AxtonRupp - Hello Poetry

Love, please find me, I am waiting with open arms The butterflies in my belly are ready to flutter No eyes for another, deep breath... reach for the hand of my lover Delicate, slender, fingers, wrapped around mine Signifies our feelings are intertwined Excuse my daydream, it abuses my heart Off gallivanting in my imagination for a lark Be at the start of something beautiful Love, please find me, I am waiting with bated breath Wishing to be adept at the depths of love Savor a shared kiss, to later reminisce on the flavour of your lips To twist & turn, to learn & grow, to love & never let go Alas, I have been shunned, left out in the cold, where I will wither, growing old Love deems me no sight to behold Scolded by your intensity, my propensity is to scamper from your light There is no warmth in darkness but it is all I have known By Axton Rupp

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Jan 31, 2019

Jan 31, 2019 at 3:42 AM UTC

Adept at the Depths of Love

Love, please find me, I am waiting with open arms The butterflies in my belly are ready to flutter No eyes for another, deep breath... reach for the hand of my lover Delicate, slender, fingers, wrapped around mine Signifies our feelings are intertwined Excuse my daydream, it abuses my heart Off gallivanting in my imagination for a lark Be at the start of something beautiful Love, please find me, I am waiting with bated breath Wishing to be adept at the depths of love Savor a shared kiss, to later reminisce on the flavour of your lips To twist & turn, to learn & grow, to love & never let go Alas, I have been shunned, left out in the cold, where I will wither, growing old Love deems me no sight to behold Scolded by your intensity, my propensity is to scamper from your light There is no warmth in darkness but it is all I have known By Axton Rupp

17

I reside in my feelings Classify myself as soft Tender is my ego from my tinder experience On bumble I was stung, only to be left stumbling No fresh coffee wants to meet a day old bagel I create fables with my imagination The open wound on my sleeve festers Causing thoughts to manifest They get the best of me, so y'all get the worst My lifelong curse I could listen to every song about love Never finding a verse to relate to It's late as I write this too, or early based on perspective I need a Detective, to locate my innocence Where in then, I might find the man I am supposed to be Sought out affection from the wrong places Chasing those that fear being caught Weary from the pursuit, I become a mute Ask me to speak up but the point is moot Run along, practice your shoot dance Romance, that induces a trance, is an intoxicating aroma Pity that my presence is nauseating There is no debating, I know my history I am no mystery, just misguided by my own hand I write because I am left with reading between the lines I'll stand the test of time Sands through the hourglass This is the daze that is my life By Axton Rupp

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Jan 22, 2019

Jan 22, 2019 at 1:19 AM UTC

Reside

I reside in my feelings Classify myself as soft Tender is my ego from my tinder experience On bumble I was stung, only to be left stumbling No fresh coffee wants to meet a day old bagel I create fables with my imagination The open wound on my sleeve festers Causing thoughts to manifest They get the best of me, so y'all get the worst My lifelong curse I could listen to every song about love Never finding a verse to relate to It's late as I write this too, or early based on perspective I need a Detective, to locate my innocence Where in then, I might find the man I am supposed to be Sought out affection from the wrong places Chasing those that fear being caught Weary from the pursuit, I become a mute Ask me to speak up but the point is moot Run along, practice your shoot dance Romance, that induces a trance, is an intoxicating aroma Pity that my presence is nauseating There is no debating, I know my history I am no mystery, just misguided by my own hand I write because I am left with reading between the lines I'll stand the test of time Sands through the hourglass This is the daze that is my life By Axton Rupp

29

My family hates me & I have no friends I be myself, it's not good enough Reflect, make changes, it's not good enough Call my bluff Ask me your fluff questions Tell me I'm wrong Pointing out qualities that are good I'll counter with the facts of my life Show you the lack of love, I have for myself How I have dealt with guilt Attempting to outrun shame Embarrassed by my thoughts Tootie ought to sit down for an hour session My ‘how to ****** your life lessons’ I count my blessings They never amount to happiness I'm in a place where joy is fleeting While your all celebrating with festive cheer I'll be over here, in my familiar sunken place Once a pillar of strength, on the outside Is a mere shell, mimicking the motions of perceived normality To those that think I am a friend or consider me family There's still time for me to prove you wrong It will dawn upon you & you'll question… What was I ever drawn to? You'll cast away your heavy dark shadow While I wrap myself it's embrace Lonely is my mind, heart & soul With no family or friends to fill that hole Behold, my inner honest thoughts By Axton Rupp

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Dec 16, 2018

Dec 16, 2018 at 4:01 AM UTC

Behold

My family hates me & I have no friends I be myself, it's not good enough Reflect, make changes, it's not good enough Call my bluff Ask me your fluff questions Tell me I'm wrong Pointing out qualities that are good I'll counter with the facts of my life Show you the lack of love, I have for myself How I have dealt with guilt Attempting to outrun shame Embarrassed by my thoughts Tootie ought to sit down for an hour session My ‘how to ****** your life lessons’ I count my blessings They never amount to happiness I'm in a place where joy is fleeting While your all celebrating with festive cheer I'll be over here, in my familiar sunken place Once a pillar of strength, on the outside Is a mere shell, mimicking the motions of perceived normality To those that think I am a friend or consider me family There's still time for me to prove you wrong It will dawn upon you & you'll question… What was I ever drawn to? You'll cast away your heavy dark shadow While I wrap myself it's embrace Lonely is my mind, heart & soul With no family or friends to fill that hole Behold, my inner honest thoughts By Axton Rupp

