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ramsha-ahmed
ramsha-ahmed
Most of the time, all I have are words.
And I don't know how many days have passed since the moment I started wondering about the tempest that came with the realization of existence. And I don't know how many hours of those days I wondered about whether I was the spawn being played on the chessboard, or whether I was the knight that was eliminated. And I don't know how many minutes of those hours I spent burning myself with the matchstick that would soon be incinerated like the string of emotions within me, nor do I know of whether I am the pheonix, or whether I am merely its ashes that were washed away with the rain. And I do not know how many seconds of those minutes I sought refuge in, nor have I paid any heed to the spasms that overtook me on the bridges in the photographs of the yesterdays. And I know not of how many lives I led in those seconds. And in those minutes, my memory fades unto, and in those hours, I write the stories, and in those days, I throw the paints onto the streets, so that they flow through the nooks and crannies and spread a few colours that I knew not of, for all I really knew was that my insomnia visited me when I missed you the most.
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Feb 9, 2015
Feb 9, 2015 at 2:57 PM UTC
Misdirections
I have felt the heat of a thousand flames, And witnessed the shattering of all of my hearts, Every word that escaped my mouth, Couldn't have been as blessed as your name. I have swum in a thousand lakes, And I've drowned in each one, with every breath a synapse of obliteration, And every heave of my soul the collaboration of all your suns. All my feathers lie in abysmal reticence, In reaches of an hour glass filled with ashes, Where every ash is the increment, Of promised prayers of retribution. There aren't many things I know forsure, For the world fades unto oblivion with every breath it takes, There couldn't have been anything more obscene, Then the innocense of your allure. But what I do know in bits and pieces, with closed eyes and whispered hope, Is that there lies a certain virtue, In the reaches of being a prisoner of the exhuberance of your soul...
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Nov 12, 2014
Nov 12, 2014 at 9:20 AM UTC
I have known you in a thousand ways
thoughts, they are         smoke escaping from chimneys and clouding darkened skies, skies home to birds flapping their wings trying to fly, thoughts are flying bricks falling all at once on shoulders already holding weights, weighing the night's silence on open palms and fingers blackened with soot hold feathers plucked from tree branches, seeking to clean bloodied slates in gardens where dreams flow down the river into caves -caves with lights at the end of tunnels, and lamps which flicker during storms and lightning which penetrates even closed eyes.                        thoughts, they are companions with opens arms which sometimes have knives hidden up their sleeves, and they are wells which hold coins- silver, gold, bronze and brass. dreams and wishes fondled by the gentle, sometimes      corrosive current of waves and shadows which carry the tube light just so they stay alive.      but these thoughts, they are also my reason for you, chains and leaves hanging with ease around a neck and rings which sing like canaries on insomniac fingers    and crimson letters carrying pictures, so with that is my justice, because with your name they give me solace, and with your image they give me peace and with the sound of your voice in the meadows of my mind, i find tranquility. and with the shadows that follow on my heels, i laugh and i smile,     because with these thoughts i am with you and you,           you are with me ---------
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Aug 19, 2014
Aug 19, 2014 at 11:36 AM UTC
t h o u g h t s.
thoughts, they are         smoke escaping from chimneys and clouding darkened skies, skies home to birds flapping their wings trying to fly, thoughts are flying bricks falling all at once on shoulders already holding weights, weighing the night's silence on open palms and fingers blackened with soot hold feathers plucked from tree branches, seeking to clean bloodied slates in gardens where dreams flow down the river into caves -caves with lights at the end of tunnels, and lamps which flicker during storms and lightning which penetrates even closed eyes.                        thoughts, they are companions with opens arms which sometimes have knives hidden up their sleeves, and they are wells which hold coins- silver, gold, bronze and brass. dreams and wishes fondled by the gentle, sometimes      corrosive current of waves and shadows which carry the tube light just so they stay alive.      but these thoughts, they are also my reason for you, chains and leaves hanging with ease around a neck and rings which sing like canaries on insomniac fingers    and crimson letters carrying pictures, so with that is my justice, because with your name they give me solace, and with your image they give me peace and with the sound of your voice in the meadows of my mind, i find tranquility. and with the shadows that follow on my heels, i laugh and i smile,     because with these thoughts i am with you and you,           you are with me ---------
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She wrote like she was struggling to breathe, like she was running after a train barefooted on railway tracks in the middle of winter, shivering shuddering, holding on to nothing at all but being held by screaming words tugging at her feet and biting into the ridges on her fingers She wrote like all the clocks in the world had come to a stand still, though days continued to pass, like the fluttering pages of an abandoned book in the midst of a raging storm She wrote sometimes like hail, pattering against steel-coated frozen rooftops, falling against doors left ajar bruising faces which taught her, how to shoot bullets At other times, she wrote like a gentle breeze, like the scent of rosewater and jasmine, and dirt lovingly caressed by morning dewdrops, and her words, they sometimes danced across paper, swaying with a trace of a brief smile, and then they fell with a thud, giggling in those sudden, fleeting moments of insanity, which make The Blissful incinerate themselves, into ashes which blow away in the wind And then at other times, her words were silent dark, brooding,  still, like the darkest corners of a rundown neighbourhood after midnight, like the dust which settles on suitcases filled with forgotten photographs, against the farthest wall of a quiet room . . . dark, brooding, still, like her soul, barred behind wood, engraved with the whispered words of the shadows of her fears.
