Today I fell out of like with you dear.
Although I still hate not having you near.
I'd rather nothing, than a version of you;
that's neither loving, nor coming through.

For I won't settle - for just attention.
I need unity, in shared direction.
You know I like you, yet you fail to give,
your time and presence - jealousy instead.

I cannot run.
I cannot talk.
I cannot breathe.
You hide from me.

'Perfect in countless ways' this shared thought lingers.
But they cannot create pretty, pleasant pictures.
For those 'perfect' puzzle pieces misalign - beware...
Knitting a painfully incompatible pair.

I fell in love with the feeling you give.
I confused it with the person you are.

My love, if it be true,
that the best thing about you,
is how you make 𝓶𝓮 feel...
Then I must make a change.
Then I need to get real.

Can I trust you to take me through the death of my mum and my dad?
Not 100%
Can I trust you to raise our kids alone?
Not 100%

I need 100% baby.