31

Searching for balance Equality within one's self Battles rage between Survival Gratitude Purity And sinister behaviors Are they merely excuses For my greed? For my self-indulgence? For security? For relationships both friendly & otherwise? I know I'm doing wrong to live right Everybody has a hustle Crooked or straight On this life's wander I've encountered forks Try to take the righteous Drawn to the lure of the shadows Eventually, make my own path In the grey, diagonal Until I'm presented with the next opportunity Never knowing When it'll spring upon me Believe me or not I'm a good person Even if I'm unsure at moments myself **** the cards I was dealt I'm a chess player Think Risk Win Despite my means I do my dirt all by my lonely Maintain being humble & true With unwavering loyalty To those that reciprocate By Axton Rupp

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Dec 15, 2018

Dec 15, 2018 at 4:26 AM UTC

Forks

Searching for balance Equality within one's self Battles rage between Survival Gratitude Purity And sinister behaviors Are they merely excuses For my greed? For my self-indulgence? For security? For relationships both friendly & otherwise? I know I'm doing wrong to live right Everybody has a hustle Crooked or straight On this life's wander I've encountered forks Try to take the righteous Drawn to the lure of the shadows Eventually, make my own path In the grey, diagonal Until I'm presented with the next opportunity Never knowing When it'll spring upon me Believe me or not I'm a good person Even if I'm unsure at moments myself **** the cards I was dealt I'm a chess player Think Risk Win Despite my means I do my dirt all by my lonely Maintain being humble & true With unwavering loyalty To those that reciprocate By Axton Rupp

38

A lifelong loner, with the dawn of each day, keeps one promise, more sadness & agony Father abandoned me, mother too high to visit me, leaves me with an abuser, to show me their ways To this day, I think of you & all you have taught me How to live in fear, not being myself, become a character to please those that may fear me People skills non-existent, however, I stayed resilient, through the insults & feeling unworthy Surely, someone will see a light in me, or is it too dim? Oh, that's right, you view me as glib Back in my place, with a lid put on it Did I do something to offend? Merely being born in this world of sin, forgive me where is the gun? That's what I should have done, many moons ago, end it all before I knew better Since I know better, when will I become better? Never is the answer I am a cancer, that has stricken two families Cut me out, lump removed, it behooves you, but you knew this Then there are the "friendships" I attempted to wedge myself in Unknowing of how to be a friend, I'd watch, learn, mimic & pretend Now I'll surely fit in? Nah loser, another sad talespin, leaves me Baloo I continue to watch & learn, this time from afar With the bar set to a new low, by my own hand, I stand in a shadow, from the lights sight Darkness is my home, the ground is my throne I sit in a mess of my own making, quaking, with a handout I am a man down & many days out Yet, no one knows the depths of my pain All the snickers, pushed me towards the snickers, elevating the bar Inward scars become visible on the outside, stretched across my skin Another attempt at a "normal" life in an abnormal society Taking all the lessons learned to craft a new me Authentically, unapologetically, me Wishing you well, wayward son of no one By Axton Rupp

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Dec 11, 2018

Dec 11, 2018 at 2:54 AM UTC

A Lifelong Loner

A lifelong loner, with the dawn of each day, keeps one promise, more sadness & agony Father abandoned me, mother too high to visit me, leaves me with an abuser, to show me their ways To this day, I think of you & all you have taught me How to live in fear, not being myself, become a character to please those that may fear me People skills non-existent, however, I stayed resilient, through the insults & feeling unworthy Surely, someone will see a light in me, or is it too dim? Oh, that's right, you view me as glib Back in my place, with a lid put on it Did I do something to offend? Merely being born in this world of sin, forgive me where is the gun? That's what I should have done, many moons ago, end it all before I knew better Since I know better, when will I become better? Never is the answer I am a cancer, that has stricken two families Cut me out, lump removed, it behooves you, but you knew this Then there are the "friendships" I attempted to wedge myself in Unknowing of how to be a friend, I'd watch, learn, mimic & pretend Now I'll surely fit in? Nah loser, another sad talespin, leaves me Baloo I continue to watch & learn, this time from afar With the bar set to a new low, by my own hand, I stand in a shadow, from the lights sight Darkness is my home, the ground is my throne I sit in a mess of my own making, quaking, with a handout I am a man down & many days out Yet, no one knows the depths of my pain All the snickers, pushed me towards the snickers, elevating the bar Inward scars become visible on the outside, stretched across my skin Another attempt at a "normal" life in an abnormal society Taking all the lessons learned to craft a new me Authentically, unapologetically, me Wishing you well, wayward son of no one By Axton Rupp

