Your silence is slowing devouring my soul
The pain in which I condone is slowly tearing my brain from its dome
Yesterday, I reached my lowest point
I put the gun to my dome but I said NO
I gasped for air,cried and entered it to my soul
The pain would end but it would only start to occur
For my family and loved ones will suffer more
I won’t lie I can’t take it no more
Although I came close I froze and thought of the days in which we were close so I CHOSE. Why be 6 feet below the floor in a storm of all dust when I can be a couple feet from my newest goal
Enforcing love into my once called AMOR...
God placed me in this earth to open doors
And here I stand ready to throw bows for anyone that stand close
You and I are like a hearts pulse
We recklessly jump, however we produce love
I know I closed the door but I beg you to let me in close
Give me a chance to bring you a rose
And every night before I doze kiss your lips while your cheek rubs my nose.

Will my pain ever go away?
Will my daughter fall into my alcoholic ways?
Will I make it past twenty-five? or will my past catch up to me and leave me dead like my brother after they let off that 30 round mag?
Mom would you miss me? Would you come to my grave and wish you could kiss me?
Will I be forgotten?
Brother will you make it? or will you fall victim to the game?Will revenge and hatred take over your heart? or will the love I gave you guide you towards the right from the wrong?
Daughter do you forgive me? do you remember all the times I asked "how was your week, you missed me?
Sister's are you there? can y'all visit me and annoy me cause I know you always cared.
Father are you happy? Can you tell me how you slept after you get your morning coffee?
God may I come in?

Born with no guidance nor purpose on sight
I manage to walk through the darkness of life
fear of the unknown unclear of the goal
I keep my head up seeking chance, seeking hope