you affect me,
For giving you power over me,
For letting myself sink into depression
Whenever I see your face.
I hate me me more than I hate you.
I know it’s wrong,
But I honestly don’t know what I’d do without you.
And that’s what I hate the most-
I’d be lost.
February Mar 2019
Inescapable
The ugly, the hate
Dragging me down
To broken depths
I surface
Gasping for air
Only to careen to the ocean floor
February Mar 2019
Deafening silence
As clock seconds turn to hours
Striking me dumb
Refusing to cry,
To mend the broken,
To share the fragments of my heart
Only to lose them
To the back and forth
February Mar 2019
I am but one
The shadow of despair
Grey to black
Monotone fading
Mind tugging
Into oblivion
February Mar 2019
At a standstill
Why can’t I move
Looking for goodwill
But there’s only truth

Too shy
Too headstrong
As life passed by
I was wrong

Why couldn’t I see
I missed my chance
Only room to disagree
My firm stance

Too late to join
Should’ve started young
Now there’s no point
I won’t belong
February Mar 2019
Quietly,
Let no one notice
As I fade away.
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