So much to go wrong
So much that never went right
It's just one of those nights
Where the light never shows
Because the sun hides behind the midnight Blues
Between the whiskey above the counter
The marijuana in my drawer
And these pills in my hand
I don't know what to take first
To cure my anxiety of never being enough
The light that escapes the darkness
And enters my room
From the moon
Shows a spotlight
To what's right
It looms over my eyes
Like something great
That has a mysterious fate
It's too bad I never believed
In fate
-Cnk

Why am I so conceded
I see everyone as if they’ve cheated
It’s not enough to just prove it to me
I’m a *******
One who’s mastered
How to sleep when the bats stir
I’m not sure
What to do

I don’t know what I want
Who I want
Or how I want it
All I hope is that the devil neglects me
So that angels detect me
In time to protect me

Looking down
On those without a crown
I stand in silence
Judging
Smudging their good name
Comparing them to fame
Only a crane can pull me out
Of the ditch I’ve been lost to

-Cnk

I’m empty and I like it
Every now and then
I search my soul
Only to find what I’ve known

I’m prone to feeling alone
It’s not something that I condone
Like a shadow in the dark
I disappear to where
No one can hear

I feel a certain kind of sad
One not for everyone
The mellow entrancement pulls me under
Thunder comes from above
I’m stuck in the slow drizzle of an oncoming storm
But unlike everyone else
I don’t want out

Some call it misery
I prefer to understand it as bliss
No one to bring you down
No one to keep you up
The emptiness inside
Only makes me feel more alive

-Cnk

Dark and stormy weather
Nothing's better
Than the feeling of the mist in the air
Not a thought of despair
Looms in the air

Dark clouds bring the feeling of sadness
Is it madness
That it feels so right
Dim lights set the mood
For what we're about to do

Wisk away in the rain
Helping keep you sane
Can't you see
This is how it's supposed to be
A kind of free

You and I forever
Throughout this endevour
Not a soul can severe
These bonds we've made
Under the gray blue clouds
As we fall under the shroud
-Cnk

The cold breeze
Of a Monday morning
The gentle sun rise
As the moon falls from site
Despite the cliche happiness
Sunlight doesn't feel the same when
Dark skies are where you thrive

So leave me alone
When the morning shows
I can't endure the thought
Of a new day
When I wasn't finished
With the last

I need more time
To fulfill my mind
The earth will slow down
Then there will be no sound
Just myself
Dragging the chains that bound
-Cnk

Some say I’m warm
And inviting
Like Liquor on a lonely night

When my friends leave
And my family’s off to bed
I’m sentenced to face myself
Through everyone I’ve mislead

Above my face releases
The sight of being nice
But journey under my skin
And realize I’m cold as ice

I can’t help the disguise
Connected to my skull
It hides the real me
The one put away unconsciously

I don’t want anyone to see
What’s not the best of me

As I sit up I stare
At the blank walls
The dark closet

It’s 8 O’clock again
Time to go
Make sure my dark soul doesn’t show
-Cnk

The music in the background
Provides a shadowy undertone
For the blank stares
There's nothing in her eyes anymore
After all the pain you've caused
She's finally let you go
Don't ask her to stay
It's the only chance she has to walk away
She can find her way
To the day
When she's staring into my eyes
And when she takes the chance
To indulge in my romance
She'll see
Why it was never anyone but me
-Cnk

My earth rumbles
My ground shakes
All because of this one mistake
All this burning passion
And my heart still aches
From the loss of my happy place

Every now and then
I check my phone
Just to feel more alone
I'm far from humanity
But **** close to insanity
In my isolated conscious

I'm sorry
I know it's too late
And you probably think it's fate
You were my everything
But take a look around me
You're no where
And now I'm no one
-Cnk

The futile remains of what I used to be
Is now dead and gone away
Like she wanted me
So much blame was passed
I think that's why it didn't last
They're right
You never know what you have until they're gone
Like the wind
I hear her slam the screen door on her way out
Her tracks on the hardwood floor
As a reminder
There will never be anymore
-Cnk

Loneliness secrets through my body
As I struggle to understand
What’s wrong with me
Answers
That’s all I demand

Left out in the cold
In a cave of inconsistency
Who knew I could be so bold
Finding truth in the lies you’ve told
Trying to escape this mold you trapped me in
Set me free
Let me go
I’m turning cold

Darkness surrounds me
Enclosing my walls
Setting me off as a torn soul
Some wouldn’t say I’m damaged
At all

Look inside me…
All the way in the back…
Where it used to be flat…
You tore out a valley…
Now it’s black…
How about that

-Cnk

Something about those words
The ones I heard
You told me lies
And sold me alibi's
I can see it in your hardened brown eyes
We're all gone
Like yesterday
I know it's hard to say
You wish I would stay
But we both know I have a long way
To recover from the whiskey soaked dream you caused today
I have to walk away
Maybe some day
You'll see my face
Knock on your door
Pour me a glass
And we'll laugh about our past
But for today I'll see you another day
Goodbye has never been so hard to say
-Cnk

Why can’t poets be happy
All we talk about
Are tales of depression
And minor suppressions

That lost eye contact with the girl down the hall
Maybe it was saving you
From an even bigger heartbreak
The world saved you that mistake

Why do we think everything is lost
We’re the ones who tossed it away
Maybe we just want the thrill
To be lost up a hill
With no one to save us
From the fate
We gave us

I’ll never understand
Why we can’t withstand
The thought of happiness

It’s so ****** up
That we write in the shadows
And we close up
To those who love us

Maybe I’m just mad
At the world for all it could be
Why does everything have to be so sad
Not all of us go bad
I had a dream everything was okay
And had happiness written in the sky
Too bad dreams end with what we could
Have had
It makes life seem so much more sad
-Cnk

You get angry
You take it out on me
As far as I can see
I’m just a voodoo doll
Trapped inside your cursed walls

This pain
Inside my brain
Burns like an eternal flame
Doused in shame
I thought you wanted me
Not just another name
For your little black book

You say you don’t need me
But I can see
That I set you free
Why would I let you be
Anything but next to me

-Cnk