Your pircing glares
They hurt more than I show
I don't understand what happened
How things got like this
Thinking of how things used to be
It tears me to pieces

I sit here
Telling you how I've been
Telling you about my new friends
Telling you what I want to do
But you don't hear me

I sit here
Showing you pictures of friends
Showing you pictures I colored
Showing you my grades
But you don't see them

I sit here
I blow you a kiss
I leave my picture next to you
But you don't know

I walk away
Leaving your grave
Until I visit again

You think you can hide it
But I can still see it all
The pain, the memories
The fears, the wounds
I see them all as they
Cross your face
The emotions I see
They don't scare me
What honestly scares me
Is knowing you don't
Want me to see them

I'm liked cracked glass
I will shatter if not handled with care
Loving you has done this to me

I tried all the remedies
I tried to heal the wounds
All I could do was numb the pain
A temporary fix

I let them chase me
But that's all they want
A chase

They don't want the home to share
They don't want the kids
They don't want the happy ending

I let them chase me
But I want the happy ending

I used to love going outside
I used to love playing with the kids
I used to love making plans

Now I want to stay in bed
Now I want the children to go away
Now I want to have a reason to cancel plans

I used to hate being alone
I used to hate crying myself to sleep
I used to hate goodbyes

Now I love being alone
Now I love the post crying naps
Now I love seeing them go

I graduated high school
But that wasn't enough

I got a full time and a part time job
But that wasn't enough

I started going to school full time
But that wasn't enough

I got good grades
But that wasn't enough

I became involved at church
But that wasn't enough

I made friends
But that wasn't enough

I helped at home
But that wasn't enough

I've tried so hard!
When will you be proud of me?