I can’t believe I have decided to do this…
I can’t believe that this is happening..
This is my note.
This is my goodbye.
I’m sick of this.
Sick of this feeling.
The depression.
The hatred of myself.
Wanting to cut every inch of my arms and legs.
I’m done disappointing everyone:
Teachers
My parents
My friends
Everyone.
I’m sick..
And my only cure is death.
Apr 26, 2015
Apr 26, 2015 at 2:44 PM UTC
She shouted from the roof tops
Her love for him
And how it would never stop
He simply stared at her
In utter shock
nobody could ever love me
Or so he thought...
She smiled with her arms spread apart
Waiting for a response
He stood there silently
Unable to move but wanting to walk
Walk away from the lies
Cause he'd been hurt too many times
She begged and pleaded
Trying to make him believe
It's the truth she said
But he couldn't respond
Simply turned around to leave
women only hurt me
Was all he could believe
Too much pain and abuse
For those lies to become the truth
She sunk inside herself
Filled with pain and so many tears
After years of trying
She finally faced her fears
Only to be hit with rejection
Imperfections of love
Shown at there finest
She couldn't stand her thoughts...
He slowed his walk
Thought about the past
Suddenly came to realize
This life is your last
And there on that roof top
He may have finally found some hope
So he stopped his walk
Turned around to accept the truth
Only to find
That she had jumped off...
Mar 23, 2015
Mar 23, 2015 at 5:04 PM UTC
We are outcasts
Children born into dark
We listen to music that relates to us
We try to stand up and make our mark
Everyone thinks we cut
Or that we are depressed
They joke around and say mean things
Think we worship Satan and try to bless
But that's not who we are
That's not all we do
We cry, and laugh
We can love too
Yes, we may cut
And we may want to cry
But all you think we do is
Wish that we could die
Mar 19, 2015
Mar 19, 2015 at 12:43 AM UTC
My pencils are breaking-
Pens have spilled too much ink
But at least I'm still writing.
The flannel I have,
Smuggling collarbones
From chilly apartment-
I've worn that all week.
There's a cigarette burn
In one sleeve,
The buttons have come unhinged
During midnight runs to the corner
For cheap chocolate
And cigarettes.
Ramen boils
To salt my appetite.
But at least I'm still writing.
I leap from place to place,
Eyeing hoods passing by,
And I imagine guns tucked away.
The sink leaks,
There's not enough sun.
I'm high on debt
And college school books
Rot in the corner.
I guess my degree
Has gone putrid too.
My life's gone dingy and dark,
Suffocated by polluted winter.
Dark circles
Tell stories
Dreams can't remember.
But god **** at least I'm still writing.
Mar 19, 2015
Mar 19, 2015 at 12:17 AM UTC
There's nothing
More beautiful
Than discovering
You might actually
Be in love
There's nothing
More heartbreaking
Than noticing
You're finally loved
Yet unable to return it
There's nothing
More painful
Than realizing
You'll never be able
To truly love again
There's nothing
More discouraging
Than remembering
You've been hurt
Too many times
***And your heart can never
be healed enough to love
as fully as you once did.***
Mar 2, 2015
Mar 2, 2015 at 2:55 AM UTC
***there's a certain pain
you can't explain
although you've tried
it has no name
it starts out right
between the eyes
then makes it's way
into the mind
of this your sure
there is no cure
of what ails you
to the core
still you try
with all your might
as you turn to
the massage of rhyme
you choose a poem
known or unknown
you can cling to
and not let go
you sense relief
as it massages deep
giving over to
your basic needs
as the pain
slowly fades
you know that all
will be okay***
Feb 19, 2015
Feb 19, 2015 at 12:36 AM UTC
Fill my cup
with your scent
Let me drown
in your essence
I'm dying
of thirst
And you're the only
sustenance
On which
I can thrive
And finally
Feel alive
Feb 18, 2015
Feb 18, 2015 at 10:02 PM UTC
Dear Cigarrette in My Hand,
I love the way you make me feel. All the anxiety the world creates and you, my dear friend, are the only one that makes things better. You are the one I crave, the one I love. My loved ones say you are no good for me, but I laugh them off. They could never understand how I feel when I inhale your sweet poison. The euphoric feeling makes me feel almost sane. Slowly, I know you are killing me, but how can I face the world each day without your kiss? How can I calm myself and clear my head without your great influence? Tell me, my love, why must you **** me when I have shown you nothing but love?
To be honest, the answers to these questions mean nothing to me. There is no way that I could give you up. There is no way I could live without you. I would rather die by your loving embrace than the cold pressure of the world beyond us. I love you, my sweet cigarrette. I love you!
From the One Who Truly Loves You,
Feb 17, 2015
Feb 17, 2015 at 6:47 PM UTC
To be the reason you breathe
Your every thought
Your every dream
Your purpose in life
Would be the reason I breathe
To be what makes you believe
Your reason for living
Your reason for smiling
Your motivation for existing
Would be what makes me believe
To be the one you depend on
Your rock when you need to lean
Your shoulder when you need to cry
Your soft place to land, when life's too hard
Would be the only thing I could depend on
To be the one who helps you feel strong
Your innocence when it doesn't belong
Your heart when yours breaks in two
Your soul when it's shattered too
Would be what makes me feel strong
***and of all these things
To breathe and believe
To depend on, to feel strong
I only need you
To feel that I belong***
Feb 8, 2015
Feb 8, 2015 at 1:21 AM UTC
I'm a passerby
On this road of life
Sleeping all day
Zombie by night
No purpose
No reason
No rhyme
In this winter season
The only thing
I want to find
Is a quiet
Lonely place
To slowly waste away
and
die
Feb 1, 2015
Feb 1, 2015 at 10:23 PM UTC