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Dessi Oct 2017
I'm sorry you don't see the real me, so hidden in and so clearly gone you believe and embrace the fake, in turn I take and remake it until I'm no longer needed. Forgive me for understanding that I'm a last choice, I get the point, I know, I know. Lost in a world of labels and filters, keeping in mind I'll forever be in shivers, told my self it's going to get better than this, can't even believe in this **** anymore. Told myself again it will be alright, don't lose the might, don't lose the fight, your not sick, it's all in your mind, numb yourself with cloaks of hatred and you will make it. Your years of tears were meaningless and your bipolar makes you colder. Weak knees, and spilled milk give no reason for your unnecessary treason. My body is my country, and I wage war on it. My internal afflictions are my muse, and your pain my inspiration. Desperation, to see the brighter side but my eyes are blind and this prison I call my mind will not let me die. I want to die, **** the feeling, **** the sound of the voices of Damien, and the two ******* with the same vision and the water rising around my decisions, suffocating the right to listen to the small girl in her cage. She claws like a animal who had freedom, but lost it to the name of love.
Dessi Jul 2017
I'm seeing them.
And I am Immobilized!

I'm hearing them.
And I am Mortified!

I'm feeling them.
And I am Paralyzed!

I'm smelling them.
And I am Demoralized!

I'm touching them.
AND I AM EUTHANIZED.
Dessi Jul 2017
Can't you see it?
Can't you hear it?
Can't you feel it?
By now you should smell it,
You could almost taste it.
Don't you know the difference between...
Humans..
And People?
Just like the difference between Angels and Demons.
So obvious, the answer is right there!
It's impossible not to see it.
Are you stupid? Slow? Oblivious?
How about...
Ignorant- of the truth
Judgmental- of the oppressed
Cemented- to your ideals
Cold- in your hands
Resentful
Artificial- to the young
Selfish, hateful, sinless, monogamous, desireless, careless, and all the more senseless.
Yes, you are...
A Person.
There is a difference even if the word is describing the same thing. To me there is a difference, maybe I'm just crazy. But then again, both are posssible aren't they?
Dessi Jul 2017
Depression, Obsession, Disorder, and Confusion
Magicians of the Illusion
Caught in the battle of the Delusion
Ranting and raving
Endless paths to your madness
When will it all cease
Why can't they hear me?
I'm screaming
I'm crying tears from the past, the future, and NOW
When can the agony become a soft, sweet feel..like a chainsaw to a body
I miss-no crave that
All I see is black, and there is nothing sweet nor soft about it
Many doors that all seem to be covered in your own blood
Rivers of Lye and your Lies surround you. You only have two options...
To die in the lye..
    To make up for ALL your lies by the Saw...
                           ....No Such Thing As Happily Ever After....
When I made this poem, I was as always depressed. I wanted to stop feeling like I was being constantly tortured by my own thoughts, the only way I could come up with was writing. Now I want to share because I know I'm not alone with the thoughts I have. At least I hope.
Dessi Jun 2017
Love is pain
Gut wrenching, tear jerking, agonizing screams.

Love is tormenting
Unforgettably toxic and constricting

Love is disgusting
Untrustworthy and despicable, dedicated to tear you down in a instant

Love is insane
Blurry and overwhelming, caged by your selfish demanding

Love is lost
And I wish I never did

— The End —