Partially
Have you ever felt partial? I mean like your important but not actual. Your always there but not fully, your loved but not truly. Ok let me break it down for you, cause it may come as something new but it’s just the truth.
You see when your partial you tryna make everyone happy not seeing that it’s hurting you internally. I mean he partially wants to be with you? No he doesn’t want to date you it’s complicated now but somehow he wants you to stick around, he wants you in that thong,he wants answers to his text, he wants you to be there like his pet! You see to me that’s a relationship just without commitment, so tell me how much partial  can you get?!  
Each relationship you’ve encountered people only want you partially, you wonder why and start to cry thinking aren’t I good enough to be someones entirely? May it even be a friendship your best friend has another best friend which makes you number 2 or may it be that people around you find your to nice and used you, like a switch when they want you but discard you back into the darkness when there done but you don’t realise, cause you’ve already formed a bond.
Is this what not good enough looks like?
it's what I've felt my whole life.
not smart enough for my mother,
not pretty enough to keep someone captivated,
not interesting enough for a friend,
not thin enough to even like my body...
you could be everything someone asked for and still not be what they want.
when everyone in my life so far has only walked away..it's what I expect now.
but strangers surprise me still,
just once I would like to look in the mirror and see what they see when they look at me.
how is it so easy for someone that doesn't know me to see what everyone else has missed?
maybe that's the problem, they don't know me.
if they did I'm sure they would change their mind like everyone else did..
But life expects to see my self as a  gem, which I don’t mind cause it true
so pure, partially gorgeous,
yet i have no idea how precious I am , i will always see myself  as an invisible rock, laying down there between thousand of others, full of mud and just not good enough. So now you understand when I say my life is so partially because clearly no one need me fully!