I wrote poems and sang songs to make the love I had more alive
Wrote endless passages tryina explain what my heart sang
I tried the best I could to make the words I said more meaningful
Stayed up at night tryina find ways to hold and touch you right
I paused every moment I had with you
shut the world out for there was you
I begged and I prayed that I find ways to love you right
asked for the strength to be there for you
I stayed even when my heart ached from the looks they gave you
Saw the thirst in their eyes whenever they looked at you
I knew some would know how to touch you and some, to hold you
But again, I knew neither would love you like I did
They had all the right words to say
Had all the right ways to feed you what you long desired
And I knew you'd easily fall for you stayed with me who couldn't
Even though you said I was all you needed, I knew you needed more
I saw how happy you got when with them, a happy I never saw reflect when with me
I know I sparked a certain happy in you but it was never as long
I still hope I could,
that I could love you just as you wish
But again, I'm still the same person if not better
And deep in my heart, my love whispers your name
Once more longing to keep you

Was too quick to conclude
when alone was truly how he felt
Was too quick to judge
when he done gave and couldn't keep
Was too quick
too quick to realise he was aching more than he portrayed
Truth is, strong was the last option on his list of do's
Selfish is far from what he is
Unknown is the depth of his wounds
And how dare I call him narcissistic when life led him to be
How dare I portray self a saint in an ocean of sins
Life was never kind to him, how dare I demand him kindness
Love never loved him, how dare I demand him love
He can't give what he doesn't know
That,
That should've been my conclusion

Take me not for a fool for caring,

See me not naïve for loving

Treat me not like a puppet for being of service

Have me not be another for I am the only

My heart may overflow with love but it too aches,

My eyes may spark the light in you but they too do cry,

My arms may be as warm as summer but they too have gone cold

My hands may give but they too once did not have

This big heart you find residence in is no field to tap dance on

This forgiving heart of mine has dealt

I am of no vanity nor am I made of steel

The god in me may shine brightest but evil lives in me too

Blame me not for the sorrows your ones may have given you

Punish me not for their lack of ability to love you

For when I walk I look not behind,

For when I shut down no fuel of yours can make me accelerate

I wave once, I sail once

I give chance but not too many

Naïve as my love may seem to be to you

Its pain made my heart wise

Caring is not stupidity

So never confuse me to be the one that will slave for your love

For love has come for and left me

For people have seen me later overlooked me

I’m no fool for you

I’m a fool for what love be –

Kind, sweet, forgiving, accepting, understanding….

Even so I know when it’s time to take a leap and when to guard self

For love is not hard or forced

For love is not pain but rebirthing

I may be the one that chose you

But I too can be the one to leave you

Like the wind I will carry you

Not as my own but the one that took my breath away.