Maybe I shouldn’t  
Consciously dream about you
when i close my eyes
Or listen to songs that match the vibe
its a miserably hopeful way
of keeping you alive

i wanted to delete
every single trace of us
so that i had nothing to look back to
our past serve like bells
with the power to
awaken a passion so deep
no other love could ever meet
So when your name consumed my mind
there would be no rewind
cause when the past turns to ashes
i have no choice but to light the matches

and if words could dream
they would spend each night
yearning for a way
to justify how deeply
I love you

She was in everything i did
it was almost like
she was secretly
vibrating within my skin
not a day went by
when she didn’t consume my mind
i envied
the two birds flying
towards the blue night sky
and maybe it was
the summer breeze
or the empty streets
but for a moment or two
i let myself live vicariously
through the memories of you
Silently losing myself
in the shadow of your
Absence

I should envy
your invisible ability
to move on

So for a moment i did
i flew down memory lane
regretting each second
spent on your name
and anger flourished
through my veins
tears they fell down
with shame

but then i remembered
theres something incredibly
poetic about pain
that
healing craves
the absence of blame

now every couple i see
walking on the street
is a painful reminder
of what we could be

and the grass doesn’t stop growing
even though it continuously
is being cut down