I miss finding your hair
On jumpers you had never worn,
I miss the way our chargers
Plugged in together at the wall.
I miss the way you looked at me
When now all I see is scorn
I miss the way you seemed to care
The way we stood against the storm.

I miss feeling as if I had worth,
Finally, I wasn't alone on this earth.
I miss huddling for warmth,
Cuddling, chocolate and the hearth.
I miss you when we had heart
The days I would drive you home in the dark.
I miss the days I was by your side
Shoulder there every time you cried.
I miss not being miserable,
I miss wanting to be alive.
Mostly I miss being missed by you,
That sweet lie of I love you to.

I wish I were not psychotic
not to have this brain with a thousand weird functioning circuits
with a fantasy of its own

so I would be left alone from the society
that uninvited steps in my door
that goes and decides what is best for me

I met three today
I never asked them for a coffee
I never wanted to hang out with them today
but they shouted and screamed
what I did not want to hear
that I can not care of my son.

Ridiculous Gods

In clown clothes
scared of a different member.

Listen to this head
as it cracks in the weight of my thoughts
ants are passing all over
and I am but a corpse
running around
dragging a body today

did I have a bad day
or am I just being neurotic
or is it both.

She entered the big building;
A big hall,
Big shining lamps,
Big glass windows,
That revealed the green flocks of trees outside;

Walking in the hall
She knew that inside,
There stood God;

She headed towards him;
A white small table,
A white chair
Where God was sitting;

As soon as she saw him,
He was talking to her;
But it was in low voice.
So she kept asking to him
To speak louder;

Then she thought,
She understood something,
But was not sure,
What he said.

So she asked him to repeat;
He did not;
And somehow she understood,
That God was not speaking in english;
She was hearing the words,
He would say
And they sounded dry,
Without shape and form;
She thought:
«That could not be a language at all!»
She could not imagine
A language sounding like that;
It was obvious:
She could not understand God;
But what made a lasting impression to her,
Was that even god
Could not understand her!
He would not raise his voice,
She asked him to do so;

n the middle of the night,
I got up thirsty.
And I went to the kitchen
To drink a glass of water;

Iit was 2 o'clock
And everybody was sleeping,
But the television was on;

I got surprised;
I remembered very well
I had turned it off before;

As I headed towards it
To turn it off
I saw it was not playing a regular program;

It had a snapshot of a photo
And played it on;
There were black letters
On a white background;

This is what it wrote:
«I hate you!»
«I want to see you weak and brittle!»
«I want to see you crawl!»

Io instead of turning it off,
I grabbed it and threw it from the fifth floor;

I love our sweet little talks
I love your warm voice
your witty mind
when you have got a friend
you have got the world.

I like to do it with you
Sleeping with you
Is like honey that melts in the mouth.
Suddenly all my desire for *** returns.