I sleep with a knife under my pillow.
I hold it in my hand as I fall asleep,
A lifeline.
Like the final rope holding me steady
To the ship I have sailed relentlessly,
Sweeping across the rolling waves,
I sleep with the knife in my hand,
I hold it just in case.
Apr 25, 2020
Apr 25, 2020 at 2:02 AM UTC
That's all he is,
All he ever was.
I was younger,
And stupid.
He is the coffin my mind
Lays down to sleep in
The body I see in my dreams
When it's not you with me.
The body laying in my garage
Underneath my breath,
Where you are now,
Where you wish to be.
He is a past lover,
That's all he ever was.
The one I see in my dreams
When it's not you with me.
Oct 10, 2019
Oct 10, 2019 at 11:42 AM UTC
I talk, and they ignore
The trees
Why won't they respond?
They talk to each other
They whisper
Why do they ignore me
Alone in the forest
I hear words
Amongst the trees
None of them are for me
Alone in the forest
Sep 12, 2019
Sep 12, 2019 at 10:08 PM UTC
My body and soul are not synonymous.
When I look at my body,
I still refer to it as she,
I stare into the mirror,
And she looks back at me.
You can regret her but please
Don't forget her.
We'll never be those kids again.
I can't wait to be someone else again.
I'm an anomaly, a shapeshifter.
Aug 27, 2019
Aug 27, 2019 at 9:33 PM UTC
I want to be sacred
In a way that only I can be.
I want to be held
In a way that only you can hold me.
Sacred in my skin, that falls from my bones,
When buried deep beneath the waves,
I want you to hold me sacred.
Jun 13, 2019
Jun 13, 2019 at 3:36 AM UTC
She's back;
There's ***** on the back of my tongue.
Sleep with a knife beside me in bed;
I fear that she'll retrieve the liquid red,
My time has been wasted, but I am still young.
She's back;
The creeping feeling behind my throat;
that maybe somehow I don't want to die,
But I don't want to stay alive.
If I give up the reins, that's all he wrote.
She's back;
The aching of my shoulders and back,
Losing pieces I fear I always lack,
I do not want to wake again;
She's back;
She's back;
She's back.
Jun 13, 2019
Jun 13, 2019 at 3:33 AM UTC
I am shaking in my core though my body is so tired
I miss you so much
I miss you so much.
I'm laying in my bed with my body feeling totally exhausted
And not in a fun way,
Feels like just lethargy and painful muscles,
I might cry just because my eyes
Are too ******* heavy now to hold in their tears.
I really ******* miss you all the ******* time
And I don't want to bother you
I don't want to bother you.
Your attention makes me feel validated
In a way that's truly gracious
I wish I had you here now.
Apr 17, 2019
Apr 17, 2019 at 5:58 PM UTC
Sprinkle sugar across your face, love
And trust me you'll be fine
Apr 9, 2019
Apr 9, 2019 at 11:42 PM UTC
She was beautiful. Blonde, blue eyes,
She loved sunshine and old rock music,
She was everything.
Sometimes things just fall apart.
It's okay.
She was nothing
Apr 1, 2019
Apr 1, 2019 at 3:16 PM UTC