29

Where am I going? I want to see it all The four corners The heart of the motherland What is missing? The beat to my heart A kindred light Hand in hand Will, I ever witness a periwinkle sky? Near the border of Shanghai Certify our pleasure Flying high together By Axton Rupp

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Dec 5, 2018

Dec 5, 2018 at 4:25 AM UTC

Near the border of Shanghai

Where am I going? I want to see it all The four corners The heart of the motherland What is missing? The beat to my heart A kindred light Hand in hand Will, I ever witness a periwinkle sky? Near the border of Shanghai Certify our pleasure Flying high together By Axton Rupp

13

How vein & narcissistic can I be? Always sad & lonely yet I think women could be interested in me? This is left field, not a representation of reality Is my somber attitude a formality? Hidden from public view behind my frowning veil? Obese, with odd thoughts Striving to be normal or recognized as such Drunk on my own pity & arrogance, I'm quite the lush Complex? No... merely a mutt, that's the **** of life's jokes Mush, mush, I'm a foolish hound In here, there is not a sound Hollow as an empty gym with a bouncing rebound This is me announcing to the world I'm full of myself, how absurd I perturb yours truly A running tab of my thoughts Scattered among my bruised & battered memories Confused is who I'll always be No matter, until I find my next heartache Or perhaps a sullen place? By Axton Rupp

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Dec 1, 2018

Dec 1, 2018 at 2:21 AM UTC

A Sullen Place

How vein & narcissistic can I be? Always sad & lonely yet I think women could be interested in me? This is left field, not a representation of reality Is my somber attitude a formality? Hidden from public view behind my frowning veil? Obese, with odd thoughts Striving to be normal or recognized as such Drunk on my own pity & arrogance, I'm quite the lush Complex? No... merely a mutt, that's the **** of life's jokes Mush, mush, I'm a foolish hound In here, there is not a sound Hollow as an empty gym with a bouncing rebound This is me announcing to the world I'm full of myself, how absurd I perturb yours truly A running tab of my thoughts Scattered among my bruised & battered memories Confused is who I'll always be No matter, until I find my next heartache Or perhaps a sullen place? By Axton Rupp

21

Alone, my familiar home, with only my thoughts to keep me company Four hours ago, everything was lovely with you beside me I revere your essence, your presence, your grin coupled with your laugh of delight Each night working together, my fondness for you flourishes, it nourishes my soul One evening it almost slipped, during one of our quips, but I bit my lip In fear not to lose a glimmer of potential friendship I like the way your skin glistens in the fluorescent glow from above You have me misted to the point I wish we could share kisses Another lost one Trying to hide inward feelings, leaves me with scars buried inside Attempts to take it in stride, abide by self-imposed rules Tools used to contain inane thinking By Axton Rupp

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Nov 28, 2018

Nov 28, 2018 at 12:56 AM UTC

Another Lost One

Alone, my familiar home, with only my thoughts to keep me company Four hours ago, everything was lovely with you beside me I revere your essence, your presence, your grin coupled with your laugh of delight Each night working together, my fondness for you flourishes, it nourishes my soul One evening it almost slipped, during one of our quips, but I bit my lip In fear not to lose a glimmer of potential friendship I like the way your skin glistens in the fluorescent glow from above You have me misted to the point I wish we could share kisses Another lost one Trying to hide inward feelings, leaves me with scars buried inside Attempts to take it in stride, abide by self-imposed rules Tools used to contain inane thinking By Axton Rupp

13

How many more times can I write about love...or the lack thereof? Endless streams of couples, bursting with passion Wrapped in affection This lonely pain intensifies each sunrise By the time the sun sets I am ready to lament I wish each cry washed away the heartache If all my sighs could open up a ladies eyes The classic nice guy that's even worst off, because I'm shy In my feelings, over thinking, WHY!?! How many more time can I write about a feeling I know nothing about? Endless streams of couples, viewed from my rose coloured lens Wrapped in a sham By Axton Rupp

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Nov 3, 2018

Nov 3, 2018 at 2:14 AM UTC

How many more times...

How many more times can I write about love...or the lack thereof? Endless streams of couples, bursting with passion Wrapped in affection This lonely pain intensifies each sunrise By the time the sun sets I am ready to lament I wish each cry washed away the heartache If all my sighs could open up a ladies eyes The classic nice guy that's even worst off, because I'm shy In my feelings, over thinking, WHY!?! How many more time can I write about a feeling I know nothing about? Endless streams of couples, viewed from my rose coloured lens Wrapped in a sham By Axton Rupp

13

Co-Authors of tale between two Illustrations by our imagination Credit to our love Purely in my mind Accentuated from thoughts Wishful thinking in abundance All I have is honesty in my heart Now, wherefore art thou courage? The ending is never new There will be me Without you By Axton Rupp

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Oct 25, 2018

Oct 25, 2018 at 4:00 AM UTC

Co-Authors

Co-Authors of tale between two Illustrations by our imagination Credit to our love Purely in my mind Accentuated from thoughts Wishful thinking in abundance All I have is honesty in my heart Now, wherefore art thou courage? The ending is never new There will be me Without you By Axton Rupp

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