Within my presence
I feel a great void is to be filled
And I stare into the empty light
And I blink to the eruption of my heart
And in this moment, I present myself
With two options:
Fulfill my written life
Or break under the weight of the pen.

All I’ve ever needed
Was a late night answer
A call
A word
I stay up waiting
Waiting for you to come back
For anyone to
Countless nights spent this way
Even the shadows
Never drown my thoughts
Even the ceiling
Never looks back

I’d hate to tell you
What you’ve done
To ruin the image of you
In the mirror you love
To ruin the things you hold onto
Be bitter or sweet
The image of blind truth
The image of me
My image that you ruined
With your carving lies
My image has loosened
He left and has died

The world stays at a constant state of
Within, without magic
Within the beauty of nature
The unfamiliarity of variety
The indecisive nature of choice
And without the simplicity of love
The acceptance of the individual
The realism of dreams
As I breathe this air, its apologetic indifference
scolds me
Nothing will ever be magical unless it is made so

I could never believe you,
For I have nothing to trust.
Nothing to hold
As though it were my own.
To feel, together as we do
On a breezy Saturday afternoon.
When I believed in what you’d say
I believed in who you were
And I’d follow you all my days.
A trustworthy companion,
I beg, poison me again.

As I roll over,
I expect to meet my lips with yours
And to pull you close
As the morning cold engulfs us.
I expect to laugh with you
And to smile
As you stretch, and the sigh of relief,
I feel too.
I expect you to rub your nose on mine,
To remind me I have something
To wake up for
And my heart warms as you do.
This morning, I woke up alone.
On my half-made bed.
Cold, unwelcome by my own warmth.
No amount of stretching will relieve
The crick in my neck.
Why am I even awake?

We feel too
The way you treat my heart
The pulsating, life giving, Petri dish
of love
We feel too
The way you rock back and forth
When your heart aches like mine
We feel too
The way you caress my rosy cheek
When you need to feel it as much as I do
Yes, we feel it too
The unanswered question
The expectation
Then, subsequently, the explanation
Oh, yes, we feel it too.
Sit awhile, won’t you?