****** worthless basically imperfect but spiritually   feeling worth it,

The times I felt it's the world against me with outside pressures I take one knee,

prayers with my cries no answer so I prayed to  two sky's  they answered with all lies,

Now With every second on this earth?,left me with  resentments of  my birth questioning AM I WORTH?.......


Gorilla®

Hi my name is David and I'm a mediforic ****** and if you try
To stop my words I've been known
To act a monkey,

No longer shall I hide I'll hold my chest with pride, screaming  to the
Rafters I'm a mediforic ****** now
After

Pronouns, adjectives , and verbs come to me in words I can't explain  but the letters they flame I selfproclaim but it just not the same

So I'll need some words to get high and I'm talking paragraphs not one or two to get by

   I hope you can help this mediforic monster,who shares his addiction without a ******* sponsor

He was conceived by two
Junkies and if you do
The math it equals one
Monkey,

Wild little youngster; sold
Dope On the corner and
Bourne in a dumpster

To his enemies he's a
Thief, murderer some one
Who knows no better,
but

To friends he's classified
A real go getter,

And would **** you if
You came between him and his cheddar,

He walks with love and hate
On his heart, and when he's feeling one you can't tell
Em apart,

He was Bourne into the life
Doomed from the start,

Felt life's bite but didn't
Heed life's bark

When my black rain is falling I hear whispers of demons and death calling,

Why do my problems seem to bear this burden I feel, sometimes I wish I was dreaming but I no its fo real,

I pray to heaven but sometimes I feel it just isn't enough I no times are hard
But how did it get this rough?

The demon he awaits inside the chamber, I click once nothing, then twice but this time with anger,

When my black rain is falling I think it's to much pain to endure give me a reason to live because I can't think of what for,

So I click again because I'm to the point where I really just don't care I cry out with my black rain falling it just isn't fair,

When my black rain is falling I here death calling should I answer the call click click click I feel numb my body starts to fall,

No longer shall I hear the voices of death begin to call, and no longer shall I feel my black rain continue to fall

BLACKSHEEP

I belong to the thieves the dealers and the pimps no matter what they didn't or did,

I belong to the single young mothers of militant brothers who struggle to feed there kids,

I belong to the assignation of my parents with  one suspect to blame,
He walks with the devil his name is *******,

So much time has past feeling so wronged greeted with fake smiles and hugs made me feel I belonged,

Emotionally some what dead but

Religiously we'll feed, feeling blessed enuff said

Acting like my reflecting ant true,  my biggest fear is I'll become you,

Fake promises of being
present as your child grew,

My love is lost your love it's  felt with scares from every swing of yo belt,

So dead wrong with your Fatherly ways of being so hands on,

Left me a  product of your abuse but so head strong,

GORILLA®

8 years mama been gone and I'm still crying

All this time I've been trying to live but I'm still die n

Trying to take the religious road and follow, but the ideal you gone is hard to swallow

Mama you used to tell me,"you gon miss me when I'm gon but you don't even no",

Now mama gone I'm crying it's wrong asking why did she go?

My smile is my tears with happiness camouflaged for years,

With My hand gestures and grunts I tell many truths,
Make you look past my smile to really see the abuse,

Walk wit me talk wit me let my scares tell the story ,
he raised me from the tombs healed my wounds and now I feel his glory!

When my tear drops fall I call it black rain,
Collect them in jelly jars label them pain,

Can u Sing my blues, bare my losses pay my dues,walk wit me talk me fill my
Shoes

Let my scars make u bleed
Haven't felt this empty since I lost my only seed

Pain, pain, every accord  hale Marries didn't work so l call upon the lord,

Please please I pray this from my knees at the gates of heaven (my house) but I lost my ******* keys  smile

TIME seconds, minutes, to hours the embasador of death,

You can't anticipate how close the two really lie death is for certain but very few want to die

Let's hold hands and together we will welcome the two, head right into the eye of the storm like the brave men do

