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Anastasia May 2017
I've lost my sense of self, it has left me and has left this shell of a human that can only fake smile and laugh. It's still there, but it's hiding from me. I still feel the eternal sadness I've always had, but it's faint.
You may think, good sadness, it's gone. But you'd be very wrong.
The sadness is the only thing that makes me feel warm. It stays with me and makes me feel safe.
He is the only one that makes me feel safe, he wraps his arms around my figure as I cry uncontrollably and makes me feel better; then he slips away slowly. He is the only one who makes me feel whole in this empty barren world we call home.
He is with me now, but I know he will leave like everyone else.
Everyone leaves the earlier you figure this out the easier it is to not get hurt.
He is here, he will be gone, when he leaves I will be half of myself, I'll be back to the shell of a person. Fake smiles and laughs, I lost myself, and I can't find him anywhere.
Anastasia May 2017
I can't feel my heart anymore
I can't hear it
Pain and heartache is all I feel
The sadness in my heart is too large for me to handle
Crying is the only way to cure my broken heart
I'm sitting here writing this with glistening tears running down my face
Am I not beautiful enough?
I ask myself this too much, I doubt that anyone can love me
I just want love, that's all I want in life
Is that too much to ask? Am I not good enough for anyone?
My whole body hurts. I see all these happy couples and doubt my significance in this life
The hurt I feel, the heartache I cant escape is eating me alive
I just need someone who is going to hold me and tell me it is all going to be okay.
I need a person who is going to be there, thick and thin, through the hard and good times.
As I sit here crying silently, I ask myself is it really worth it?
The life I live is good, but nothing is worth living for if you don't have love.
Love is the one thing I don't have...I can't feel it, I lost it, I want my happiness back.

— The End —