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Aug 19, 2014
Aug 19, 2014 at 7:33 AM UTC
sciamachy.
Fire, for passion, desire and rage, Incinerated fingers bleeding over pieces of paper and rusting squeaking chains, which hang on ceilings of limestone and sins, Hosting windows through which letters scattered and blew away in the wind, The nails and screws which lie n the ground, they pierce the floors we built -the floors scream, yet we hear no sound, We walk with one foot in the grave, have we lost our minds? -these minds wish to abrase! Stumbling over rocks as we clash with the storms, we tremble and we cower, and we yearn for an abode, but when the rain sings, we run from the pour, For a haven, a shelter, maybe in the worlds out yonder, Down below the Earth, a place with no sonder. Yet, there is no proof of despondency, blood or perdition, but have we ever really walked along the path of retribution? Water, to drown out the voices in our heads, to erode the miseries and tear away the stead, to quench the thirst that never dies out, When we wish for a fire that doesn't extinguish; for a scripture, a route. But what can I say when I plead and I plead, but I am paid no heed? I used to walk in gardens that held an aura of purity, my thoughts were friends, and I bathed in disillusioned clarity, The scars on my body were merely scrapes on knees, When I fell from the swings or staggered down branches of trees, Now, I live in shadows which kiss my eyes, They hold me tight and whisper the lies, Lies which carve the truth in my mind; And at the dark hours, the truth on why I rely, Stabs me repeatedly as I fight the tremors at night. I throw knives at canvases and I create art, as my eyes accompany dark moons, and wounds mark my heart. Ropes on ladders, all broken and knotted, The deserted rooms and empty hallways, the drawers I've sought in, For feathers and footsteps, for answers and frozen clocks, For the sound of the past, the bullets we shot, The bracelets and bangles I wore on these wrists, The rings and promises I once clenched in these fists. I breathe and I clench this pen on a brink, and when they take away my paper, I’ll ink the words on my skin.
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Aug 14, 2014
Aug 14, 2014 at 3:50 AM UTC
fire and water
Fire, for passion, desire and rage, Incinerated fingers bleeding over pieces of paper and rusting squeaking chains, which hang on ceilings of limestone and sins, Hosting windows through which letters scattered and blew away in the wind, The nails and screws which lie n the ground, they pierce the floors we built -the floors scream, yet we hear no sound, We walk with one foot in the grave, have we lost our minds? -these minds wish to abrase! Stumbling over rocks as we clash with the storms, we tremble and we cower, and we yearn for an abode, but when the rain sings, we run from the pour, For a haven, a shelter, maybe in the worlds out yonder, Down below the Earth, a place with no sonder. Yet, there is no proof of despondency, blood or perdition, but have we ever really walked along the path of retribution? Water, to drown out the voices in our heads, to erode the miseries and tear away the stead, to quench the thirst that never dies out, When we wish for a fire that doesn't extinguish; for a scripture, a route. But what can I say when I plead and I plead, but I am paid no heed? I used to walk in gardens that held an aura of purity, my thoughts were friends, and I bathed in disillusioned clarity, The scars on my body were merely scrapes on knees, When I fell from the swings or staggered down branches of trees, Now, I live in shadows which kiss my eyes, They hold me tight and whisper the lies, Lies which carve the truth in my mind; And at the dark hours, the truth on why I rely, Stabs me repeatedly as I fight the tremors at night. I throw knives at canvases and I create art, as my eyes accompany dark moons, and wounds mark my heart. Ropes on ladders, all broken and knotted, The deserted rooms and empty hallways, the drawers I've sought in, For feathers and footsteps, for answers and frozen clocks, For the sound of the past, the bullets we shot, The bracelets and bangles I wore on these wrists, The rings and promises I once clenched in these fists. I breathe and I clench this pen on a brink, and when they take away my paper, I’ll ink the words on my skin.
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