came to visit me again last night
seeping in when i was half asleep
embracing me from the inside
keeping me awake in his presence
he's not a friend
nor a foe
we solely co-exist
then i should probably get accustomed to his presence
regardless how queasy and uneasy he makes me feel
how he makes i small
probably he cares about me
i just need to
stop
him
***********
Stop.
Jun 29, 2014
Jun 29, 2014 at 6:51 AM UTC
tonight i am sad
tonight i am lonely
the demons are reaching out
and i need you to hold me
Jun 29, 2014
Jun 29, 2014 at 6:07 AM UTC
Hello, can you hear me?
Lately it seems that
I’m always the one standing here
Waiting for you to say
Those words of love, for attention
In reply to my precious words
Repeatedly, I’ve said them lately
Yet you haven’t said them at all
I always have to **** or poke you
Or think of something fascinating to say
Just hoping to catch your eye
I might be yours, but still
Do you ever think of me throughout your day?
Shrugging me off and not saying a word
Hurts a little, each and every time you do so
Busy bee you may be
But you said I was a priority
Yet it seems I have been left behind
Lately you only want to talk or pay attention to me
When it’s convenient for you
I'm a human being, don't you see
I feel for you more than you know
Realize that even just a couple of words
From you fills me with complete glee
I strive to keep you happy
Whenever I need you
Many times throughout a day
When I feel tired and lonely
All I want is you to comfort me
I just want your love, so please…
Could you say something?
Love me just a little more, keep me in your heart
Give me some of your time please
I've been patient, but I can't wait forever
Putting in the effort is your job too
I'm tired of feeling like a fool
Just for needing you
Tell me you love me, it's all I want to hear
Those words of sweetness
Let them fall from your lips
Caress my cheek with your fingertips
Look me in the eye and don't flinch
Jun 25, 2014
Jun 25, 2014 at 6:24 PM UTC
I stood there
And swallowed my pride like a pill
Which was more like a heavy lump
Slowly sliding down my throat
With a fake smile plastered on my face to hide my discomfort
I stared at you as you uttered the words I never wanted to hear
“I think we’re better off as friends”
I wanted to laugh in disbelief
But I was frozen with shock
As I realized
My day dreams of you are now pointless
And the hope for something more I once had
Has no basis because you took the possibility away
I refused to let you know that I was hurt
Because I didn’t want to be vulnerable in front of you
Anymore
You don’t deserve that from me, I thought
I can’t keep baring myself to you
It isn’t fair to me
Because you run away every time I try to open you up
Even though you should know by now
That I wouldn’t hurt you
But I can’t force you to try or to trust me
So I’ll just take a breath for now and let it be
~S.C.A.
Jun 25, 2014
Jun 25, 2014 at 4:10 AM UTC
The future of warfare
Technology is different but the mentality is the same
Human beings will continue to be slain
But people will do anything to claim
That we need them
Because profit is the benefit of fear
We’re told to fear those “terrorists”
When truthfully that word doesn’t mean ****
They’re different from us, sure
But that doesn’t give us the ******* right to
Claim that every single one of them is a murderer
Aiming these weapons at them just makes us what we’re trying to claim
They are
Politicians will tell you it’s just protecting our “security”
When all it does in reality is make us less safe
They see us the way we see them
This is a big problem and this is why war exists
Assumptions, stereotypes, and ********
Made to sound pretty and patriotic by militaristic dipshits
Isn’t it time we learn that the line between enemy and fellow citizen
Is one that doesn’t really exist
The only difference between them and US
Is location and the names on a map
Their culture or religion doesn’t make a difference
None of it gives us a right to point a drone at them and go “zap”
Let’s start a conversation
Before we have another useless war
They’re just as human as we are
Jun 25, 2014
Jun 25, 2014 at 4:00 AM UTC
Though there have been harsh words in the past i miss you more than id like to admit. I no longer feel the chains that bound me to your anchor but like any other choice ive made here i am filled with regret. Regret for what though? Being used as a convenience? I honestly cant believe it took me this long to see this. Thats love though, shining a light so bright in your eyes you cant see whats on the inside. Im sincerely grateful we didn't end up as one because the things you do to those who you "love" would shatter my perception on who you actually are. You hide behind the beauty and tears. Running from your fears while tripping your loved ones hoping itll take them instead. Ive never quite known someone like you and i hope i dont again. I wish nothing but the best for you "friend."
Jun 25, 2014
Jun 25, 2014 at 4:00 AM UTC
I have a trinket
I hold the world in my palms
And in the world i hold a woman who owns a voice that calms
This trinket is not magic
It's a godsend in disguise
And it harbors the words of a woman
With bright blue sky eyes
Now the distance is quite an issue
But it won't hold our demise
There are many miles ahead
And time is on our side
So I'll just lay here awake
Chatting away with someone in which i confide
And maybe one day I'll get a package
Marked precious cargo with you wrapped up inside
Jun 25, 2014
Jun 25, 2014 at 4:00 AM UTC
My life
Is a constant cycle
Of chasing sleep
And getting tripped
The moment I finally
Catch up.
Jun 25, 2014
Jun 25, 2014 at 4:00 AM UTC
If only I knew the price I'd pay
Living the same cycle day by day
The blood in my veins would soon run cold
The spark in my heart would abandon my soul
The comfort of my skin would wear away
The color of my city would turn to gray
The blood in my head would drain from my nose
Spending dime after dime left me out in the cold
If only I knew that I just had to try
Doses became higher
And so did I
Till I finally screamed, threw myself on the floor
I punched
I kicked
Couldn't take it anymore
Dose after dose
I couldn't see from my eyes
I laid on my back and looked up at the sky
If only I knew it was all part of the ride
Just a bunch of ****** up kids
With bloodshot eyes
Chasing our drinks instead of the sun
Only God knows the battle I've won.
Jun 25, 2014
Jun 25, 2014 at 4:00 AM UTC
I feel so pathetic at times like this
Eyes closed but mind wide open into the sharpened abyss
I see you passionately making love to another man
I see a silver engraved dagger shaking in my hands
I creep quietly through the room
Both of you know not of my existence
As you layed there before me
The knife glides right through him and into you
You don't even gasp its like you knew the fortune before the torment
its like i could understand what our clothes on the floor meant
i couldn't bare to see the sight i saw
As the words seep out through the wounds just underneath your jaw
There couldn't be any witnesses around to see
Me murderer the man i used to be
Jun 25, 2014
Jun 25, 2014 at 4:00 AM UTC