These four walls that hold me,
Don’t define what I am.
Like a cage
Can’t define the animal
Stuck in it.

The capturer laughs
As I pour my heart out.
Shrieks of sour feelings,
Moans of despair.

I see all the people
Watching and poking,
Still feels like nobody’s there.

How much longer
Until I can finally fly?
I dream of the day,
But so many just go by.

After enduring the everydayness
Of these unfamiliar emotions.
I grapple with the concern that
I will never be the same.

How can I ?
When all my efforts have been in vain.
Who do I call to help out with the pain?
Who will shield me from the rain?

After enduring the everydayness
Of these unfamiliar emotions,
I can sit down and know,
To endure pain requires
Devotion.

I feel like a hole with no end.
How will it turn out
Besides inside out ?
How do I feel without
Tearing myself apart?
How do ease up on the pain ?
How do i?
How do I feel?

As I stare upon the sea,
I see myself dancing
between the waves,
wishing I were free
from all this pain.

One tear drops,
adding mass to
the already disdained.

I can’t be certain
if it will be washed away,
for I’m controlled by pain—
the same way the moon controls
the way the sea sways.

They say speaking the truth
sets you free.
How true is that,
when all the truth does
is nothing for me?

Why does the truth
hurt like a million
paper cuts,
while a lie—
a lie comforts you
like the sweet cuddle
of your beloved?

Let me live without knowing
if the truth
can’t set me free.