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I know you are eager to see the sights,
the sounds and songs of fair Paris,
but trust me when I say Quebec
is just as wonderful and elegant.

I was born, and raised in that land,
learning much of all things grand,
from the peaks of Mount Royal,
to the art of Montreal Metro.

I learned of law and of order,
and to this day, I still enforce it so.
You know me as Chief of Police,
for this, I am widely renowned.

Yet, for all its glitz and grandeur,
and its modern beauty and glory,
there does exist a darker side to which
I must inform you in whole.

When you're visiting lovely Quebec,
and you're walking down Old Montreal,
keep an eye over your shoulder
for La Femme Folle du Montreal.  

She's said to creep in the alleyways
and between the old cobbled streets,
snooping for curious tourists
on whom she leaves her mark.

When she spots a sucker she likes,
she greets them with a smile of white,
and beckons them to come closer,
and that is when the mad woman strikes.

She guts the poor souls like dogs,
cutting and slicing them till they're raw.
Once she's done her deed, she leaves in them
the sign: "La Femme Folle du Montreal".

The police have yet to find a lead,
that didn't end up like her victims, dead.
For though her crimes are grisly in nature,
beyond her sign, no evidence has been had.

Little do those silly idiots know the truth,
that she lurks among them, laughing,
her position and rank protecting her.
No one would suspect the Chief herself!
The world is like a dancing marionette,
constantly spinning and swaying on a dime,
its movements amazing and hypnotizing,
and no one stops and sees the strings.

So they say it's all randomness and chaos,
some sort of wild, cosmic dice toss
with no sense of order and morality,
and no one to say what is wrong or right.

But the world runs on infinitesimal strings,
slowly shaking and shifting with each silent motion,
another day is decided or a drink is imbibed
each vibration choosing a nation's fate.

From the universal big beginning,
to what one had to eat for breakfast,
it all comes down to silly, simple strings,
that decide for us, all and everything.
When the sky was opened,
and you appeared,
I felt a sudden fear.

A certain realization,
a punch to the heart.
I felt the fire rising.

I saw that you were alive,
and something higher still,
while I was still here.

I wondered what it was,
grounding me down,
and you so above.

Would I be stuck here
forever alone am I,
while you stood above?

Fear turned to anger,
and anger to hate,
and here I am today.

Waiting, watching, wondering,
when next the sky will part,
and I can make my move.
If Life is truth, and never a dream,
yet dreams are a part of life,
then dreams are a true illusion.
Won't you be my crazy lady,
and won't you be my crazy baby?
Tell me that you'll rock my world,
and I'll be your lover evermore.

When I see you walking around,
I can't help but gawk in awe.
Your long hair, your soft skin,
and the way you look at night,
it sends me into such delight.

You dance the night away,
and I watch the way you sway.
I see how your body moves,
and I can't help but be in tune.

In a moment, I was hooked
like a fish on a line, out of time.
I stepped to you, asking your name,
trying to get to know you good.

You didn't say a word, but flashed a smile,
and winked and took my hand,
as we searched the Motherland.

Before I knew it, you were taking me
to all kinds of new and crazy places,
and meeting all kinds of strange faces,
but through it all, I bared through
cause I knew that I had you.

I did shots off a woman named Rita,
and shared a line with a girl named Kita,
took some pills with a lady named Lita,
and through it all, I never thought to learn your name.

Cause you were my crazy lady,
and soon, you'll be my crazy baby.
Gotta beware the ****** Machine,
the ****** Machine, quick and clean,
the ****** Machine, run you through,
the ****** Machine, rip you in two.

The ****** Machine is coming for you,
black coats, and black boots stamping in tune
in light of day and the dark of the moon.
The ****** Machine pounds its chest.

The ****** Machine blots the sky,
its oppressive cloud tainting the world,
always watching, always judging,
your faintest mistakes, always begrudging.

The ****** Machine is big, bad, and bold,
it has our minds and the masses under control
to fight, to resist is to wait and die.
The ****** Machine reigns supreme.
The world is blue,
and so are you.
I spent years tangled up in you,
but now I’m done, with all of you.

The world is blue,
and I am blue,
and you are blue,
and I am through.

My heart was blue
caught up in you.
I’ve been tying myself in two
ever since I first spotted you.

My heart is blue
and I am blue
and all is blue
but so are you.
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