The martyr stood,
shaken on the ledge,
with the courage of a god,
he jumped off the edge.
And he sailed down the sea,
as the gulls cried and cried,
and came to rest,
by his salt buried bride.

A ******,
a ******,
how depressing to see,
a ******,
a martyr,
made of you and me.

And it flows,
and it flows,
red ink in pen of frail bone,
This garden of souls,
where it grows,
where it grows

My skin turns to my brain
and my brain appeals to my heart

                                                          ­               keep doing this and
                                                we'll fall apart

                                                          ­          like you did when-

Stop,                                                     ­                     
don't you dare                                                            
­bring her up,                                                            
I­ don't ******* care.                                            

                                                               ­             If you just        
                                                                ­      t a l k e d -
I don't need to talk                                                             ­                               
I want to bleed, I need to be bleed,                                                           ­                                 
        and yet my bloods still clotting                                                         ­                                   
It's a ******* irony                                                            ­                                

                               ­                      We need help-

We are not we                                                               ­                             
You are you and I am me                                                        

                                                                ­       Without a heart we can't be-

THEN DIE WITH ME





                                                         ­                  You can die heart,
                                                          ­                                  leave us be,
                                                             ­                   the heart will die,
                                              We'll be a machine.
                                                        ­                            With chains and links
                                              That fracture and freeze,
                                                         ­                                   you'll be you,
                                              and we'll be me.

I wanted to spread messages of hope,
To inspire life inside people's hearts,
Fires larger than snowy mountains
And tornados carving their place in the world.
The results would be deep chasms,
And ashes nourishing life a thousand time brighter than before.
The results would be human.
As bright as the sun and willing to burn you if you got to close
Because they'd learned that they weren't yours to touch.
Their light was a gift not a privlige
And they'd learned to stop chasing the moon because love means to live for someone.
Not die.
And they'd be deep as the sea,
Coral reef skin and raw emotion because the salt had flooded them head to toe to throats to heart.
Beneath the kelp forests and kissed fish would be their darkness,
Their loneliest place built for their loneliest self and I'd swim down.
I wouldn't be scared of this darkness,
I couldn't be because this darkness was you.
You'd learn that you could let the sun through a little deeper,
That happiness was for you to feel, not a show to put on for other people.
I'd swim down to you but you were always strong enough to swim back without help.
I wanted to help people.
But as times passed those hopeful messages have died.
And sometimes I feel so numb it's like I'm drowning at the bottom of the sea,
Buried beneath the pressure,
Struggling to breath and there's no light, no nothing it's just black and empty and I'm scared, I'm scared of this darkness because these aren't your demons anymore,
These are mine.
I wanted to help people remember they're good enough,
That they're worth saving,
But as time goes by,
I can't even save myself.

You're a liar,
you're disgusting,
a coward in lions clothing.
A murderer playing martyr,
an opposite Oedipus,
**** the mother, love the father.
Cry for help,
sing your hymns out of tune,
love the sun and miss the moon.
Compare yourself to flowers?
You're a ****,
choking your lover and filled with greed.
A fowl mouthed, black cowled, red monstrosity.
-red?
No not your hair, it's your blood,
start out a tear,
end with a flood.
You're god now,
in control of your soul
somehow still not whole.
Wash yourself clean,
you're Babylon's *****,
make stomachs turn
and the holy water         burns

              burns

                                     ­                   BURNS

Cut Samson's hair and tie it to your own,
maybe it'll give you strength
to form a knot, tie a length.
Amen,
love yourself,
what's there to love?
You're nothing.
Nothing but rot.

Let yourself go,
breath in the water,
love the burn,
you're gods favourite daughter.