Why is it
When I run I fall?

Why is it
When I try I fail?

Why is it
When I love I'm heartbroken?

Why is it
That I can't sort out my feelings...

Why is it
That I'm not allowed to date him?

Why is it
That my friends hate him?

Why is it
That I wanna love him?

Why can't I
Just choose for myself?

I finally found love
Yet the world won't let me have him...

People may think
They know what's going on
They know exactly what my sadness is like
But they don't
They don't know why I'm sad
In fact I don't either
They don't know why I hate myself
But I know why
It's because they judge my appearance
They don't know why I'm crying at night
I know why
It's because I know no one I love will ever understand me
It's not a phase
It's a fact
No one understands
No one cares
So I put on my smile
So no one has to deal with me
I trick myself into being happy
But it doesn't last long
Because reality always seems to interfere
Does everyone enjoy laughing at me?
Does everyone like ruining me?
Does anyone understand me?
Yes,
Yes,
and No.
I wish I could be a normal girl
My own room
I could have makeup
I could be pretty
I could have a best friend that understands me
But that isn't reality

This isn't even a poem anymore...

I am ok
Am am ok
Not am ok
OK am ok
And am ok
This am ok
Is am ok
My am ok
Cry am ok
For am ok
Help am ok
...
Come quick

I look in your eyes
You know they say they are the windows to your soul
Wanna know what I see?
I see hurt
Pain
Suffering
Come my dear,
Let me help you through your troubled times
We can walk in the woods to clear your mind
I'll take you to my favorite climbing tree
Where we can build a tree house over your insecurities

I take your hand in mine
Cold hands mean a warm heart
My dear your heart must be warm
It's too bad no one can see it
They wouldn't care anyway
The people in our school are monsters
Laughing at us

I hug you to protect you
From the animals in the woods
You've delt with enough today my best friend
Let's relax in the quiet for a change
Away from the other girls at our school

I look at your eyes
They don't look so sad
I see happiness
Laughter
And hope
But I know there is still fear
But we will get through it
Because your my best friend
And nothing will hurt you ever again

Memories of joyous times flood through my head
As we stare out into the ocean
And we look at each other again
We know we have been freed
So we jump into the warm water
And feel it on our skin
But this time we don't sink in the insecurities
But we swim up
Stronger than ever

Something is inside me
Swirling like a storm
An unending hurricane?
A monsterous tornado?
Or my own emotions
Trying to take hold of me