Then look him in the eye and cheat him like he's cheated others taking our relatives and separating us from our lovers

All these years you've enjoyed my strife your weakness is to let Jesus christ in my life

It's a joy to see u finally run in fear from the fact my savior Jesus christ is here tears of joy transformed from tears of fear future was blurry but now it's clear

Steady trying to fill this void from my mother no living full of lost at the same time thank the lord for what else is given,

So I stand here a man with sum of his heart missing cause mama gon left my heart wishin,

When it comes to the heart you are the half to my whole, sum wounds are healed but I still bleed from my soul,

Trying to keep my faith steady but you passing got me ready,

So every time I wake up without you I die again thoughts of going with you but I no its a sin but God willin I'll see you again, and every time I pray I ask him when?

So I'm left with tatoo tears without the ink, holes in my armor with out the ***** but I stand on his word and will not blink and will not blink

Here he comes the big bad monkey banana ****** wit the jungle as his flunky,

Fully equipped with his hundred yard stare and a streak of silver in his hair,

Animals of the jungle kneel to his feets,
Cause he pocesses the strength and swag of 50 fleets,


Not blood thirsty but his thirst varries from figs to berries, here he comes king of the Congo beating his chest like a bongo,

Doughter don't laugh clear his path or feel his raph,

Prime mate top of the food chain when it comes to terror they are one in the same

When it comes to terror he'll make it rain and when terror is spoken bout remember the name GORILLA

******* room 636 talking bout they got my baby and she trying to get fixed,

I come the room doctors got my baby stretched out on a gernie like she Bernie,

All I'm thinking is where's my attorney some body gon pay for putting my baby on this journey,

Can you blame me I'm angry my baby got to learn to walk again and they gon let them walk again

Thoughts of revenge and malice but now is not the time my babies life lie in the balance,

They steady telling me to refer to the good book (bible) yea I'm reading but lord this dream killer almost stop my baby from breathing

6 months she get is treason my baby lost half her family but for what reason

The slight fainting of hand the texting on a cell phone who new that

something so slight now our babies gone
who new that something so slight could take our babies home

Lord I'll pray but it's wrong

My thirst remains steady while your breathing gets heavy,

Moist was your choice beging for more in a passionate voice

I'm kissing every part of your body with my lustful lips

With every ****** I give you you twirk your hips

Multiple **** faces with multiple **** places from side streets to out of coupe drops from off the banks of beaches to on roof tops

Little mommy went hard in the paint and bared none, but big daddy go harder in the paint and that's why we won

So here I stand a somewhat heartless man wounds are healing yet still open thoughts about taking my own life but I'm cope n

But in the next breath I'm praying and hope n I don't tie this loose around my neck and start choking

From every direction I feel these pressures as they come camouflaged as my stressors

My family,? Yea they pretty curious wondering if I've become delirious saying,"I never smile and remain so ******* serious,

Or, "how is he dealing with these feelings he's feeling he should give his life to God and they ask me am I willing, but Im just chilling lol

You dare to laugh, at my pen my gun
My staff,

So much versatility in  introduction
Of pen and paper, instant humility

My depictions of words Allow me to splurge  mediforic descriptions that purge all from the
Pen this urge,

And when I paper they merge, and together they breed my words are it's seed it is my pen I need it is my  weapon indeed

Her Escense of a queen her walk certified mean,

Butter scotch complected she carries the smell of vanilla I specifically selected

She's all mine my little ray of sunshine keep me on stuck she cook like she ****

And every time she nut she yelling at me WHAT!!!!! Lol

I no I hurt u in the past with promises to deliver, did things to you to make you cry a river and don't blame you for feeling bitter,

Seriously we owe each other an apology, but when I say apology you act deaf to its terminology,

So what am I supposed to think I screamed its over you didn't even blink

It seems together we've come to this conclusion that the love we had was only an elussion?, was the spats we shared merly confusion?

The passion the love was it really there,
To question who's fault is it really fair
That's  a burden by myself I wouldn't and shouldn't bare

I spent all my life looking for
Ms perfect,

Finally I've found her now I'm
Not worthed?

When my love came to me so quickly no time for even a hi,

When my love left me like she came with not so much as a goodbye

Like any lovers we had our ups our downs my only question is why

Did you leave true love for lust please be forthcoming don't lie, please grant me some closer just try

Have you ever loved someone so much it hurts, tried everything u could but it still wouldn't work

Late nights waiting on him to come home with lame excuses on why he didn't answer his phone

You cussing and fussing at the same time shaking yo head as he gets in bed smelling like *** and patron

If yall fall asleep you both should feel cheap, but you even cheaper cause you treated him like a king and new he wasn't a keeper

Looked at him as a man of strength but new he was the weaker shame on you knowing your relationship through lieing saying your relationship grew

Asking yourself was my relationship true?

I don't intend to fight with our troops I'm not asking Santa for money rims our coupes,

Just some simple steel toe boots so I can stomp mud while putting haters in my tred,

They hated so much this season it's a wonder I ant dead,

Enough! It's Xmas I'm a forgive all the hateful things they might of said,

And stay focused on keeping my life up out the red,

So no Xmas presents or Xmas tree just steel toe boots for my haters
And good health for me

STRAIGHT FROM THE GHETTO HE ROSE, SO PHOTOGENIC SO
HE POSE,

MORE TO HIM THAN JUST  JEWLRY AND HIS  CLOTHES,

When WALKS HE TALKS WITH A LITTLE PRIDE IN HIS STRIDE

DAT BOY LIMPS LIKE A **** BUT NO HOES BUY His SIDE

MANY HATED STREET EDUCATED WITH NO DIPLOMA TO SHOW

BUT A Phd IN HUSTLING  WITH HIS MASTERS IN BLOW

NOT MANY FRIENDS BUT HIS ENDS AND  STILL with his DEMEANOR HE SHINE

SELF MOTIVATED HE MADE IT AND GIVE THANKS TO THE GRINE

GORILLA®

Creamy shinny skin some what like
Bronze,

With a limp like a **** some what
Like the fonz,

He pocesses  a hot touch as much as an African summer,

With a choice voice as loud as the crackeling of thunder

So cool  he talks with his walks when he runs he slides so smoove when he groove he glides

Highly misunderstood when standing from where I stand, I was getting abused by my mother while she was getting abused by her man,

Age 9 by default of my mother left to be the families leader forced to be my brothers keeper young men so all we could do is watch em beat her,

Well if not for the beatings it was *****, the pills, or the powdered ******* we had no food or clothes it went all in her veins,

No hugs no birthdays no love shown or kisses, no suits on Easter no presents on Christmas,

CSB knocking mom said "it ant they business", but mom he beats you and were your witness,

Two years later mother made Jesus her savior but struggled along the way with  addictive behavior, but I prayed lord save her

Please grant me this one last favor, yes I'm minus an addict for a mother a currently deceased brother but I still miss him and I still love her

UNFORGIVING


Dear lord please do me a favor, forgive me for not loving thy neighbor,

Forgive my enemies lord for they were malicious in there intent,

And forgive me lord because I was relentless in my defense,

Please forgive my enemies for breaking your commandment
Thow shall not steal,

And when it was from me lord, forgive me for
Breaking your commandment thow
Shall not ****,

Yet in still I pray to Jesus my savior

to smite my enemies down who tries to
Take the fruits of
Thy labor

Written by

My walls my walls was built to  keep you out, with important information
Within and about,

I tried sharing my caring how daring
I'd seem, to let you preview my passions my thoughts my dreams,

What would you do wit  these top secret thoughts and skits that would be otherwise impossible  for a secret agent to get,

Would you hold me close would you love me most until we are one, or

  Play wit  my heart split it apart and take my love And run